TD goes Jerry Springer - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

CD DeLorenzo · 07-08-2003, 05:13 PM

I just remembered this. I made it at some page... and it was fun, so I thought maybe ya'll like too...

created at http://www.shrineofinsanity.com/inte...s/slinger1.htm

****************************************************

Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!

Jerry: Tonight on the Jerry Springer show we have a particularly interesting episode! CD is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend of hers Jinny. So everyone please put your hands together for CD!

Jerry: Okay, now CD you're here to talk about someone aren't you?

CD: Yes.

Jerry: And what is this other persons name?

CD: Nate.

The crowd SQUEALS with delight.

Jerry: Okay, okay, well Nate, is actually here tonight -

The crowd SQUEALS.

Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you CD, because as it happens there is someone else here to see YOU! So let's bring out... Kate!

CD: What the HELL!!!

Out of nowhere CD pulls out a gun. Kate reaches for the loveseat. Out of the shadows Paul appears.

Paul: Wait everybody wait!

Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First tell us why you're here Kate.

Kate: Because I saw CD and Paul making out at Alcatraz!

The crowd goes absolutely INSANE.

Paul: That's a lie! I was home watching JAG!

Jerry: (raising his hands) Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here...what exactly IS the problem Kate?

Kate: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Jinny who has recently become engaged to Paul.

The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement.

Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Jinny out here because CD had something that she needed to tell her anyway about... Nate that's right!

Jinny: (enters onto stage and saunters over towards you) What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Nate! You know how I feel about Nate!.

Paul: (screams) What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Nate!

Jinny: Because I knew that I could never have Nate. But CD promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings!

Paul: What about respect for MY feelings!

Kate walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Jinny.

Kate: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me.

Again the crowd SQUEALS.

Paul: Oh my God! Are you SICK!

Paul runs across the room and wraps his arms around CD tightly.

Paul: CD take me away from all of this!

CD: You see? That's the thing...I'm...well, I'm married...

The crowd does its bit.

Paul: Married?

CD nods.

Paul: Who the hell are you married to? When...when did this happen? I don't understand!

CD: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Nate.

Jinny: (screaming) WHAT!!!

Jerry: (grinning widely, makes an enquiry) So...did you have a nice wedding night?

Nate: (stepping back out onto center stage) Well we had sex 739 times if that's what you mean.

The crowd squeals.

Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight... CD is married to Nate who Jinny has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Jinny has recently become engaged to Paul who was recently spotted kissing CD at Alcatraz. Now on top of this Kate has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Jinny.

Nate: That's right Jerry.

Jerry: (looking sternly into the camera) It is times like these that one has to wonder, whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks it's been great but for now...it's goodnight.

Queue cheesy background music and fade to black.

*Nancy Mckeon* · 07-08-2003, 05:28 PM

omg! lol

im still laughing! need more!

consentida · 07-08-2003, 06:34 PM

Ah...Thats hilarious.

MovieHuntress17 · 07-09-2003, 10:23 AM

That was hilarious!!

JDS84 · 07-12-2003, 09:46 PM

That was very funny

07-08-2003, 05:13 PM	#1
CD DeLorenzo TRACEY FOREVER!!! Senior Member Join Date: Jun 20, 2003 Location: I don't wanna talk if it makes you feel sad Posts: 2,376	TD goes Jerry Springer I just remembered this. I made it at some page... and it was fun, so I thought maybe ya'll like too... created at http://www.shrineofinsanity.com/inte...s/slinger1.htm **************************************************** Jerry! Jerry! Jerry! Jerry: Tonight on the Jerry Springer show we have a particularly interesting episode! CD is here to finally confess something to a long-time friend of hers Jinny. So everyone please put your hands together for CD! Jerry: Okay, now CD you're here to talk about someone aren't you? CD: Yes. Jerry: And what is this other persons name? CD: Nate. The crowd SQUEALS with delight. Jerry: Okay, okay, well Nate, is actually here tonight - The crowd SQUEALS. Jerry: But first we have a surprise for you CD, because as it happens there is someone else here to see YOU! So let's bring out... Kate! CD: What the HELL!!! Out of nowhere CD pulls out a gun. Kate reaches for the loveseat. Out of the shadows Paul appears. Paul: Wait everybody wait! Jerry: Yes, everybody let's just calm down for a moment here. First tell us why you're here Kate. Kate: Because I saw CD and Paul making out at Alcatraz! The crowd goes absolutely INSANE. Paul: That's a lie! I was home watching JAG! Jerry: (raising his hands) Hold on, hold on, I'm missing the problem here...what exactly IS the problem Kate? Kate: Because I've recently been taking part in a sexual relationship with Jinny who has recently become engaged to Paul. The crowd hollers, screams and whoops in an orchestra of orgasmic excitement. Jerry: Okay, okay. Well why don't we bring Jinny out here because CD had something that she needed to tell her anyway about... Nate that's right! Jinny: (enters onto stage and saunters over towards you) What's the deal? I saw you outside getting it on with Nate! You know how I feel about Nate!. Paul: (screams) What? Why the hell did you ask me to marry you if you're in love with Nate! Jinny: Because I knew that I could never have Nate. But CD promised me that they'd never hook up out of respect for my feelings! Paul: What about respect for MY feelings! Kate walks suddenly across the stage, embracing Jinny. Kate: Don't worry baby, you don't need any of them now that you have me. Again the crowd SQUEALS. Paul: Oh my God! Are you SICK! Paul runs across the room and wraps his arms around CD tightly. Paul: CD take me away from all of this! CD: You see? That's the thing...I'm...well, I'm married... The crowd does its bit. Paul: Married? CD nods. Paul: Who the hell are you married to? When...when did this happen? I don't understand! CD: The other day. In Vegas. I'm married to Nate. Jinny: (screaming) WHAT!!! Jerry: (grinning widely, makes an enquiry) So...did you have a nice wedding night? Nate: (stepping back out onto center stage) Well we had sex 739 times if that's what you mean. The crowd squeals. Jerry: Okay, okay. So let me get this all straight... CD is married to Nate who Jinny has secretly been in love with for years and years. Now Jinny has recently become engaged to Paul who was recently spotted kissing CD at Alcatraz. Now on top of this Kate has just admitted to being in a sexual relationship with Jinny. Nate: That's right Jerry. Jerry: (looking sternly into the camera) It is times like these that one has to wonder, whether or not these people are aware that they are quite clinically insane. Perhaps we should be spending more on psychiatric health funds in this country, perhaps we should just ban Vegas to cut down on impulse marriages. Perhaps I should get a new job. Thanks for watching folks it's been great but for now...it's goodnight. Queue cheesy background music and fade to black.
	__________________ RIP Amadeus *For you it's goodbye, for me it's to cry...* http://www.livejournal.com/users/cd_delorenzo/ http://www.livejournal.com/users/sfpd_cd/ - join the LJ TD RPG

07-08-2003, 05:28 PM	#2
Nancy Mckeon ~Amy Lee Fan~ Forum Regular Join Date: May 22, 2003 Location: my own crazy world... Posts: 878	omg! lol im still laughing! need more!
	__________________ Jenn Goodnight, Sleep tight, No more tears. In the morning, Ill be here, And when we say goodnight Dry your eyes. Because we said goodnight, not goodbye We said goodnight, not goodbye ~ Evanescence~

07-08-2003, 06:34 PM	#3
consentida oh, you pretty things Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 21, 2002 Location: New York Posts: 3,841	Ah...Thats hilarious.
	Last edited by consentida; 07-09-2003 at 11:30 AM.

07-09-2003, 10:23 AM	#4
MovieHuntress17 #1 Actress ever Forum Regular Join Date: Oct 28, 2002 Location: "Over yonder" Posts: 886	That was hilarious!!
	__________________ Howdy! :-D Stacy:Sorry to bother you. Cap:You've still got time to reconsider. Crazy is normal,and Normal is crazy! Optimism can be a real b!t(h sometimes. "I've discovered the hardest discovery to make is who you are."-Bonnie Bedelia. "It's Not reaching your dreams that counts. It's going towards them."-Cher Somebody once said(I don't remember who) "I know that God won't give me more then I can handle...I just wish he didn't trust me so much." <- - I liked that. God Bless EVERYONE ~Emma~

07-12-2003, 09:46 PM	#5
JDS84 Member Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Dec 11, 2001 Location: My Old Kentucky Home Posts: 3,377	That was very funny
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