EVERY Episode of Malcolm in the Middle - RANKED!

[TMC]

I review and rank every episode of Malcolm in the Middle.

Yes, it really does cover every episode and every season of this show.

Yes, I am very tired now.

Season 1:

• 0:56 - Pilot
  
• 3:52 - Red Dress
  
• 6:12 - Home Alone 4
  
• 7:07 - Shame
  
• 7:46 - Malcolm Babysits
  
• 9:34 - Sleepover
  
• 10:41 - Francis Escapes
  
• 11:59 - Krelboyne Picnic
  
• 13:32 - Lois Vs. Evil
  
• 14:49 - Stock Car Races
  
• 16:08 - Funeral
  
• 17:21 - Cheerleader
  
• 18:18 - Roller Skates
  
• 18:41 - Bots and the Bees
  
• 19:45 - Smunday
  
• 20:22 - Waterpark (S1 Finale)

Season 2:

• 23:16 - Traffic
  
• 27:56 - Approximately
  
• 29:53 - Lois' Birthday
  
• 32:33 - Dinner Out
  
• 33:52 - Vacation/Casino
  
• 34:55 - Convention
  
• 35:41 - Robbery
  
• 36:51 - Therapy
  
• 37:54 - High School Play
  
• 38:45 - The Bully
  
• 39:32 - Old Mrs Old [The Malcolm joyride episode]
  
• 42:20 - Krelboyne Girl
  
• 44:28 - New Neighbors
  
• 45:18 - Hal Quits
  
• 46:51 - Grandparents
  
• 48:27 - Traffic Ticket
  
• 50:29 - Surgery
  
• 51:16 - Reese Cooks
  
• 52:42 - Tutoring Reese
  
• 53:57 - Bowling
  
• 56:06 - Malcolm Vs Reese
  
• 57:31 - Mini-Bike
  
• 58:32 - Carnival
  
• 59:14 - Evacuation
  
• 1:01:12 - Flashback [Season 2 finale]

Season 3:

• 1:02:16 - House Boat
  
• 1:03:24 - Emancipation
  
• 1:06:02 - Book Club
  
• 1:07:23 - Malcolm's Girlfriend
  
• 1:08:27 - Charity
  
• 1:10:47 - Health Scare
  
• 1:12:53 - Christmas [The Grandma Christmas Episode]
  
• 1:15:40 - Poker
  
• 1:16:46 - Reese's Job
  
• 1:17:48 - Lois' Makeover [The future is now, old man episode]
  
• 1:20:13 - Company Picnic Pt. 1 & 2
  
• 1:24:41 - Reese Drives
  
• 1:25:22 - Cynthia's Back
  
• 1:26:51 - Hal's Birthday
  
• 1:30:06 - Hal Coaches
  
• 1:31:28 - Dewey's Dog
  
• 1:33:50 - Poker #2
  
• 1:34:56 - Clip Show
  
• 1:35:32 - Jury Duty
  
• 1:36:35 - Cliques
  
• 1:38:07 - The Monkey [Season 3 Finale]

Season 4:

• 1:40:07 - Zoo
  
• 1:42:16 - Humiliation
  
• 1:45:00 - Family Reunion
  
• 1:47:23 - Stupid Girl
  
• 1:49:09 - Forward Backwards
  
• 1:52:24 - Forbidden Girlfriend
  
• 1:54:02 - Malcolm Holds his Tongue
  
• 1:55:38 - Boys at Ranch
  
• 1:56:52 - Grandma Sues
  
• 1:58:22 - If Boys Were Girls
  
• 2:01:07 - Long Drive
  
• 2:02:37 - Kicked Out
  
• 2:04:21 - Stereo Store
  
• 2:06:56 - Hal's Friend
  
• 2:09:09 - Garage Sale
  
• 2:10:19 - Academic Octlathon
  
• 2:11:46 - Clip Show II
  
• 2:12:32 - Reese's Party
  
• 2:13:56 - Future Malcolm
  
• 2:15:18 - Baby (Part 1)
  
• 2:19:10 Baby (Part 2)
  
• 2:21:08 - Day Care [Season 4 Finale]

Season 5:

• 2:22:49 – Vegas
  
• 2:24:30 – Baby
  
• 2:26:33 – Goodbye Kitty
  
• 2:28:20 -Thanksgiving
  
• 2:30:06 – Malcolm Films Reese
  
• 2:31:45 – Malcolm’s Job
  
• 2:33:24 – Christmas Tree (The Christmas episode where Hal buys a ton of Christmas Trees to sell for a profit)
  
• 2:35:31 – Block Party
  
• 2:36:54 – Dirty Magazine
  
• 2:39:20 – Hot Tub
  
• 2:41:05 – Ida’s Boyfriend
  
• 2:43:18 – Softball
  
• 2:44:23 – Lois’ Sister
  
• 2:46:06 – Malcolm Dates a Family
  
• 2:48:17 – Reese’s Apartment
  
• 2:50:44 – Malcolm Visits College
  
• 2:51:31 – Polly in the Middle
  
• 2:54:49 – Experiment
  
• 2:56:01 – Dewey’s Special Class
  
• 2:58:21 – Victor’s Other Family
  
• 2:59:46 – Reese Joins the Army [Pt. 1 & 2 – Season 5 Finale]

Season 6:

• 3:02:26 – Reese Comes Home
  
• 3:04:38 – Busey’s Run Away
  
• 3:07:29 – Standee [The Malcolm vs Lois on the beer cardboard sign]
  
• 3:09:41 – Pearl Harbor
  
• 3:11:19 – Kitty’s Back
  
• 3:13:39 – Hal’s Christmas Gift (Depressing episode where they make gifts and Hal lies to the family and takes them on an overly long trip to conceal it. Lois Road Rage episode too)
  
• 3:15:28 – Hal Sleepwalks
  
• 3:17:40 – Lois Battles Jamie
  
• 3:19:30 – Malcolm’s Car
  
• 3:20:42 – Billboard
  
• 3:22:58 – Opera
  
• 3:24:44 – Living Will
  
• 3:26:08 – Tiki Lounge
  
• 3:28:11 – Chad’s Sleepover
  
• 3:30:19 – No Motorcycles [The Hal and Francis episode where they go on a trip]
  
• 3:33:07 – Butterflies
  
• 3:34:43 – Ida’s Dance
  
• 3:37:33 – Motivational Speaker
  
• 3:39:08 – Stilts
  
• 3:41:10 – Busey’s Take a Hostage
  
• 3:42:01 – Mrs Tri-County [The Lois contest episode – Season 6 Finale]

Season 7:

• 3:44:27 – Burning Man
  
• 3:46:36 – Health Insurance
  
• 3:47:51 – Reese Vs Stevie
  
• 3:49:37 – Halloween
  
• 3:52:14 – Jessica Stays Over
  
• 3:55:24 – Secret Boyfriend
  
• 3:56:54 – Blackout
  
• 3:59:02 – Army Buddy
  
• 4:00:27 – Malcolm Defends Reese
  
• 4:02:03 – Malcolm’s Money
  
• 4:03:28 – Bride of Ida
  
• 4:05:33 – College Recruiters
  
• 4:07:21 – Mono
  
• 4:08:45 – Hal Grieves
  
• 4:10:37 – A.A.
  
• 4:12:30 – Lois Strikes Back
  
• 4:14:29 – Hal’s Dentist
  
• 4:16:33 – Bomb Shelter
  
• 4:18:46 – Stevie in the Hospital
  
• 4:20:43 – Cattle Court
  
• 4:23:07 – Morp
  
• 4:25:08 – Graduation [Series Finale]

[TMC]

Chapters

• 00:00:00 Intro
• 00:01:15 Season 1
• 00:09:00 Season 2
• 00:19:18 Season 3
• 00:27:42 Season 4
• 00:36:29 Season 5
• 00:47:00 Season 6
• 00:58:24 Season 7
• 01:09:16 Outro & Ranking

[TMC]

The 10 Best 'Malcolm in the Middle' Episodes, Ranked

Life is unfair...

[Reinhold_Weege]

My favorite scene from Malcolm in the Middle: Hal was in court defending himself from the workplace embezzlement charges and Malcolm provides the proof to exonerate him. You would think Lois would have been happy her husband was acquitted but instead she was pissed that he never went to work on Fridays. What a great way to subvert expectations!!!