Worst "Mystery Science Theater 3000" movies - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Brian · 09-06-2002, 07:31 PM

Ever watch "Mystery Science Theater 3000", where a man and two robots watch bad movies? I love that show. Here are the WORST movies they have ever done.

107 - Robot Monster (the director of this film found it impossible to get any work after this film was released and attempted suicide. He missed.)

314 - Mighty Jack (a very incomprehensible Japanese film)

315 - Teenage Caveman (stars Robert Vaughn of TV's "The Man from U.N.C.L.E." as the title character! That doesn't save the film, though)

317 - Viking Women and the Sea Serpent (Don't be fooled by the title. There are a lot of Viking women but the sea serpent appears only twice. A cheap Roger Corman film)

321 - Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (Paul Chaplin, former writer of the show calls this film "a mess. And not a fun mess either. Just horrible." He is right. A stupid film about green martians who kidnap Santa Claus and bring him to Mars. It also has a stupid theme song that you would hate to have stuck in your head)

404 - Teenagers from Outer Space (The teenagers in this film look at least thirty. This was so cheap, the producers had no money left to create a giant lobster so they just inserted a shadow of one in the film)

416 - Fire Maidens of Outer Space (PC calls this a film that "goes straight down in history and then comes right back up. I agree.)

418 - Attack of the Eye Creatures (The eye creatures in this film are basically guys covered with eyeballs...or maybe they are frogs eggs. A lot of continuity errors in this movie. Peter Graves, or at least his voice, appears in the beginning of the film)

419 - The Rebel Set (This episode is for "Get Smart" fans because it stars Ed Platt "The Chief" as a con man who easily manipulates teenagers into robbing an armored car.)

421 - Monster a Go-Go (This movie is not only incomprehensible but it has no continuity, no plot and no sense. One of the worst films ever made)

424 - Manos: The Hands of Fate (Possibly the worst movie ever made. It makes Ed Wood's "Plan Nine from Outer Space", known as the worst movie ever made, look like "Citizen Kane")

508 - Operation Double 007 (A James Bond ripoff starring Sean Connery's brother Neil Connery!! It doesn't work out, though)

515 - The Wild Wild World of Batwoman (A horrible film. Batwoman looks more like a badger than a bat and most of the movie features girls dancing. No plot and no sense at all)

516 - Alien from L.A. (It has Kathy Ireland - and her very squeaky voice - but that does not help the film at all. One of my personal favorite episodes)

603 - The Dead Talk Back (Don't be fooled by the title; the dead never do talk back)

604 - Zombie Nightmare (This bomb features TV's Adam West and Tia Carrerre but even they can't make this a good film.)

606 - The Creeping Terror (The "terror" is basically a cross between a giant caterpillar and a chinese dragon. It eats people - who help it out by waiting for it to come and then crawling into its mouth/hole/opening. Most of the film is narrated because the director accidentally knocked over the sound recording equipment into a lake and didn't have any money to replace it)

618 - High School Big Shot (The most depressing film ever made.)

621 - The Beast of Yucca Flats (This Coleman Francis cow pie makes "Plan Nine" look like "Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring". A defecting Russian scientist - played by Tor Johnson -turns into a mad, lumbering man after an atomic bomb blast. This movie is completely narrated as the entire soundtrack was accidentally erased during post production. Coleman Francis' narration is horrible and he makes such random statements)

Can anybody else think of any more horrible MST3K movies?

GeorgeCTX · 09-20-2002, 12:00 PM

I am a HUGE fan of MST3K (not to the point of knowing the episodes by # but have been taping on and off since Comedy Central). The worst episode I can think of is the one where a group of college students and their teacher go into swamp country looking for a legendary swamp monster. The jeep with the 2 girls gets stuck in the mud.... it's so terrible, I can hardly sit through it.

Brian · 09-20-2002, 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by GeorgeCTX
I am a HUGE fan of MST3K (not to the point of knowing the episodes by # but have been taping on and off since Comedy Central). The worst episode I can think of is the one where a group of college students and their teacher go into swamp country looking for a legendary swamp monster. The jeep with the 2 girls gets stuck in the mud.... it's so terrible, I can hardly sit through it.

I believe that is episode 1006-Boggy Creek II. It's available on video from the MST3K Info Club.

TJL · 09-20-2002, 07:50 PM

Two movies by horrible film maker Coleman Francis

Ep 619 - Red Zone Cuba - Incomprehensible, horrible.
Ep 609 - The Skydivers - Ditto

Brian · 09-20-2002, 08:00 PM

If Ed Wood isn't the worst director who ever lived, then Coleman Francis would certainly fit the bill.

The Modfather · 09-20-2003, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Brian
If Ed Wood isn't the worst director who ever lived, then Coleman Francis would certainly fit the bill.

Ed Wood, is the worlds best director!

09-06-2002, 07:31 PM	#1
Brian Member Forum Celebrity Join Date: Jun 23, 2001 Posts: 20,451	Worst "Mystery Science Theater 3000" movies Ever watch "Mystery Science Theater 3000", where a man and two robots watch bad movies? I love that show. Here are the WORST movies they have ever done. 107 - Robot Monster (the director of this film found it impossible to get any work after this film was released and attempted suicide. He missed.) 314 - Mighty Jack (a very incomprehensible Japanese film) 315 - Teenage Caveman (stars Robert Vaughn of TV's "The Man from U.N.C.L.E." as the title character! That doesn't save the film, though) 317 - Viking Women and the Sea Serpent (Don't be fooled by the title. There are a lot of Viking women but the sea serpent appears only twice. A cheap Roger Corman film) 321 - Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (Paul Chaplin, former writer of the show calls this film "a mess. And not a fun mess either. Just horrible." He is right. A stupid film about green martians who kidnap Santa Claus and bring him to Mars. It also has a stupid theme song that you would hate to have stuck in your head) 404 - Teenagers from Outer Space (The teenagers in this film look at least thirty. This was so cheap, the producers had no money left to create a giant lobster so they just inserted a shadow of one in the film) 416 - Fire Maidens of Outer Space (PC calls this a film that "goes straight down in history and then comes right back up. I agree.) 418 - Attack of the Eye Creatures (The eye creatures in this film are basically guys covered with eyeballs...or maybe they are frogs eggs. A lot of continuity errors in this movie. Peter Graves, or at least his voice, appears in the beginning of the film) 419 - The Rebel Set (This episode is for "Get Smart" fans because it stars Ed Platt "The Chief" as a con man who easily manipulates teenagers into robbing an armored car.) 421 - Monster a Go-Go (This movie is not only incomprehensible but it has no continuity, no plot and no sense. One of the worst films ever made) 424 - Manos: The Hands of Fate (Possibly the worst movie ever made. It makes Ed Wood's "Plan Nine from Outer Space", known as the worst movie ever made, look like "Citizen Kane") 508 - Operation Double 007 (A James Bond ripoff starring Sean Connery's brother Neil Connery!! It doesn't work out, though) 515 - The Wild Wild World of Batwoman (A horrible film. Batwoman looks more like a badger than a bat and most of the movie features girls dancing. No plot and no sense at all) 516 - Alien from L.A. (It has Kathy Ireland - and her very squeaky voice - but that does not help the film at all. One of my personal favorite episodes) 603 - The Dead Talk Back (Don't be fooled by the title; the dead never do talk back) 604 - Zombie Nightmare (This bomb features TV's Adam West and Tia Carrerre but even they can't make this a good film.) 606 - The Creeping Terror (The "terror" is basically a cross between a giant caterpillar and a chinese dragon. It eats people - who help it out by waiting for it to come and then crawling into its mouth/hole/opening. Most of the film is narrated because the director accidentally knocked over the sound recording equipment into a lake and didn't have any money to replace it) 618 - High School Big Shot (The most depressing film ever made.) 621 - The Beast of Yucca Flats (This Coleman Francis cow pie makes "Plan Nine" look like "Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring". A defecting Russian scientist - played by Tor Johnson -turns into a mad, lumbering man after an atomic bomb blast. This movie is completely narrated as the entire soundtrack was accidentally erased during post production. Coleman Francis' narration is horrible and he makes such random statements) Can anybody else think of any more horrible MST3K movies?

09-20-2002, 12:00 PM	#2
GeorgeCTX Member Occasional Poster Join Date: Sep 13, 2002 Location: Northeast Posts: 59	Worst MST3K Movies I am a HUGE fan of MST3K (not to the point of knowing the episodes by # but have been taping on and off since Comedy Central). The worst episode I can think of is the one where a group of college students and their teacher go into swamp country looking for a legendary swamp monster. The jeep with the 2 girls gets stuck in the mud.... it's so terrible, I can hardly sit through it.

09-20-2002, 07:50 PM	#4
TJL Suburbanite Extrordinaire Forum Star Join Date: Dec 29, 2001 Location: New Jersey - the cradle of civilization Posts: 16,591	Two movies by horrible film maker Coleman Francis Ep 619 - Red Zone Cuba - Incomprehensible, horrible. Ep 609 - The Skydivers - Ditto
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09-20-2002, 08:00 PM	#5
Brian Member Forum Celebrity Join Date: Jun 23, 2001 Posts: 20,451	If Ed Wood isn't the worst director who ever lived, then Coleman Francis would certainly fit the bill.