"The Honeymooners Do Shakespeare: 'The Land of Moon and Honey'":

[Frank Gannucci]

"The Honeymooners Do Shakespeare: 'The Land of Moon and Honey'":

The Honeymooners Do Shakespeare - YouTube

The video stars Rob Bartlett as Ralph, Dan Kinsella as Norton and Kim Cea as Alice. It is written by Rob Bartlett, produced by Gary Grant and Royne Lisa Simmons and directed by Haig Papasian.

Because of the title, the dialogue is written the same way that Shakespeare would have written it.

Ralph calls Ed Norton down. Ralph shows off his bowling trophy that he thinks he will win tonight. He says that Alice thinks that Ralph will take her out for mambo lessons. Ralph says that he is the king of the castle and he will force Alice to come with him to the bowling alley. Ha! Alice comes out. Crowd cheers. Alice: "What is new Norton?" Ed: "Nothing." Ralph: "Norton, get thee lost." He does. What a nice man. Not!

RAlph senses that there is rotten in the state of Flatbush. Alice pulls out the "roast" she had in the oven that she says it is ruined. Actually, the roast is a replica of a human skull. Ralph says for Alice not to worry and that his father has been killed by his uncle. Alice thinks that this means that there are no mambo lessons tonight. Ralph says that he must avenge his dad's death. Alice is upset by Ralph breaking his promise to her. Ralph: "Do you cut me, do I not bleed? Do you tickle me, do I not laugh?" Alice says all right to Ralph for avenging his Dad's death. Ralph: "You are the greatest." They hug.

But, hold the phone. As Ralph goes to get his car keys, Ed comes down to get a plunger. He asks Alice why she is so melancholy? Alice explains that Ralph's Dad has been murdered by his Uncle. Ed "cries" in typical Ed fashion. Ed: "THis news breaks my heart." Ralph comes in. He tries to motion to Ed to keep quiet as Ed asks: "Does this mean that bowling is off?" Alice smells a rat. Ed blabs the secret. Alice walks off in a huff by implying that Ralph is an idiot. Ralph tries to talk to Alice but to no avail. Ed: "Bowling. To be or not to be? That is the question." Ralph: "Oh, you shall be Norton. He kicks him out as the sketch ends.

"The Honeymooners" from the musical For Whom The Bridge Tolls:

The Honeymooners - YouTube

This is by Rita Abrams and Stan Sinberg @ The Plush Room - San Francisco, CA. This was filmed on August 7, 1999. With Mark Irwin, Amir Talai, and Erin-Kate Whitcomb!. No, I don't know who these people are.

The theme song plays but cuts off after the announcer says: "Jackie Gleason. THe Honeymooners." Then the sketch starts.

Ralph comes into the kitchen. Ed comes in. Ed asks if Ralph is going to the Raccoon picnic. Ralph says that he wouldn't miss it for the world. They give the Raccoon salute which is them surrounding their eyes with their fingers and yelling: "LO-LO-LO-LO-LO-LO-LO-LO!" That is sooo not the salute we saw on the real show but this renactment is non-canon so I guess it can be expected.

Ed asks Ralph if he has anything to eat. Ralph says sure. He sits down and after warming up his arms in Ed fashion which causes Ralph to yell at him, he simulates eating food. Ed asks Ralph about Alice letting Ralph go. Ralph syas that he is the king of the castle. Alice comes in. Alice: "Where do you think you are going, your royal rotund-a-dee?" Ralph: "I am going to the Raccoon Lodge." Alice: "We are going to see my mother." Ralph objects. Ralph: "She is a blabbermouth." Alice: "At least she is not a blubbermouth." Ed laughs. Ralph kicks him out. Ed leaves.

They argue. Ralph says that Alice is going to the moon. Alice: "If you set foot out of this house, I will never see you again." Ralph goes to leave. A guy named John Gray comes in. He says that men are from Mars and women are from Venus. John is here to repair the Kramdens relationship. John is going to give them tools for clear communication between the two. Ralph (yells): "GET OUT!" John doesn't leave. He goes to Alice and says that after Ralph finishes a hard days work, he needs time to decompress. John: "He needs to be in his cave." Alice: "What about me? I work all day in this house." Ralph scoffs at this. John: "Ralph, Alice needs to know that you love and respect her." Alice: "Why don't you listen to the man?" Ralph: "Why don't I listen? Why don't I listen? Because every time I listen, I end up going to your mother's house. Your mother is a blabbermouth Alice. A blabbermouth." John: "Being a response Ralph is a key to a long marriage." Ralph says that they don't need his help because they have been married for 20 years. John: "So have I. My first marriage was two years..." Ralph: "Wait a minute. You have been divorced and you are giving us marriage advice? Listen, you may know about Mars and Venus but you are going to the MOON." John talks to Ralph about what Alice needs. Ralph: "Just those things? Well, I only want one thing. I want to go to the Raccoons." John says for Ralph to act like he loves Alice since he says that Ralph loves her. How does this John know so much about them? Alice says that he may taker for granted but she wouldn't trade him for anything. Ralph now says that he will go to her mother's house. They embrace as the sketch ends.

Credit goes to Youtube.