John Gage: Not the Sharpest Knife in the Firehouse Drawer?

[Sgt. Saunders]

On “Emergency,” fireman/paramedic John Gage often seems confused and slow to pick up on things. For example, when John and Roy DeSoto are the guests on a live tv broadcast, John is seen inexplicably munching away on a sandwich only seconds before the two firemen were about to speak on the live show. The bewildered John barely got the last morsel of food swallowed before the tv host started to grill him and Roy about with questions regarding their various duties and responsibilities. Thankfully, the always-cool-in-clutch Roy DeSoto was there to uphold the professionalism and competence of the men of Station 51.

Another time, after rescuing a famous actor (portrayed by the late, great Adam West of “Batman”fame), John and Roy are invited to the actor’s home for a weekend party. John then comes up with the absolutely “brilliant” idea for them to rent tuxedos for this great party, where they will hobnob with all of these A-list Hollywood types.

Of course, when they arrive at this chic and hip party dressed in those cloddish tuxedos, everyone else at the party is dressed like Richard Gere and Lauren Hutton in the stylish crime drama, “American Gigolo.” Talk about sticking out like the proverbial dorky thumb!

And, finally, just how many times on the show, did we see Chet Kelly, the consummate firehouse jokester/instigator, make the callow and gullible John Gage always look like the ultimate country bumpkin? You’d have thought that John would have eventually wised-up after being the target of Chet’s seemingly endless supply of pranks and gags.

John was SO clueless and naive, that he even reminded me of poor, doltish Herman Munster, when Herman was the daily target of some wimpy prankster at the funeral parlor where both Herman and this all-too-annoying pipsqueak worked on “The
Munsters.” (At least, even the mild and self-effacing Herman finally “grew a pair” and “disabused” this jerk of his miserable attitude.)

I’d like to think that John would have matured and hardened as he got older. But, I really wonder if John could ever change from being an ingenuous and compliant doormat? I highly doubt it.