Why So Formal? - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Umbrella Girl · 03-03-2022, 02:35 PM

Why did Samantha address Darrin’s mother as Mrs. Stephens? It’s much too formal, especially after having been married to Darrin for several years. She could have addressed her as Mom, or if she wasn’t comfortable with that, she could have addressed her as Phyllis, similar to how Darrin addressed Samantha’s mother as Endora.

tcr1701 · 03-03-2022, 06:00 PM

I think it was a sign of respect back in the 1960s to call your elders by a formal name. And Darrin had to call his mother-in-law "Endora" because she never told him her last name.

PracTz · 03-03-2022, 07:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Umbrella Girl

Why did Samantha address Darrin’s mother as Mrs. Stephens? It’s much too formal, especially after having been married to Darrin for several years. She could have addressed her as Mom, or if she wasn’t comfortable with that, she could have addressed her as Phyllis, similar to how Darrin addressed Samantha’s mother as Endora.

It seemed more likely than not that Phyllis and Samantha Stevens ever had more than the most civil of bonds with no warmth or bonds growing even with the births of Tabitha and Adam. In my own family, both my parents initially called their mothers-in-law Mrs.___ but after my oldest sib was born ( just over nine months after the wedding), they called them 'Nana' and 'Sweetie' (what the grandkids were encouraged to call their grandmothers). Alas, Samantha never deigned to call Phyllis 'Grandma' after Tabitha's birth nor did Phyllis encourage this. But then again Darren never called Endora 'Grandmama' after Tabitha's birth (and I wonder if Endora would have liked it or loathed it had he done so). BTW, I saw an old campaign commercial from 1960 with Rose Fitzgerald and Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy- and despite the younger Mrs. Kennedy having borne the elder Mrs. Kennedy's granddaughter Caroline, she rather stiffly kept calling her 'Mrs. Kennedy' while having a discussion about JFK.

stevea · 03-03-2022, 07:22 PM

Mabel Albertson played that part as uppity to anyone in Sam's family. So Sam probably was taken aback by her.

Mrs. Stephens was exactly like my grandmother--my mother still called her "Mother" though.

And Darrin probably called Sam's mother Endora because we never knew that family name. I think Endora said no one (referring to mortals) could pronounce it.

shotzette · 03-03-2022, 10:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Umbrella Girl

Why did Samantha address Darrin’s mother as Mrs. Stephens? It’s much too formal, especially after having been married to Darrin for several years. She could have addressed her as Mom, or if she wasn’t comfortable with that, she could have addressed her as Phyllis, similar to how Darrin addressed Samantha’s mother as Endora.

Personal preference, maybe? I have a dear friend who after 25+ years of marriage still calls her in laws Mr. and Missus. Her husband refers to her parents as "Military Rank" and "Mom". I called my in laws by their first name from day one and encouraged my husband to refer to my parents the same way.

KatieAnn · 03-03-2022, 11:53 PM

Isn't there an episode where Samantha called her father in law, Pops? Or something like that. It would have been early in the series.

Darrin's mother set the "tone" for her relationship with Samantha, and she seemed to prefer to be distant and formal.

Willbo · 03-04-2022, 06:14 PM

I love Mrs. Stephens but she would be a difficult mother in law. She was always so distant to Samantha. Do we know if she ever liked Sheila? I can't recall if it was ever mentioned.

stevea · 03-04-2022, 10:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Willbo

I love Mrs. Stephens but she would be a difficult mother in law. She was always so distant to Samantha. Do we know if she ever liked Sheila? I can't recall if it was ever mentioned.

I don't think it ever came up. But I doubt anybody would have been good enough for her Darrin.

03-03-2022, 02:35 PM	#1
Umbrella Girl Member Occasional Poster Join Date: Feb 27, 2022 Posts: 12	Why So Formal? Why did Samantha address Darrin’s mother as Mrs. Stephens? It’s much too formal, especially after having been married to Darrin for several years. She could have addressed her as Mom, or if she wasn’t comfortable with that, she could have addressed her as Phyllis, similar to how Darrin addressed Samantha’s mother as Endora.

03-03-2022, 06:00 PM	#2
tcr1701 Member Frequent Poster Join Date: Oct 22, 2012 Posts: 461	I think it was a sign of respect back in the 1960s to call your elders by a formal name. And Darrin had to call his mother-in-law "Endora" because she never told him her last name.

03-03-2022, 07:22 PM	#4
stevea 22 Years On Sitcoms Moderator Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 13, 2003 Location: Indy Posts: 44,799	Mabel Albertson played that part as uppity to anyone in Sam's family. So Sam probably was taken aback by her. Mrs. Stephens was exactly like my grandmother--my mother still called her "Mother" though. And Darrin probably called Sam's mother Endora because we never knew that family name. I think Endora said no one (referring to mortals) could pronounce it.

03-03-2022, 11:53 PM	#6
KatieAnn Member Forum Regular Join Date: Sep 15, 2011 Posts: 520	Isn't there an episode where Samantha called her father in law, Pops? Or something like that. It would have been early in the series. Darrin's mother set the "tone" for her relationship with Samantha, and she seemed to prefer to be distant and formal.

03-04-2022, 06:14 PM	#7
Willbo Member Forum Regular Join Date: Feb 10, 2012 Location: Chattanooga, TN Posts: 863	I love Mrs. Stephens but she would be a difficult mother in law. She was always so distant to Samantha. Do we know if she ever liked Sheila? I can't recall if it was ever mentioned.