One-Liners - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Kristen · 05-21-2003, 05:42 PM

This thread has been quite successful over at TV Land's board, so I thought it might work here too. We need to get some conversation going around here! Does anybody have any favorite one-liners and quotes from TDVDS they wanna share?

Kristen
PS--In case anybody doesn't watch Lifetime, Our Mary will be recieving an award tomorrow night at Lifetime's Achievement Awards! It's being shown on Lifetime at 10 tomorrow night! Can't wait!

Lolac · 05-22-2003, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kristen
This thread has been quite successful over at TV Land's board, so I thought it might work here too. We need to get some conversation going around here! Does anybody have any favorite one-liners and quotes from TDVDS they wanna share?

Kristen

From Episode 117 "Girls Will Be Boys":

Laura: That would make him a sissy. Why would a boy say he was a sissy on purpose?

Rob:A lot of guys in the army tried it.

Lolac

SawgrassSteve · 05-22-2003, 10:39 AM

Great topic, Kristen!
For die-hard fans like us, giving just one favorite is going to be a toughy, so I'll drop them in from time to time as they occur to me.
Here's one from episode #53, "Give Me Your Walls!"
Rob to Laura:
"Now, from here on out, will you try to remember that I'm the one who wears the pants in this family? (He looks down at her Capris) Well, the important pants, anyway."

Steve

Christina E · 05-22-2003, 10:54 AM

I know I have a lot of favorites, but one always comes to mind first.

Laura: I've worked like a horse...even a horse gets a lump of sugar.

That one never fails to crack me up

Christina

Lolac · 05-22-2003, 01:31 PM

From Episode 130 "The Ugliest Dog in the World":
Buddy: "Corned Beef and milk? That ain't kosher!"

From Episode 13 "Empress Carlotta's Necklace":
Millie: "Wear it to a bad neighborhood. Maybe you'll get held up by a thief with bad taste."

Lolac

Kristen · 05-22-2003, 02:06 PM

I know this is more of a visual joke than a verbal one, but what about the moment in "Where Did I Come From?" when Rob drops the phone down his (Buddy's) pants and then says, "Don't hang up!"

That line never fails to crack me up!!

Kristen

Commander Benson · 05-23-2003, 05:38 PM

Certainly, the funniest line to ever be heard on television:

"Hi! We're the Peters."

Commander Benson

Lolac · 05-23-2003, 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Commander Benson
Certainly, the funniest line to ever be heard on television:

"Hi! We're the Peters."

Commander Benson

LOL! So true! And the lines right after that:

Rob: "Why didn't you tell me on the phone?"
Mr. Peters: "And miss the expression on your face?"

That is one of my favorite episodes!

Lolac

SawgrassSteve · 05-25-2003, 02:07 PM

From episode #9, "My Blonde-Haired Brunette," when Millie denies to Rob that they're dying Laura's hair blonde,
"I suppose it's turning by itself?"

Steve

Lolac · 05-25-2003, 07:15 PM

From the episode "The Bottom of Mel Cooley's Heart:"

Alan Brady to Rob: "So you really want Mel back, Mr. Christian?"

Buddy: "So does Mr. Jewish."

Lolac

SawgrassSteve · 05-25-2003, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Lolac
Buddy: "So does Mr. Jewish."

Lolac

Lolac of Twilo!
I was gonna post that one (as soon as I remembered it)! It's one of my favorites!

Steve

Samme · 05-28-2003, 02:08 PM

I think it's kinda unusual in there
doesn't seem to be that many one
liners that are quotable from
the show. Although I like the
ones posted. The jokes came from
character. I hate the bit of set
up line and joke over and over
in sitcoms. But it does throw me
that in the Andy Griffith Show
everything also came from character
and there are a seemingly endless
supply of phrases and lines that
are hilarious to remember. Was
DVD just a more gentle comedy?
Anyway I always liked Rob's line
in "The Ugliest Dog in the World"
where he's gonna set Horrible free
and Laura says "By himself?" and
Rob says "If David Janssen can do
it. He can do it". And how he knows
there's a conspiracy when he tries
to report his UFO. "I know I heard
more than one person laughing."
Or when Sally encourages him when
he's gonna tell off the chorus girl.
Just remember, Rob, you keep that
ole fire in the eye. You keep that
chin up. Rob: Don't worry. Sally:
(nods to Buddy) He'll chicken.
Anybody feel free to correct these
quotes. Probably not exact.

SawgrassSteve · 05-28-2003, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Samme
And how he knows
there's a conspiracy when he tries
to report his UFO. "I know I heard
more than one person laughing."

Samme,
I love that one too! I'm laughing right now!

Steve

Lolac · 05-29-2003, 12:11 PM

From "The Plots Thicken,"

Sally: Buddy, if you say one more thing, I'll kill you.

Buddy: "Please, not today, we're defrosting!"

Lolac (hoping you remember the set-up lines to that one!)

Janice · 06-01-2003, 01:26 AM

I forget the setup, but I think Mel is quitting or something and Buddy says to him...something along the lines of:

"You can't leave now. I've got a trunkload of baldie jokes I haven't used yet."

05-21-2003, 05:42 PM	#1
Kristen Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 17, 2000 Location: New York, USA Posts: 4,042	One-Liners This thread has been quite successful over at TV Land's board, so I thought it might work here too. We need to get some conversation going around here! Does anybody have any favorite one-liners and quotes from TDVDS they wanna share? Kristen PS--In case anybody doesn't watch Lifetime, Our Mary will be recieving an award tomorrow night at Lifetime's Achievement Awards! It's being shown on Lifetime at 10 tomorrow night! Can't wait!
	__________________ Twitter \| Facebook \| Swagbucks \| Fanfiction Avatar Credit: Leigh Ann

05-22-2003, 10:39 AM	#3
SawgrassSteve Loyal Worshipper Senior Member Join Date: Mar 04, 2002 Location: Chicago, IL Posts: 1,423	Great topic, Kristen! For die-hard fans like us, giving just one favorite is going to be a toughy, so I'll drop them in from time to time as they occur to me. Here's one from episode #53, "Give Me Your Walls!" Rob to Laura: "Now, from here on out, will you try to remember that I'm the one who wears the pants in this family? (He looks down at her Capris) Well, the important pants, anyway." Steve
	__________________ The Cult Of Laura

05-22-2003, 10:54 AM	#4
Christina E God Bless America Frequent Poster Join Date: Apr 10, 2001 Location: 148 Bonnie Meadow Road Posts: 265	I know I have a lot of favorites, but one always comes to mind first. Laura: I've worked like a horse...even a horse gets a lump of sugar. That one never fails to crack me up Christina

05-22-2003, 01:31 PM	#5
Lolac Dolce far niente, Carissima! Senior Member Join Date: Jan 02, 2003 Location: Fairfax Station, VA Posts: 1,487	From Episode 130 "The Ugliest Dog in the World": Buddy: "Corned Beef and milk? That ain't kosher!" From Episode 13 "Empress Carlotta's Necklace": Millie: "Wear it to a bad neighborhood. Maybe you'll get held up by a thief with bad taste." Lolac

05-22-2003, 02:06 PM	#6
Kristen Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Jul 17, 2000 Location: New York, USA Posts: 4,042	I know this is more of a visual joke than a verbal one, but what about the moment in "Where Did I Come From?" when Rob drops the phone down his (Buddy's) pants and then says, "Don't hang up!" That line never fails to crack me up!! Kristen

05-23-2003, 05:38 PM	#7
Commander Benson Member Occasional Poster Join Date: Jan 15, 2002 Posts: 55	Certainly, the funniest line to ever be heard on television: "Hi! We're the Peters." Commander Benson

05-25-2003, 02:07 PM	#9
SawgrassSteve Loyal Worshipper Senior Member Join Date: Mar 04, 2002 Location: Chicago, IL Posts: 1,423	From episode #9, "My Blonde-Haired Brunette," when Millie denies to Rob that they're dying Laura's hair blonde, "I suppose it's turning by itself?" Steve

05-25-2003, 07:15 PM	#10
Lolac Dolce far niente, Carissima! Senior Member Join Date: Jan 02, 2003 Location: Fairfax Station, VA Posts: 1,487	From the episode "The Bottom of Mel Cooley's Heart:" Alan Brady to Rob: "So you really want Mel back, Mr. Christian?" Buddy: "So does Mr. Jewish." Lolac

05-28-2003, 02:08 PM	#12
Samme Member Forum Regular Join Date: Dec 01, 2001 Posts: 679	I think it's kinda unusual in there doesn't seem to be that many one liners that are quotable from the show. Although I like the ones posted. The jokes came from character. I hate the bit of set up line and joke over and over in sitcoms. But it does throw me that in the Andy Griffith Show everything also came from character and there are a seemingly endless supply of phrases and lines that are hilarious to remember. Was DVD just a more gentle comedy? Anyway I always liked Rob's line in "The Ugliest Dog in the World" where he's gonna set Horrible free and Laura says "By himself?" and Rob says "If David Janssen can do it. He can do it". And how he knows there's a conspiracy when he tries to report his UFO. "I know I heard more than one person laughing." Or when Sally encourages him when he's gonna tell off the chorus girl. Just remember, Rob, you keep that ole fire in the eye. You keep that chin up. Rob: Don't worry. Sally: (nods to Buddy) He'll chicken. Anybody feel free to correct these quotes. Probably not exact.

05-29-2003, 12:11 PM	#14
Lolac Dolce far niente, Carissima! Senior Member Join Date: Jan 02, 2003 Location: Fairfax Station, VA Posts: 1,487	From "The Plots Thicken," Sally: Buddy, if you say one more thing, I'll kill you. Buddy: "Please, not today, we're defrosting!" Lolac (hoping you remember the set-up lines to that one!)

06-01-2003, 01:26 AM	#15
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	I forget the setup, but I think Mel is quitting or something and Buddy says to him...something along the lines of: "You can't leave now. I've got a trunkload of baldie jokes I haven't used yet."