'Bachelor' Gets Serious; What's That About?

[Brett Ferino]

LOS ANGELES (Zap2it.com) - The first two editions of "The Bachelor," as well as "The Bachelorette," came across as fun TV. Sure, the ultimate goal was as serious as a heart attack: finding the person you want with whom said Bachelor or Bachelorette wanted to spend the rest of his or her life.

Still, the shows were more goofy than grave. This time around, though, it's not shaping up quite that way. Maybe the women are genuinely more interested in Andrew Firestone than their counterparts were in Alex or Aaron -- no great feat there. Maybe it's the knowledge that two of the three relationships formed out of the series have failed.

Or maybe that mysterious "chemistry" that participants in the show talk so much about just isn't there this time. It's not a stretch to say that most people look to reality shows for easy-to-digest fun, and the folks on this "Bachelor" aren't as fun as in past editions.

Which is not to say that Wednesday night's (April 23) episode didn't have moments of levity. Three women get one-on-one dates based on the results of compatibility tests everyone took before the show.

Jen's helicopter phobia and her flirtation with Andy involving the word "pleasant" -- ooh -- gave us chuckles, while the apparent hinge on Andrew's mouth as he opened it to kiss her and enveloped seemingly half her face was more of a "What the ..." moment.

By the way, it's also on the date with Jen that Andrew gets personal Strike 2. In addition to being really bad at tying a necktie, he drops the knowledge on their spa date that he likes his steak well-done -- a sin on the level of asking for ketchup with your filet mignon.

The '50s-themed date with Kirsten, where they go to one of greater L.A.'s last remaining drive-in theaters to look at baby pictures of each other, is pretty uneventful, probably because it seems a foregone conclusion that she'll be getting a rose regardless.

Likewise, nothing much happens on Andrew's stay-at-home date with Anne-Michelle. It feels very first-date, which probably isn't a good sign (yes, we're foreshadowing).

The group tennis date with Tina (still Fabulous, apparently), Liz and Cristina provides the juiciest (unlike Andrew's overcooked steak) moments. First, Liz has to talk Cristina down after she goes a little nutty about not getting alone time with our boy.

"It's not fair," Cristina pouts. "If I don't get a rose, it's only because he didn't get to know me. And he'd be foolish not to get me a rose."

Tennis Hall of Famer Tracy Austin greets them for a private lesson at a posh racquet club. If any of the three women know Austin was the youngest women's champion in U.S. Open history, they keep it to themselves. Judging by their games, it's safe to say they didn't.

After some light hitting, Austin takes the role of "American Idol" guest judge, praising all three to Andrew. Then Tina takes Andrew's watch to wear herself, because it shows three different time zones and is "pimped out."

"Who wouldn't want to wear it?" she asks. We'll go with the assumption that this question is rhetorical and elect not to answer.

The sometimes-bubbly, sometimes-teary Liz, meanwhile, admits to feeling like a junior-high girl around Andrew and say she "wimped out" by not kissing him when she had the chance. "I was nervous, and he was cute," she explains.

Rose night comes, and there's some minor discussion about Tina still wearing the watch; Kirsten reminds Andrew to get it back from her. There's not a lot of suspense to the ceremony, although it's a mild surprise that group-daters Tina and Cristina get roses along with Kirsten and Jen.

Anne-Michelle is philosophical about her dismissal, while Liz cops to being "crushed."

Next week, Andrew goes to meet the families of the four remaining women. We're almost sorry Jill from "Married by America" didn't opt for this show instead; it'd be interesting to see Andrew try to deal with her dad.