Favorite Quotes - Page 22 - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Ohio8 · 05-05-2024, 06:45 PM

Lisa: "Oh, you know, that's that show where this old man has struck oil in the hills, and he packed up his kit and he moved his whole caboodle to Beverly Hills, which really isn't a hill, but it's near to California."

cd637299 · 05-06-2024, 08:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stevea

Oliver: What the? ....

….and of course “Oh, for the love of…”

cd

Ohio8 · 05-07-2024, 08:10 PM

Eva Gabor: "This has been a Filmways presentation, darling."

ThisLittlePiggy · 06-11-2024, 01:04 PM

Lisa Douglas: Mr. Haney, how can you prove that Arnold is related to Herman?

Haney: It's simple. I use the blood sample comparison method. Now if you'll step with me to the back of my mo-bile laboratory. I call it that because it was given to me by a grateful customer, Moe Bile.

Ohio8 · 11-29-2024, 07:35 PM

Ralph: "Youth before beauty. Or is it beauty before youth?"
Alf: "What difference does it make? You don't fit either one."

ThisLittlePiggy · 07-26-2025, 12:08 PM

- Now here is a
beautiful birthday gift

that would look wonderful
hanging on Mrs. Douglas' neck.

The Hope diamond.

- The Hope diamond?!

- It was wore by Bob Hope

in The Road to South Africa.

stevea · 08-26-2025, 01:34 PM

Lisa: What would you like [for breakfast]?

Oliver: Ham and Eggs

Lisa: We don't have any ham.

Oliver: We COULD have (with a conniving stare at Arnold).

Arnold runs away, screaming.

cd637299 · 08-26-2025, 01:48 PM

[^ yeah that was a good one. I thought I posted this, but apparently not—>]

(Paraphrasing)

Oliver: Lisa, have you seen Arnold?
Lisa: He went into town. He is trying out for a part in a local play.
Oliver: What play is that? “Porky and Bess”? Hahahaha
Lisa: No. Pig-malion.

cd

stevea · 08-28-2025, 02:14 PM

Oliver: Oh, I see you've developed a lot of muscles there, sawing away at those things [Lisa's hotcakes].

Lori: Mrs. Douglas gave me the recipe, so my aunt can make these for me.

Oliver: Is your aunt a good cook?

Lori: Very good.

(Oliver snatches the recipe sheet and tears it up)

Oliver: Let's keep her that way.

cd637299 · 09-02-2025, 08:19 PM

[continuing the hotcakes angle….paraphrasing again. Oliver, Lisa, and Eb are being held hostage at home by crooks….]

Oliver: I assure you, there’ll be no trouble.
Crook: I’m hungry. Can you make anything?
Lisa: I can make hotscakes.
Oliver: There’ll be trouble.

cd

MA · 09-05-2025, 07:37 AM

Oliver Douglas: But he couldn't be dead.
Fred Ziffel: Oh, yes he could, I personally attended his funeral.
Oliver Douglas: Are you sure?
Fred Ziffel: I don't know what you do in New York, but around here we don't give a man a funeral unless we're pretty sure he needs one.

05-05-2024, 06:45 PM	#316
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,914	Lisa: "Oh, you know, that's that show where this old man has struck oil in the hills, and he packed up his kit and he moved his whole caboodle to Beverly Hills, which really isn't a hill, but it's near to California."
	__________________ "Shorter of breath and one day closer to death." -- Pink Floyd

09-05-2025, 07:37 AM	#326
MA Member Moderator Forum Idol Join Date: May 20, 2017 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 127,322	Oliver Douglas: But he couldn't be dead. Fred Ziffel: Oh, yes he could, I personally attended his funeral. Oliver Douglas: Are you sure? Fred Ziffel: I don't know what you do in New York, but around here we don't give a man a funeral unless we're pretty sure he needs one.
	__________________ ~-Mikaela-~

05-07-2024, 08:10 PM	#318
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,914	Eva Gabor: "This has been a Filmways presentation, darling."

06-11-2024, 01:04 PM	#319
ThisLittlePiggy Member Forum Junkie Join Date: Nov 02, 2013 Posts: 83,858	Lisa Douglas: Mr. Haney, how can you prove that Arnold is related to Herman? Haney: It's simple. I use the blood sample comparison method. Now if you'll step with me to the back of my mo-bile laboratory. I call it that because it was given to me by a grateful customer, Moe Bile.

11-29-2024, 07:35 PM	#320
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,914	Ralph: "Youth before beauty. Or is it beauty before youth?" Alf: "What difference does it make? You don't fit either one."

07-26-2025, 12:08 PM	#321
ThisLittlePiggy Member Forum Junkie Join Date: Nov 02, 2013 Posts: 83,858	- Now here is a beautiful birthday gift that would look wonderful hanging on Mrs. Douglas' neck. The Hope diamond. - The Hope diamond?! - It was wore by Bob Hope in The Road to South Africa.

08-26-2025, 01:34 PM	#322
stevea 22 Years On Sitcoms Moderator Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 13, 2003 Location: Indy Posts: 44,488	Lisa: What would you like [for breakfast]? Oliver: Ham and Eggs Lisa: We don't have any ham. Oliver: We COULD have (with a conniving stare at Arnold). Arnold runs away, screaming.

08-26-2025, 01:48 PM	#323
cd637299 cd637299 Forum Regular Join Date: Dec 14, 2022 Location: South Florida Posts: 846	[^ yeah that was a good one. I thought I posted this, but apparently not—>] (Paraphrasing) Oliver: Lisa, have you seen Arnold? Lisa: He went into town. He is trying out for a part in a local play. Oliver: What play is that? “Porky and Bess”? Hahahaha Lisa: No. Pig-malion. cd

08-28-2025, 02:14 PM	#324
stevea 22 Years On Sitcoms Moderator Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 13, 2003 Location: Indy Posts: 44,488	Oliver: Oh, I see you've developed a lot of muscles there, sawing away at those things [Lisa's hotcakes]. Lori: Mrs. Douglas gave me the recipe, so my aunt can make these for me. Oliver: Is your aunt a good cook? Lori: Very good. (Oliver snatches the recipe sheet and tears it up) Oliver: Let's keep her that way.

09-02-2025, 08:19 PM	#325
cd637299 cd637299 Forum Regular Join Date: Dec 14, 2022 Location: South Florida Posts: 846	[continuing the hotcakes angle….paraphrasing again. Oliver, Lisa, and Eb are being held hostage at home by crooks….] Oliver: I assure you, there’ll be no trouble. Crook: I’m hungry. Can you make anything? Lisa: I can make hotscakes. Oliver: There’ll be trouble. cd