Candance Cameron Bure Defends Being "Submissive" to her Husband - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

JamesG · 01-08-2014, 01:42 PM

Candance Cameron Bure Defends Being "Submissive" to her Husband
Jan 8, 2014
by Sadie Gennis

Candance Cameron Bure has been happily married to ex-NHL player Valeri Bure for 17 years, but how the former "Full House" achieves marital success has outraged many.

In her new book Balancing It All: My Story of Juggling Priorities and Purpose, Bure writes: "My husband is a natural born leader. I quickly learned that I had to find a way of honoring his take-charge personality and not get frustrated about his desire to have the final decision on just about everything. I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage and family work."

While appearing on HuffPost Live, Bure clarified what she meant by the word "submissive," saying she's using the "biblical definition."

"So, it is meekness, it is not weakness," the mother of three explained. "It is strength under control, it is bridled strength. And that's what I choose to have in my marriage."

Bure, 37, went on to insist that simply because she chooses to be submissive, that doesn't necessarily mean she isn't given any say when it comes to making major family decisions.

"Listen, I love that my man is a leader. I want him to lead and be the head of our family and those major decisions do fall on him. It doesn't mean I don't voice my opinion and it doesn't mean I don't have an opinion — I absolutely do but it is very difficult to have two heads of authority," Bure said.

"It doesn't work. ... And when you're competing with two heads that can pose a lot of problems or issues. So within my marriage we are equal in our importance, but we are just different in our performances within our marriage."

Bure added that she always allows her husband to make the final decision on a matter, even if she doesn't agree with it.

"I trust my husband, but that trust has been built," Bure said. "And I know that because I trust him and I build him up and give him the respect that he would like to have within marriage that he so listens to everything that I have to say and takes my opinion very seriously. And many of the times he will sway to what I would like, even if he doesn't see eye to eye with me because he really values my opinion."

http://www.tvguide.com/News/Candance...d-1075359.aspx

Marvo301 · 01-08-2014, 02:42 PM

If they're still happily married after 17 years then they're obviously doing something right! God bless them!

MacLeaper · 01-08-2014, 04:25 PM

Quote:

Candance Cameron Bure Defends Being "Submissive" to her Husband

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Candance Cameron Bure Defends Being "Submissive" to her Husband
Jan 8, 2014
by Sadie Gennis

Candance Cameron Bure has been happily married to ex-NHL player Valeri Bure for 17 years, but how the former "Full House" achieves marital success has outraged many.

In her new book Balancing It All: My Story of Juggling Priorities and Purpose, Bure writes: "My husband is a natural born leader. I quickly learned that I had to find a way of honoring his take-charge personality and not get frustrated about his desire to have the final decision on just about everything. I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage and family work."

While appearing on HuffPost Live, Bure clarified what she meant by the word "submissive," saying she's using the "biblical definition."

"So, it is meekness, it is not weakness," the mother of three explained. "It is strength under control, it is bridled strength. And that's what I choose to have in my marriage."

Bure, 37, went on to insist that simply because she chooses to be submissive, that doesn't necessarily mean she isn't given any say when it comes to making major family decisions.

"Listen, I love that my man is a leader. I want him to lead and be the head of our family and those major decisions do fall on him. It doesn't mean I don't voice my opinion and it doesn't mean I don't have an opinion — I absolutely do but it is very difficult to have two heads of authority," Bure said.

"It doesn't work. ... And when you're competing with two heads that can pose a lot of problems or issues. So within my marriage we are equal in our importance, but we are just different in our performances within our marriage."

Amen! Candace is following The Bible's commands for marriage. Ephesians 5 is a key chapter that talks about this- yes, wives are called to be submissive to their husbands. And husbands are called to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. It doesn't mean women don't get a say in the marriage, but the husband is the one God has put as the head of the household. (Part of this goes back to the fall of man in Genesis 3- this is part of the punishments the world is still dealing with because of that- though the woman's desire will be for her husband, he will rule over her.)
What a great example of a Godly marriage. Congratulations to them for their 17 years and hopefully many more to come. :-)

Wawwie · 01-09-2014, 02:46 AM

Sounds more like a parent/child relationship.

IllinoisTVFan · 01-09-2014, 04:05 AM

While I believe in a marriage one is the leader I do not believe it is always the husband. Some women are dominant, I am one. This whole "the man makes the final decision" does not sit well with me and I am a very devout Catholic. One has to remember the times when the Bible was written and how women in general had little rights. However if it works for them, good for them. Everyone needs to find what works for them.

Wawwie · 01-09-2014, 04:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IllinoisTVFan

While I believe in a marriage one is the leader

How about a partnership? That's what a marriage is, not this crap like "my man is a great leader." That sounds like something a child would say about her dad.

IllinoisTVFan · 01-09-2014, 04:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wawwie

How about a partnership? That's what a marriage is, not this crap like "my man is a great leader." That sounds like something a child would say about her dad.

A partnership definitely. I was thinking of specific cases there needs to be an ultimate leader to make decisions but do not think it is gender specific.

Ant-Lox · 01-09-2014, 07:00 AM

It has worked for them, and she shows no signs of being abused, they'll last forever.

JamesG · 01-09-2014, 11:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by IllinoisTVFan

Some women are dominant, I am one.

I like that.

arsensson84 · 02-23-2014, 03:45 AM

Typical example of a christian woman who has no backbone to stand up for herself if she thinks her male mate's decisions are wrong, but she will rather let him always have his way. She should pull herself together and act as an equal to him, not his subordinate...

bliss · 02-23-2014, 02:07 PM

What is this the 1950's.

TMC · 12-03-2014, 02:02 AM

Candace and I hate to say this, strikes me as a very pious, holler-than-thou person (especially when she was on Dancing with the Stars). I wouldn't be surprised if she was "brainwashed" by her big brother Kirk. It seems like Candace is able to get away w/ more stuff than Kirk because she isn't as "insensitive" when sharing her beliefs (plus Candace at the peak of her Full House notoriety wasn't exactly as big of a star as Kirk was when he was on Growing Pains)

TMC · 12-03-2014, 02:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ant-Lox

It has worked for them, and she shows no signs of being abused, they'll last forever.

And ironically if you look at the stuff that Candace did immediately following Full House...
1996 - Zack Morris raped her and Kevin Arnold beat and killed her.

Blackout · 12-03-2014, 07:49 PM

lmao wtf

Will and Grace Fanatic · 12-03-2014, 10:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TMC

Candace and I hate to say this, strikes me as a very pious, holler-than-thou person (especially when she was on Dancing with the Stars). I wouldn't be surprised if she was "brainwashed" by her big brother Kirk. It seems like Candace is able to get away w/ more stuff than Kirk because she isn't as "insensitive" when sharing her beliefs (plus Candace at the peak of her Full House notoriety wasn't exactly as big of a star as Kirk was when he was on Growing Pains)

I'm pretty sure Kirk did brainwash her. However, she is much smarter than he is. She doesn't want to offend any of her fans so she kinda keeps quiet about certain beliefs. Very smart on her part!

01-08-2014, 01:42 PM	#1
JamesG Freakshow Moderator Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 01, 2008 Location: Brooklyn, NY Posts: 57,129	Candance Cameron Bure Defends Being "Submissive" to her Husband *Candance Cameron Bure Defends Being "Submissive" to her Husband* Jan 8, 2014 by Sadie Gennis Candance Cameron Bure has been happily married to ex-NHL player Valeri Bure for 17 years, but how the former "Full House" achieves marital success has outraged many. In her new book Balancing It All: My Story of Juggling Priorities and Purpose, Bure writes: "My husband is a natural born leader. I quickly learned that I had to find a way of honoring his take-charge personality and not get frustrated about his desire to have the final decision on just about everything. I am not a passive person, but I chose to fall into a more submissive role in our relationship because I wanted to do everything in my power to make my marriage and family work." While appearing on HuffPost Live, Bure clarified what she meant by the word "submissive," saying she's using the "biblical definition." "So, it is meekness, it is not weakness," the mother of three explained. "It is strength under control, it is bridled strength. And that's what I choose to have in my marriage." Bure, 37, went on to insist that simply because she chooses to be submissive, that doesn't necessarily mean she isn't given any say when it comes to making major family decisions. "Listen, I love that my man is a leader. I want him to lead and be the head of our family and those major decisions do fall on him. It doesn't mean I don't voice my opinion and it doesn't mean I don't have an opinion — I absolutely do but it is very difficult to have two heads of authority," Bure said. "It doesn't work. ... And when you're competing with two heads that can pose a lot of problems or issues. So within my marriage we are equal in our importance, but we are just different in our performances within our marriage." Bure added that she always allows her husband to make the final decision on a matter, even if she doesn't agree with it. "I trust my husband, but that trust has been built," Bure said. "And I know that because I trust him and I build him up and give him the respect that he would like to have within marriage that he so listens to everything that I have to say and takes my opinion very seriously. And many of the times he will sway to what I would like, even if he doesn't see eye to eye with me because he really values my opinion." http://www.tvguide.com/News/Candance...d-1075359.aspx Attached Images

01-08-2014, 02:42 PM	#2
Marvo301 I'm NOT a Blockhead! Forum Celebrity Join Date: May 17, 2002 Location: The Great White North Posts: 21,456	If they're still happily married after 17 years then they're obviously doing something right! God bless them!
	__________________ Only a life lived for others is worth living. Albert Einstein A life isn't worth living unless it has impact on other lives. Jackie Robinson Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. Benjamin Franklin

01-09-2014, 07:00 AM	#8
Ant-Lox Cloud Watcher Senior Member Join Date: Feb 18, 2004 Location: Philadelphia, PA Posts: 1,824	It has worked for them, and she shows no signs of being abused, they'll last forever.
	__________________ Currently Watching: Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee Sports Allegiances Philadelphia 76ers Philadelphia Flyers Philadelphia Phillies Philadelphia Eagles Detroit Red Wings New York Football Giants

12-03-2014, 07:49 PM	#14
Blackout Sart Bimpson Senior Member Join Date: Jan 13, 2003 Location: where the sun rises Posts: 2,235	lmao wtf
	__________________ MOHRIOR

01-09-2014, 02:46 AM	#4
Wawwie Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 26, 2006 Location: New York Posts: 14,376	Sounds more like a parent/child relationship.

01-09-2014, 04:05 AM	#5
IllinoisTVFan Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 22, 2011 Location: South of Chicago Posts: 4,072	While I believe in a marriage one is the leader I do not believe it is always the husband. Some women are dominant, I am one. This whole "the man makes the final decision" does not sit well with me and I am a very devout Catholic. One has to remember the times when the Bible was written and how women in general had little rights. However if it works for them, good for them. Everyone needs to find what works for them.

02-23-2014, 03:45 AM	#10
arsensson84 Member Occasional Poster Join Date: Feb 22, 2014 Location: Rijeka, Croatia Posts: 10	Typical example of a christian woman who has no backbone to stand up for herself if she thinks her male mate's decisions are wrong, but she will rather let him always have his way. She should pull herself together and act as an equal to him, not his subordinate...

02-23-2014, 02:07 PM	#11
bliss THAT GIRL Senior Member Join Date: Apr 26, 2009 Posts: 1,000	What is this the 1950's.

12-03-2014, 02:02 AM	#12
TMC Member Forum Idol Join Date: Jan 09, 2001 Posts: 126,332	Candace and I hate to say this, strikes me as a very pious, holler-than-thou person (especially when she was on Dancing with the Stars). I wouldn't be surprised if she was "brainwashed" by her big brother Kirk. It seems like Candace is able to get away w/ more stuff than Kirk because she isn't as "insensitive" when sharing her beliefs (plus Candace at the peak of her Full House notoriety wasn't exactly as big of a star as Kirk was when he was on Growing Pains)