THE 2002 HAWKEYE AWARDS! (part 1) - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

TJL · 12-27-2002, 08:49 PM

Good evening ladies and gentlemen! TJL here, welcoming you to the 53rd Annual Hawkeye Awards! Tonight we honor a group of truly amazing individuals who have through every fault of there own have left a lasting impression on me and a bad taste in my mouth in 2002.

Let’s sling some mud, shall we?

Worst Use Of Scissors – The Hawkeye goes to Rosie O’Donnell, with her horrible mid year ‘do that left everybody scratching their heads full of luxurious non-mangled hair.

Outstanding Use Of A Former Popstar In An Excruciating Reality Series
The Hawkeye goes to “American Idol” Thanks guys for bringing Paula Abdul back from the “where are they now” section of oblivion.

The Please For The Love Of God Make Him Stop Award goes to none other than America’s favorite Dad Michael Jackson! Yes, this freakish man-boy proved once again, that you can dress him up but can’t take him anywhere. Between his baby juggling stunts and the complete removal of his nose, wacko Jacko reached new heights of creepiness in 2002. Kudos to Mike for inspiring the greatest Internet game of this year to boot!

Outstanding Acheivement in Skankery
The Hawkeye goes to Christina Aguilera! Ah Christina, We love it all! The filthy videos, the softcore antics, the buttless pants. You made us proud!

More awards to come folks, so stay tuned...

DarleneIllyria · 12-27-2002, 09:40 PM

And I swear this is the best award show of the year.

Warm & Fuzzy · 12-27-2002, 09:44 PM

Keep it coming, man!

LucyFan · 12-27-2002, 09:52 PM

lol

AllIWantIsYourClutch · 12-27-2002, 09:56 PM

Thats funny!! Except for the last one...but the rest is funny!

Janice · 12-27-2002, 10:08 PM

You'd better have a Hawkeye for J-Lo in Part 2.

AnaheimPMWitch · 12-27-2002, 10:41 PM

FUNNY STUFF thats JUST TOOOO GOOD

and mostly true except for the Christina stuff I like Christina SHES THE only teenybopper I like COULD it be cause she song a song for Moulin Rouge?

FOLrocks1 · 12-27-2002, 10:43 PM

LOL! Those are great!

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 12-27-2002, 11:12 PM

LMAO.

ks · 12-27-2002, 11:20 PM

This is the most entertaining award show I've seen in quite some time. Keep it comin'!

ks

Ewan's My Man · 12-28-2002, 12:21 AM

~*Hannah_Lee*~ · 12-28-2002, 12:48 AM

LOL!!!!

That is hilarious!!!!

*Marilyn Monroe* · 12-28-2002, 01:05 AM

These are great! I have to agree with them all!

12-27-2002, 08:49 PM	#1
TJL Suburbanite Extrordinaire Forum Star Join Date: Dec 29, 2001 Location: New Jersey - the cradle of civilization Posts: 16,588	THE 2002 HAWKEYE AWARDS! (part 1) Good evening ladies and gentlemen! TJL here, welcoming you to the 53rd Annual Hawkeye Awards! Tonight we honor a group of truly amazing individuals who have through every fault of there own have left a lasting impression on me and a bad taste in my mouth in 2002. Let’s sling some mud, shall we? Worst Use Of Scissors – The Hawkeye goes to Rosie O’Donnell, with her horrible mid year ‘do that left everybody scratching their heads full of luxurious non-mangled hair. Outstanding Use Of A Former Popstar In An Excruciating Reality Series The Hawkeye goes to “American Idol” Thanks guys for bringing Paula Abdul back from the “where are they now” section of oblivion. The Please For The Love Of God Make Him Stop Award goes to none other than America’s favorite Dad Michael Jackson! Yes, this freakish man-boy proved once again, that you can dress him up but can’t take him anywhere. Between his baby juggling stunts and the complete removal of his nose, wacko Jacko reached new heights of creepiness in 2002. Kudos to Mike for inspiring the greatest Internet game of this year to boot! Outstanding Acheivement in Skankery The Hawkeye goes to Christina Aguilera! Ah Christina, We love it all! The filthy videos, the softcore antics, the buttless pants. You made us proud! More awards to come folks, so stay tuned...
	__________________ "I think I'll stroll up to the front to see how the shooting's going..." - Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce Read my blogs! http://centralparkamisguide.com/ http://dvdcriticscorner.com Visit me on Facebook!http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=641138880 Hey, I do the tweet thing too! http://twitter.com/TomLevier My shop of handmade items! http://www.etsy.com/shop/ColdGarageCreations

12-27-2002, 09:44 PM	#3
Warm & Fuzzy Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 02, 2001 Posts: 10,254	Keep it coming, man!
	__________________ "To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you may be the world." ~Unknown

12-27-2002, 10:08 PM	#6
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	Funny stuff... You'd better have a Hawkeye for J-Lo in Part 2.

12-27-2002, 10:41 PM	#7
AnaheimPMWitch AKA CaitlinMoore2002 Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: May 08, 2002 Location: in the Las Vegas Crime Lab hangin with Nick and Sara Posts: 4,973	FUNNY STUFF thats JUST TOOOO GOOD and mostly true except for the Christina stuff I like Christina SHES THE only teenybopper I like COULD it be cause she song a song for Moulin Rouge?
	__________________ "We're not dating , We just go to Movies"-Sara Sidle CSI "Now all I can think about is someone took my Doll and Now I want him back so I can Play with him HER Well you know what I mean"-Reggie on Becker "Just in case I'm not enough of a Freak already LETS add a Tiara"-Mia Princess Diaries

12-27-2002, 10:43 PM	#8
FOLrocks1 My favorite ladies! Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 09, 2001 Location: Ohio Posts: 4,103	LOL! Those are great!
	__________________ THE GOLDEN GIRLS! Sophia: (to Blanche) Fasten your seatbelt, slut puppie. This ain't gunna be no cakewalk. Blanche: I don't really mind Clayton being homosexual, I just don't like him dating men. Dorothy: You really haven't grasped the concept of this gay thing yet, have you? Blanche: There must be homosexuals who date women. Sophia: Yeah, they're called lesbians. JACOB

12-27-2002, 09:40 PM	#2
DarleneIllyria Gone Forum Star Join Date: Oct 15, 2000 Posts: 19,086	And I swear this is the best award show of the year.

12-27-2002, 09:52 PM	#4
LucyFan Still Loving Lucy! Forum Fanatic Join Date: Sep 23, 2001 Location: In the Wonderful World of Lucy! Posts: 8,198	lol

12-27-2002, 09:56 PM	#5
AllIWantIsYourClutch peaceout. Forum Icon Join Date: Aug 02, 2001 Location: Illinois. Posts: 53,424	Thats funny!! Except for the last one...but the rest is funny!

12-27-2002, 11:12 PM	#9
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	LMAO.
	__________________ DAVID COOK FOR AMERICAN IDOL

12-27-2002, 11:20 PM	#10
ks Certifiably Insane Forum Veteran Join Date: Dec 21, 2000 Location: I live in my hole... Posts: 5,501	This is the most entertaining award show I've seen in quite some time. Keep it comin'! ks
	__________________ "Ya gotta have a little faith." C.D. DeLerenzo

12-28-2002, 12:21 AM	#11
Ewan's My Man I'll Cover You Forum Veteran Join Date: Sep 29, 2001 Location: Beneath the opera house... Posts: 5,682
	__________________ Don't you ever wanna be somebody to envy Don't you wanna be footloose and free? Well, you could be the life of the party If you were more- Like me! All you have to do is jump over the moon Moo with me!

12-28-2002, 12:48 AM	#12
~Hannah_Lee~ Let's dance in style Forum Veteran Join Date: Apr 09, 2002 Location: Alabama Posts: 7,358	LOL!!!! That is hilarious!!!!
	__________________ Some are like water, some are like the heat Some are a melody and some are the beat. Sooner or later they all will be gone. Why don't they stay young? It's so hard to get old without a cause. I don't want to perish like a fleeing horse. Youth is like diamonds in the sun, And diamonds are forever. Forever young, I want to be forever young. Do you really want to live forever?

12-28-2002, 01:05 AM	#13
Marilyn Monroe Diamonds... Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Aug 24, 2001 Location: Where gentlemen actually prefer brunettes Posts: 4,811	These are great! I have to agree with them all!