A Honeymooners Election Day:

[Frank Gannucci]

A Honeymooners Election Day:

(Ralph & Alice are listening to the news.)

Male news anchor: “Tonight’s the night people. We will decide who the next president of the USA.”

Alice: “Ralph, are you ready to go to the polls and vote?”

Ralph: “I am.”

(The Nortons come down.)

Ed: “Whaddaya say there Kramdens?”

Ralph: “I am ready to vote.”

Ed: “Ralph, I hope you fit into those new election voting booths.”

Ralph: “You are a regular riot Alice. I hope they like those jokes on the moon because that’s where you are going. I am going to fit in there Alice and I will slide out. I am voting for the Presidency of the USA.”

Ed: “So am I Ralph-ie boy. With Joe Biden retiring, we will get a new president.”

Ralph: “How old is Joe, 150? Hahaha. If he did get re-elected and survived his second term, I am wondering what his quality of life will be like afterwards.”

Ed: “I wonder.”

Trixie: “I hope that you two don’t embarrass us.”

Ed: “We won’t.”

(Later on at the polls, Ralph goes into the booth and because he’s so fat, he can’t get out.)

Ralph (yells): “I AM STUCK. HELP ME.”

(People arec laughing at him.)

Ralph (to the people, yells): “SHUT UP!”

Alice: “What did I tell you Ralph?”

Ralph: “Don’t give me those ‘I told you sos.’”

(The firemen come and get him out. The Kramdens and Nortons get in the Kramden apartment.)

Ralph: “That was not my fault.”

Ed: “No, it wasn’t. You were just doing your impression of four pounds of bologna in a one pound bag.”

Ralph (to Ed, yells): “GET OUT!”

(The Nortons leave.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: “The Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!”

(Crowd cheers.)