Post your favorite quotes here - Page 10 - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Ohio8 · 04-26-2022, 10:55 PM

Barbara Billingsley: "We're the sitcom moms welcome wagon."

Alley Mills: "Elizabeth Montgomery is shocked. And she's a witch."

Pat Crowley: "... we're about as mad as h-e-double hockeysticks. Excuse my French."

A.M.: (to Roseanne)"You're supposed to teach your children valuable lessons."

B.B.: "Could someone please get me a cold towel?"

B.B.: "That was just a rumor; Beaver's alive!"

B.B.: "Why, I'd make out with a chick for that kind of money."

BestTVever · 04-27-2022, 07:25 AM

If we are going to be successful in business we're gonna have to steal the idea from somebody

AB · 04-27-2022, 08:37 PM

Roseanne:

MA · 07-02-2022, 07:49 AM

Dan and Roseanne:

Ohio8 · 08-03-2022, 08:37 PM

Roseanne: (narrating)"I lost Dan last year when he had his heart attack."

Ohio8 · 08-03-2022, 10:25 PM

(First line of the series.)
Becky: (on phone)"I'm serious. He'll still like you."

Ohio8 · 10-12-2022, 06:00 PM

Roseanne: (to Dan)"Come on, get up. We gotta earn a living."

Roseanne: (to D.J.)"All right, Rembrandt, go wake up your sisters."

principehomura · 10-23-2022, 12:44 PM

Roseanne: "You two are having sex"
Darlene: "We are? David, why didn't you tell me? I'd have put my book down"
Roseanne: "Well, I would expect to be lied to by you, young lady... But you! I never even saw it coming, with those puppy-dog eyes and that sad clown hair."
Darlene: "What, did D.J. tell you?"
Roseanne: "I don't plan to reveal my source, but suffice it to say, that your car was seen yesterday parked outside of the Green Lantern Motel."
Darlene: "It was not."
Roseanne: "Are you calling Jackie a liar?"
David: "I was at a movie yesterday afternoon."
Roseanne: "Don't even start with me David. We take you into this house and treat you
like one of our own kids, and then you turn around and treat us like you're one of our own kids!"
Darlene: "Mom, leave him alone. I was at the motel... but not with David..."

Randomly watched this clip of s07e02, and my God!
To think that the show was already past its prime and was in its waning phase, yet the whole scene is on a quality level that the actual Conners season could never even dream to achieve.
How the scene is set-up, how every character involved is perfectly encapsulated by a few line of dialogues, the way the actors deliver their lines and their perfect timing, the high quality comedy and its balance with drama.
Pure gold.

Ohio8 · 10-29-2022, 10:22 PM

Jackie: "Well, look at you two. Straight (out of) the pages of G.Q. and Vogue."

Cop: "You do do not want to be wrong about death."

Jackie: "One pound of bak, two pounds of lava."

Darlene: "He died in our house?!"

Dan: "... I ain't touchin' that refrigerator 'til Willie Loman's out of here."

Dan: (to Roseanne)"I hate you and everything you stand for."

Becky: "A guy shouldn't have to live his whole life just to be buried as 'John Doe'."

Ohio8 · 10-30-2022, 06:35 PM

Dan: "Hey! You drink the Big Gulp, you suffer the consequences."

Dan: "You don't eat the face. You mount it on the wall as a tribute."

D.J.: "Cool! I get to name the place."

Molly: "Darlene, what do you have against me?"
Darlene: "Nothing!"

Darlene: "You don't understand here, Molly. This is the most normal thing he's ever done."

Ohio8 · 01-22-2023, 12:28 AM

Bev: (enters) "...her great-grandmother is here!"
Jackie: "Don't worry; she's been warned."

Roseanne: "Hey, hey, hey! One at a time! You people are scary enough individually."

Roseanne: "Everyone wonders where creative people get their inspiration. Actually, I found it's all around you."

Roseanne: "Oh, yeah. And she's nuts."

(Last lines of the series.)
Roseanne: "And most important, I learned that God does exist. He and or She is right inside you; underneath the pain, the sorrow, and the shame. I think I'll be a lot better now this book is done."

Ohio8 · 04-05-2023, 06:33 PM

Miss Carter: (to Roseanne)"Your daughter barks."
Roseanne: "Our whole family barks."

Ohio8 · 04-17-2023, 07:23 PM

Darlene: "I'm never shopping again on Christmas Eve."

Mary: "Have a freakin' white Christmas."

Roseanne: "You're not leavin' me alone with the Judds tonight, Jackie."

Dan: "Man I hate cookin'."

Darlene: (to David)"I basically chose you over death."

Bev: "...25 years of your husband's cheating tends to shake your faith."

Bev: "Everyone knows yo string lights from the top!"

Barbara Healy: "Dragging Conner trash over here, another slut just like her sister."

Dan: "That explains my windshield compass."

Roseanne: "See, Mom? I told you there's a God."

MA · 05-19-2023, 05:40 PM

Roseanne Conner: [Mark's reading his homework] Oh, well, I hate to ruin the end of it for ya, Mark, but he *eats* the green eggs and ham.

04-26-2022, 10:55 PM	#136
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Barbara Billingsley: "We're the sitcom moms welcome wagon." Alley Mills: "Elizabeth Montgomery is shocked. And she's a witch." Pat Crowley: "... we're about as mad as h-e-double hockeysticks. Excuse my French." A.M.: (to Roseanne)"You're supposed to teach your children valuable lessons." B.B.: "Could someone please get me a cold towel?" B.B.: "That was just a rumor; Beaver's alive!" B.B.: "Why, I'd make out with a chick for that kind of money."
	__________________ "Shorter of breath and one day closer to death." -- Pink Floyd

04-27-2022, 08:37 PM	#138
AB Member Eternal Member Forum Icon Join Date: Dec 26, 2006 Location: The South Posts: 59,426	Roseanne: Attached Images

07-02-2022, 07:49 AM	#139
MA Member Moderator Forum Idol Join Date: May 20, 2017 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 127,083	Dan and Roseanne:
	__________________ ~-Mikaela-~

10-23-2022, 12:44 PM	#143
principehomura Member Forum Regular Join Date: May 24, 2010 Location: SEA, Napa, Lanford, NY \| Rome (WI), Coeur d'Coeurs, Stars Hollow, Sunnydale \| Twin Peaks, BAL, Deadwood, WA \| Tardis, Galactica Posts: 757	Roseanne: "You two are having sex" Darlene: "We are? David, why didn't you tell me? I'd have put my book down" Roseanne: "Well, I would expect to be lied to by you, young lady... But you! I never even saw it coming, with those puppy-dog eyes and that sad clown hair." Darlene: "What, did D.J. tell you?" Roseanne: "I don't plan to reveal my source, but suffice it to say, that your car was seen yesterday parked outside of the Green Lantern Motel." Darlene: "It was not." Roseanne: "Are you calling Jackie a liar?" David: "I was at a movie yesterday afternoon." Roseanne: "Don't even start with me David. We take you into this house and treat you like one of our own kids, and then you turn around and treat us like you're one of our own kids!" Darlene: "Mom, leave him alone. I was at the motel... but not with David..." Randomly watched this clip of s07e02, and my God! To think that the show was already past its prime and was in its waning phase, yet the whole scene is on a quality level that the actual Conners season could never even dream to achieve. How the scene is set-up, how every character involved is perfectly encapsulated by a few line of dialogues, the way the actors deliver their lines and their perfect timing, the high quality comedy and its balance with drama. Pure gold.
	__________________ Frasier, Mom, Roseanne, The Conners Picket Fences, Pushing Daisies, Buffy, Gilmore Girls Twin Peaks, The Wire, Deadwood, X-Files - Frasier, Niles and Martin Crane, Dale Cooper, Fox Mulder Christy Plunkett, Buffy Summers, Rory Gilmore, Becky Conner, Dana Scully - Roseanne Barr, David E. Kelley, David Milch, Amy Sherman, Bryan Fuller, Steven Bochco - Anna Faris, Marlee Matlin, Jane Levy, Lecy Goranson, Jennifer Esposito, Melissa J. Hart - Kelsey Grammer, David H. Pierce, Michael J. Fox

10-30-2022, 06:35 PM	#145
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Dan: "Hey! You drink the Big Gulp, you suffer the consequences." Dan: "You don't eat the face. You mount it on the wall as a tribute." D.J.: "Cool! I get to name the place." Molly: "Darlene, what do you have against me?" Darlene: "Nothing!" Darlene: "You don't understand here, Molly. This is the most normal thing he's ever done."
	Last edited by Ohio8; 04-06-2023 at 06:54 PM.

04-27-2022, 07:25 AM	#137
BestTVever Member Senior Member Join Date: Jan 29, 2021 Location: Miami Posts: 1,874	If we are going to be successful in business we're gonna have to steal the idea from somebody

08-03-2022, 08:37 PM	#140
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Roseanne: (narrating)"I lost Dan last year when he had his heart attack."

08-03-2022, 10:25 PM	#141
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	(First line of the series.) Becky: (on phone)"I'm serious. He'll still like you."

10-12-2022, 06:00 PM	#142
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Roseanne: (to Dan)"Come on, get up. We gotta earn a living." Roseanne: (to D.J.)"All right, Rembrandt, go wake up your sisters."

10-29-2022, 10:22 PM	#144
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Jackie: "Well, look at you two. Straight (out of) the pages of G.Q. and Vogue." Cop: "You do do not want to be wrong about death." Jackie: "One pound of bak, two pounds of lava." Darlene: "He died in our house?!" Dan: "... I ain't touchin' that refrigerator 'til Willie Loman's out of here." Dan: (to Roseanne)"I hate you and everything you stand for." Becky: "A guy shouldn't have to live his whole life just to be buried as 'John Doe'."

01-22-2023, 12:28 AM	#146
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Bev: (enters) "...her great-grandmother is here!" Jackie: "Don't worry; she's been warned." Roseanne: "Hey, hey, hey! One at a time! You people are scary enough individually." Roseanne: "Everyone wonders where creative people get their inspiration. Actually, I found it's all around you." Roseanne: "Oh, yeah. And she's nuts." (Last lines of the series.) Roseanne: "And most important, I learned that God does exist. He and or She is right inside you; underneath the pain, the sorrow, and the shame. I think I'll be a lot better now this book is done."

04-05-2023, 06:33 PM	#147
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Miss Carter: (to Roseanne)"Your daughter barks." Roseanne: "Our whole family barks."

04-17-2023, 07:23 PM	#148
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,886	Darlene: "I'm never shopping again on Christmas Eve." Mary: "Have a freakin' white Christmas." Roseanne: "You're not leavin' me alone with the Judds tonight, Jackie." Dan: "Man I hate cookin'." Darlene: (to David)"I basically chose you over death." Bev: "...25 years of your husband's cheating tends to shake your faith." Bev: "Everyone knows yo string lights from the top!" Barbara Healy: "Dragging Conner trash over here, another slut just like her sister." Dan: "That explains my windshield compass." Roseanne: "See, Mom? I told you there's a God."

05-19-2023, 05:40 PM	#149
MA Member Moderator Forum Idol Join Date: May 20, 2017 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 127,083	Roseanne Conner: [Mark's reading his homework] Oh, well, I hate to ruin the end of it for ya, Mark, but he eats the green eggs and ham.