Brady Bunch or Brady Grid Security Procedures

[Robert Tilton]

And then ANOTHER Faithful Listener, Elizabeth, commented on how the Brady Bunch would answer the door "without really looking to see who it was". To which I had THIS to say earlier someplace:

Now let me start the Brady Grid Security Chart by saying that one of the things that makes Brady Bunch or Brady Grid such a classic is its friendly nature; yea that naivete' that makes for a right bobbly dazzler this. And the nature of good friendly interplay amongst the participants in the area of door answering is reflective of that proper philosophical bent. It makes for a masterpiece worth watching and reading about more than the greats like Kant, Dosteiovyski, Kierkegaard, Voltaire, Plato, Socrates, and yes even Ficiopri the GUB guy in that great group alt.tv.brady-bunch.

Amen.

Now what of the Bradys' answering the door and just letting the person in? And what about the doors in Brady Bunch? And what are the rules regarding answering the doors? Enquiring minds want to know! Let's begin.

The Brady Bunch Doors And Their Philosophy To Brady Living

Well normally Brady Related Folk like Sam, Davy Jones, Dezi Arnez Jr, etc come to the door so its not a problem in many cases. 90 + % of the time, the door in the living room is used w/the other 9.5 % coming in through the glass doors of the family room. VERY SELDOM you may see somebody come in through the hallway IN THE KITCHEN (a third door?). Lennie Bremen the Exterminator and a delivery boy used this door IIRC. Generally Brady Friends (like Sam) and Guests (Davy Jones) come in through the doors. Come to think of it, HAS A STRANGER ever gone to Brady Land?

Contemplate this essance while I move along with:

The Brady Bunch Security Chart

But and However, when it comes to strangers, well...Let's just say that there is empirical evidentiary ability to discern with Brady Logic and Wisdom that NO STRANGER ever comes through a door without "Brady Approval" if any strangers have ever come through at all.

Robert (Reed's) Rules of Order state:

When answering the door, the designated person is to arrive promptly and very courteously at the designated location for visitors (strangers) in the living room at the brick flooring known as THE STAGING AREA A after obtaining Grid Approval. If its the glass doors, THE STAGING AREA B will be near the TV; enter after Grid Approval. And it is well known that if the Brady Patio is breached just before entering into STAGING AREA B, Alice will kill you! So we'll call the Patio the KILL ZONE.

Now:

If True Brady Parents (Mike or Carol) or The Subsidiary Brady (Alice) go to the door, a cursory look of Brady Assessment may be given as the door is answered (just glance at him or her). This is done typically by giving the eyeball to the person at the door before letting them in (as Cindy did in one show w/a Righteous Act of surreptitiously getting on top of a chair & looking through the peephole! With adults, their miliage may vary; the peephole is optional). All strangers must meet with Grid Approval before coming in. Such is sufficient for the Brady Grid.

But if a kid within the Grid answers, the following procedure is administered with due speed: Greg or Marcia have GREEN LIGHT and may give the Brady Assessment. Peter or Jan (with vocal acknowledgement) have YELLOW LIGHT, so they must approach with Brady Caution at first and then give Brady Assessment. And of course the wee ones have a RED LIGHT most of the time and only with CIA TACTICAL Brady Caution (and vocal acknowledgement) may they do a Brady Assessment.

BTW, vocal acknowledgement may be defined as so: When the designated door answer person says "I'll get it". Ever wonder what Jan (or whoever) is doing when they do this? When she says "I'll get it", it means that she is getting Brady Approval before allowed to answer (and) if there is any Danger, the Brady Grid Authorities (Mike, Carol, or Alice) will not let the Brady House be breached. Hope that clears that up for everybody.

As seen in an episode where Greg & Marcia babysit the other kids, Bobby was given a Brady Lecture on "not talking to any strangers". In the process, Mike shows Bobby how to answer the door w/first the Blade (NEVER OPEN THE DOOR FOR PEOPLE WE DON'T KNOW) and then the Ear (My Name is Herman, Can I Come In? No you're a stranger where Bob LEARNS BRADY WISDOM), and then the Grains of Corn in this ep (a great gag ensues where Alice calls Bobby away to 'wash up for dinner' and Alice sees Mike "playing Herman"). Now here is the important part of these Brady Rules:

NOBODY gets to answer the Brady Door without going through the Brady Lecture in the way that Bobby did (on camera) or in regular Brady Time (off camera). Very important this. Also the approval method of Brady Assessment is to be used in the levels I just enumerated above.

If there is a breach of STAGING AREA A, the Bradys' will be, in the vernacular, really really mad at you, though courteous. Witness the Tank Gates ep where he 'just walked in'! He was very lucky. Had he breached the STAGING AREA B at Patio Level, Alice would have killed him. Ever wonder why Greg rigged up the cans tied to a string in one episode and ALICE ran into them? I'll tell you. She was in the Family Room going past STAGING AREA B to make sure it wasn't breached. Had it been breached at patio level in THE KILL ZONE, the enemy wouldn't have made it through the "glass". ALICE WILL KILL YOU!

Wasn't that Righteous?

Let's give Jesus a Handclap.

And the Brady Bunch or Brady Grid?

From my keyboard to God's ears my son.

[Truth]

Another Classic Post from Tilton,

[Beruche]

[Warm & Fuzzy]

Originally posted by Robert Tilton
And then ANOTHER Faithful Listener, Elizabeth, commented on how the Brady Bunch would answer the door "without really looking to see who it was". To which I had THIS to say earlier someplace:

Now let me start the Brady Grid Security Chart by saying that one of the things that makes Brady Bunch or Brady Grid such a classic is its friendly nature; yea that naivete' that makes for a right bobbly dazzler this. And the nature of good friendly interplay amongst the participants in the area of door answering is reflective of that proper philosophical bent. It makes for a masterpiece worth watching and reading about more than the greats like Kant, Dosteiovyski, Kierkegaard, Voltaire, Plato, Socrates, and yes even Ficiopri the GUB guy in that great group alt.tv.brady-bunch.

Amen.

Now what of the Bradys' answering the door and just letting the person in? And what about the doors in Brady Bunch? And what are the rules regarding answering the doors? Enquiring minds want to know! Let's begin.

The Brady Bunch Doors And Their Philosophy To Brady Living

Well normally Brady Related Folk like Sam, Davy Jones, Dezi Arnez Jr, etc come to the door so its not a problem in many cases. 90 + % of the time, the door in the living room is used w/the other 9.5 % coming in through the glass doors of the family room. VERY SELDOM you may see somebody come in through the hallway IN THE KITCHEN (a third door?). Lennie Bremen the Exterminator and a delivery boy used this door IIRC. Generally Brady Friends (like Sam) and Guests (Davy Jones) come in through the doors. Come to think of it, HAS A STRANGER ever gone to Brady Land?

Contemplate this essance while I move along with:

The Brady Bunch Security Chart

But and However, when it comes to strangers, well...Let's just say that there is empirical evidentiary ability to discern with Brady Logic and Wisdom that NO STRANGER ever comes through a door without "Brady Approval" if any strangers have ever come through at all.

Robert (Reed's) Rules of Order state:

When answering the door, the designated person is to arrive promptly and very courteously at the designated location for visitors (strangers) in the living room at the brick flooring known as THE STAGING AREA A after obtaining Grid Approval. If its the glass doors, THE STAGING AREA B will be near the TV; enter after Grid Approval. And it is well known that if the Brady Patio is breached just before entering into STAGING AREA B, Alice will kill you! So we'll call the Patio the KILL ZONE.

Now:

If True Brady Parents (Mike or Carol) or The Subsidiary Brady (Alice) go to the door, a cursory look of Brady Assessment may be given as the door is answered (just glance at him or her). This is done typically by giving the eyeball to the person at the door before letting them in (as Cindy did in one show w/a Righteous Act of surreptitiously getting on top of a chair & looking through the peephole! With adults, their miliage may vary; the peephole is optional). All strangers must meet with Grid Approval before coming in. Such is sufficient for the Brady Grid.

But if a kid within the Grid answers, the following procedure is administered with due speed: Greg or Marcia have GREEN LIGHT and may give the Brady Assessment. Peter or Jan (with vocal acknowledgement) have YELLOW LIGHT, so they must approach with Brady Caution at first and then give Brady Assessment. And of course the wee ones have a RED LIGHT most of the time and only with CIA TACTICAL Brady Caution (and vocal acknowledgement) may they do a Brady Assessment.

BTW, vocal acknowledgement may be defined as so: When the designated door answer person says "I'll get it". Ever wonder what Jan (or whoever) is doing when they do this? When she says "I'll get it", it means that she is getting Brady Approval before allowed to answer (and) if there is any Danger, the Brady Grid Authorities (Mike, Carol, or Alice) will not let the Brady House be breached. Hope that clears that up for everybody.

As seen in an episode where Greg & Marcia babysit the other kids, Bobby was given a Brady Lecture on "not talking to any strangers". In the process, Mike shows Bobby how to answer the door w/first the Blade (NEVER OPEN THE DOOR FOR PEOPLE WE DON'T KNOW) and then the Ear (My Name is Herman, Can I Come In? No you're a stranger where Bob LEARNS BRADY WISDOM), and then the Grains of Corn in this ep (a great gag ensues where Alice calls Bobby away to 'wash up for dinner' and Alice sees Mike "playing Herman"). Now here is the important part of these Brady Rules:

NOBODY gets to answer the Brady Door without going through the Brady Lecture in the way that Bobby did (on camera) or in regular Brady Time (off camera). Very important this. Also the approval method of Brady Assessment is to be used in the levels I just enumerated above.

If there is a breach of STAGING AREA A, the Bradys' will be, in the vernacular, really really mad at you, though courteous. Witness the Tank Gates ep where he 'just walked in'! He was very lucky. Had he breached the STAGING AREA B at Patio Level, Alice would have killed him. Ever wonder why Greg rigged up the cans tied to a string in one episode and ALICE ran into them? I'll tell you. She was in the Family Room going past STAGING AREA B to make sure it wasn't breached. Had it been breached at patio level in THE KILL ZONE, the enemy wouldn't have made it through the "glass". ALICE WILL KILL YOU!

Wasn't that Righteous?

Let's give Jesus a Handclap.

And the Brady Bunch or Brady Grid?

From my keyboard to God's ears my son.

I think the show contradicts this whole "don't talk to strangers" and "ask who it is before opening the doors" thing. what applies to the kids, definitely don't apply to neither Michael or Carol.

[Truth]

Originally posted by Robert Tilton

When answering the door, the designated person is to arrive promptly and very courteously at the designated location for visitors (strangers) in the living room at the brick flooring known as THE STAGING AREA A after obtaining Grid Approval. If its the glass doors, THE STAGING AREA B will be near the TV; enter after Grid Approval. And it is well known that if the Brady Patio is breached just before entering into STAGING AREA B, Alice will kill you! So we'll call the Patio the KILL ZONE.





If there is a breach of STAGING AREA A, the Bradys' will be, in the vernacular, really really mad at you, though courteous. Witness the Tank Gates ep where he 'just walked in'! He was very lucky. Had he breached the STAGING AREA B at Patio Level, Alice would have killed him. Ever wonder why Greg rigged up the cans tied to a string in one episode and ALICE ran into them? I'll tell you. She was in the Family Room going past STAGING AREA B to make sure it wasn't breached. Had it been breached at patio level in THE KILL ZONE, the enemy wouldn't have made it through the "glass". ALICE WILL KILL YOU!

Two Classic Paragraphs...

[Truth]

This Tilton post is probably 3rd in the top 10 Tilton posts of all time! Woohoo! Of course we all know Number 1 is Tilton's laugh at Courtney(Bubble Girl)

[Beruche]

Originally posted by AAOT
Of course we all know Number 1 is Tilton's laugh at Courtney(Bubble Girl)

[Beruche]

Originally posted by Robert Tilton

----HA----
----HA----
----HA----

ROTFL!!!

Are you kidding?

Uh let me help you here...HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHA HA HA HA HA HA!...I'm sorry..HE HE HE HE

Let me calm down here. HA HA HA HAHA HA HA HA Oh my Gosh!

Righteous Buzz Righteous Righteous Righteous Righteous! Out of the belly out of the belly out of the belly! Glory Glory Glory Glory! Habba Habba Habba Habba Habba! Have mercy!

I'm gonna laugh for days at this one!

And I thought seeing "Getting Davy Jones" for the 1000th Time on N@N was funny.

OKAY. What's the deal?

#1: The person replied to a months old thread (check the dates)

#2: I just got a check for $150 Bucks so I don't need to ask for money

Etc.

#3: This person HA HA HA HA HA HA

Nuf said.

Oh Jeff?

Yes Robert?

Ka la ba ka la ba ka la ba sha ta

bo bo bo bo

I have ministered in many tent revivals, prayed over numerous prayer requests (and trashed em!) and I have hung out w/Oral Roberts son at his groovy ORU Rec Room but Never have I seen a person like this. The Wonder Vow of Prosperity wouldn't help here...this is a job for Jeff Barnes!

Jeff:

Now it is time for Brady Reprograming.

Thanks Robert: Let us go to our Brady Reference for the Day and get Logic and Wisdom as the Brady Grid says: Read:

Psalms 30 vs.1
I will extol thee, O Lord, for thou hast lifted me up and has not made my foes to rejoice over me. Jeff:

<and Lo so has this thread concerning the Brady Promise and the Silliness that is Brady Bunch Living. Never mind Reed's being Gay, what about this thread? See No Toilet and Ficiopri's Growing Up Brady for more nutty topics; however this person I'm replying to takes the cake!!!HA HA HA HA HA...Calma Calma. Digress. Grazie.>

Read:

Psalms 30 vs.2
Oh Lord my God I cried unto Thee and Thou hast healed me <as that Brady Grid comes up I feel the Righteousness of His Creation; yea and the Word of Faith in Life's Simple Pleasures. Great is Brady yes but Great is the Lord!>

Psalms 30 vs.3
Oh Lord Thou hast brought up my soul from the grave, thou hast kept me alive, that I should not go down to the pit!

<Amen. BTW a boring topic has been Revived and I salute you!>

Psalms 30 vs.4
Sing Unto the Lord, O Ye Saints of his and give thanks at the remembrance of his holiness.

<And let us ever be mindful of Thy Bountiful Blessings. AH-MEN! Check out my "Bobby's Hero" topic if you get the chance; it ain't as silly as this thread but it much like Brady Life is:

Righteous.>

Psalms 30 vs.5
For his anger endureth but a moment in his favor is Life <I'm getting Anoited at this point for the Brady Life is but a symbol of that Eternal Life that Will Be. Read:> weeping may endure for a night but Joy cometh in the morning.

<Amen. Especially w/Brady Grid doing a 3rd Shift showing at 5:00 AM! And of course being that Brady Bunch gives Joy to All Nations...well.. YGTP (You Get the Picture).>

But here is the Critical Verse I want to get to. Hear the Man of Barnes and get Revelation Knowledge and incidentally:

<What is it about this Brady Bunch board that makes all the kooks come out? One would think a person would know full well that I couldn't get your $ even if I wanted to...you see AND HERE IS WISDOM FROM THE 3RD HEAVEN FOR GOD HATH GIVEN ME A GOOD MIND PRAISE JESUS...I don't know you so I couldn't collect! I like to'ove died laughing when I read that ?

Amen.

Here however is the Verse of Scripture that will set you free...Reading Word is excellent for Wisdom and Knowledge as is the Brady Grid. Read:

Psalms 30 vs.6:
And in My Prosperity I said I shall NEVER Be Moved!

<Well Robert Tilton won't anyway ) In case you don't know Tilton is a Prosperity Minister on TV and my Screen Name! Too right and moving along. Digress>

This concludes Deprograming for All Newbies. Ficiopri's GUB Threadology is a mere cackle compared to this thread. Are you asking me for $!?! Oh My!

Greg:

Kids.

Amen.

Thats the greatest Tilton post ever.

[Truth]

Yep thats the number 1 tilton post, The laugh at courtney!

[Truth]

"What is it about this Brady Bunch board that makes all the kooks come out? "


That's classic

[Beruche]

Originally posted by AAOT
"What is it about this Brady Bunch board that makes all the kooks come out? "


That's classic

Yep and so true.

[¤I Love Clay Aiken¤]

LOl. Hes so funny! Although, sometimes I dont understand...