Honeymooners Episode Reviews "Ring Salesman" (2 '52 versions) & "House Beautiful"...

[Frank Gannucci]

Honeymooners Episode Reviews "Ring Salesman" (2 '52 versions) & "House Beautiful" (aka "Pardon My Glove"):

Episode #13
TV: Hasn’t been seen on TV since its original airdate.
VHS: Hadn't been released.
DVD: Hasn't been released.
Air Date: Sat. 3/28/52

"Ring Salesman" (Jackie Gleason Show version):

In 2020, the December 1951 version of this sketch was colorized on YouTube.

This sketch is still lost.

The episode opens up with Alice (Pert Kelton) singing. Ralph & Ed arrive. Alice goes into the bedroom. Ed & Ralph are going bowling against the same team. Ralph isn’t worried about the team. Ralph finds a note: Dear Alice, meet me at the same spot this afternoon and I will take you around to a few places. Then I will sneak up to your place tonight after Ralph leaves for bowling. Signed Joe.” Ralph thinks that Alice and Joe are lovers and that Joe is tearing down an “empire” that took him 12 years to build. Ed said that maybe it isn’t Alice’s fault since he knew a married guy whose wife was sitting at a bar one night drinking and some guy came around and picked her up. Ed: “Don’t let this upset you because you will bowl lousy tonight.” Ralph can’t bowl tonight due to this situation. Ed leaves. Alice comes out. Alice asks for Ralph to hurry up and eat so he can go bowl. Ralph says that he might NOT go bowling. Alice: “Ralph, you got to go.” Ralph says that he might have been leaving Alice alone too much. Alice: “Every man needs a night out.” Ralph: “Some guys need an afternoon out.” Alice says that Ralph is acting stupid and Ralph agrees that nobody knows more about him being stupid than Alice does.

Alice asks if something fell on Ralph’s head. Ralph: “Yes, the whole world.” Alice asks what is on Ralph’s mind. Ralph tells Alice to explain the note. Alice explains that she can’t so Ralph says that he will. Ralph: “You have been playing me for a dope for a long time.” Ralph accuses Alice of going to nightclubs while he is out as well as running around with a guy named Joe. Alice: “Ralph, this is all in your head.” Ralph: “There is nothing in my head.” Ralph says that he doesn’t waste his money on expensive things so he takes the little money he has and buys a twin-burial plot.

Joe comes in. Joe has the ring. Ralph challenges Joe to fight. Alice explains that Joe is a jeweler. I think that Pert made an error and called Joe Benson Ralph Benson. Alice was going to give Ralph a ring for his birthday. Alice apologizes to Joe. Joe doesn’t mind. He leaves. Ralph doesn’t get the ring at least for now. Cue the Ralph-is-remorseful-for-what-he-did-to-Alice-bit. Ralph says that he is jealous of Alice. Alice not only forgives Ralph but she thanks her because not every wife that has a husband who is still jealous of her after 12 years of married life. They hug and kiss.

Episode #14
E.S. Show:
TV: Hasn’t been seen on TV since its original airdate.
DVD: Attached to "Bread", "Razor Blades", "New TV Set", "Ralph Threatens To Leave", “Ralph and Alice Get Dressed For A Date Last Night” (aka “The Dance”), "Ring Salesman" (JGS versions), “Honeymooners Xmas Party (’51 version), "Quiz Show" (both versions), "Cold" (’53 version), "New Bowling Ball", "The Turkey", "Lost Baby", "Halloween Party", "Pickles", "Jellybeans" & "Six Months To Live."
Air Date: Mon. 3/30/52

"Ring Salesman":

In 2020, the December 1951 version of this sketch was colorized on YouTube.

This sketch was shown on Ed Sullivan’s old show. The script for this episode is at UCLA Library Special Collections Box 109 Folder 24 Harry Crane Collection.

The episode opens up with Alice (Pert Kelton) singing. Ralph & Ed arrive. It’s strange watching an old Honeymooners clip without the studio audience applauding. Alice goes into the bedroom. Ed & Ralph are going bowling against the same team. Ralph isn’t worried about the team. Ralph finds a note: Dear Alice, meet me at the same spot this afternoon and I will take you around to a few places. Then I will sneak up to your place tonight after Ralph leaves for bowling. Signed Joe.” Ralph thinks that Alice and Joe are lovers and that Joe is tearing down an “empire” that took him 12 years to build. Ed said that maybe it isn’t Alice’s fault since he knew a married guy whose wife was sitting at a bar one night drinking and some guy came around and picked her up. Ed: “Don’t let this upset you because you will bowl lousy tonight.” Ralph can’t bowl tonight due to this situation. Ed leaves. Alice comes out. Alice asks for Ralph to hurry up and eat so he can go bowl. Ralph says that he might NOT go bowling. Alice: “Ralph, you got to go.” Ralph says that he might have been leaving Alice alone too much. Alice: “Every man needs a night out.” Ralph: “Some guys need an afternoon out.” Alice says that Ralph is acting stupid and Ralph agrees that nobody knows more about him being stupid than Alice does.

Alice asks if something fell on Ralph’s head. Ralph: “Yes, the whole world.” Alice asks what is on Ralph’s mind. Ralph tells Alice to explain the note. Alice explains that she can’t so Ralph says that he will. Ralph: “You have been playing me for a dope for a long time.” Ralph accuses Alice of going to nightclubs while he is out as well as running around with a guy named Joe. Alice: “Ralph, this is all in your head.” Ralph: “There is nothing in my head.” Ralph says that he doesn’t waste his money on expensive things so he takes the little money he has and buys a twin-burial plot.

Joe comes in. Joe has the ring. Ralph challenges Joe to fight. Alice explains that Joe is a jeweler. I think that Pert made an error and called Joe Benson Ralph Benson. Alice was going to give Ralph a ring for his birthday. Alice apologizes to Joe. Joe doesn’t mind. He leaves. Ralph doesn’t get the ring at least for now. Cue the Ralph-is-remorseful-for-what-he-did-to-Alice-bit. Ralph says that he is jealous of Alice. Alice not only forgives Ralph but she thanks her because not every wife that has a husband who is still jealous of her after 12 years of married life. They hug and kiss.

Episode #15
TV: Hasn't been seen on TV since its original air date.
VHS: Hadn't been released.
DVD: Hasn't been released.
Air Date: Sat. 4/4/52

"Surprise Party":

Note: I don't have an earlier version of this episode but since it is to believed an earlier version of “House Besutiful", I thought I would post the review for "House Beautiful” aka “Pardon My Glove”). The script for this episode is at UCLA Library Special Collections Box 109 Folder 8 Harry Crane Collection.

This episode is believed to be an earlier version of "House Beautiful" (aka "Pardon My Glove.")

To see the finished script, click here: http://www.springfieldspringfield.co...episode=s04e24

The girls are discussing on what to do for Ralph's birthday. Alice wants to give Ralph a cake with "Happy Birthday Ralph" on it. She changes the flavor because the previous flavor is a flavor that he likes and she just got him a belt and she wants to make sure it fits. Trixie: "If it doesn't, you can always exchange it for bigger size." Alice: "There is no bigger size." Ha! They finish up the plans and the guest list. Trixie leaves. The boys come in from their Raccoon meeting. They play on eating the pizza pie they have with them. Ralph is apparently on a diet and Alice orders him to eat the salad that she made for him. Alice goes to bed as the boys eat. Ralph: "This is not a bad salad. Everything in this salad is good for you. Got carrots for your eyes. Beats for your blood. Lettuce for your teeth. Everything in here is good for you." Ed: "Poor little pizza. Ain't good for nothing." Ed is really enjoying the pizza pie. Ralph wants a teeney-wenney piece. Ed chops up a piece that is too small so Ralph asks for a bigger piece. Ed says that the bigger piece is an itsy-bitsy piece. Ed: "This is an itsy-bitsy piece and this is a teeney-wenney piece." The boys spot the guest list and the fact that Alice has not forgotten about Ralph's birthday and she's planning for a surprise party for him tomorrow night. Ed says that the bets way for him not to ruin the surprise party is to act surprised. Ed demonstrates in a very bad way that you can tell that his "surprise" is not real. Alice wakes up and Ed almost spills the beans.

The next morning, Alice is talking to Andre, the Interior Decorator at a department store. Trixie comes by and Alice offers the great news. Andre's Department Store is going to decorate the apartment for nothing and they will get free publicity in Sunday's paper. When Andre, the interior decorator came into the kitchen from the bedroom, you can see an empty ashtray and Andre holding his cigar. If you watch closely when Trixie is talking to Alice, you can see Andre holding his cigar until he reaches for his briefcase and the cigar is no longer in his hand--it's in the ashtray without seeing him reach in the ashtray to place it there. Andre is going to come by tonight to ask Alice on what they should do to the apartment and the following morning, while Ralph is gone, Andre and his workers will redecorate the place. Ralph is not supposed to know about this, so this will be a big surprise when he gets home tomorrow night (Alice has rescheduled the party for tomorrow night, unbeknownst to Ralph). Isn't this like TLC's, "While You Were Out" program? Andre and Trixie leave. Alice gets into the bedroom. Ralph comes home, expecting a surprise party, but doesn't get anything. He is upset. Alice comes out and says that she will go upstairs to Trixie's. Ralph: "I will be up there when you need me." Alice doesn't know what he's talking about. Ralph starts to sing "Happy Birthday" and when Ed comes down, he dances with him a little bit. Ed says that there is no surprise party upstairs and the fact that Ralph didn't get one tonight, maybe the surprise is that Ralph will get no party. Ralph (yells): "GET OUT!"

Later on, Ralph is still home. Alice is waiting for Andre to come and for Ralph to go bowling. Ed comes down too. Ralph and Ed spot a man's glove (Andre's) in the dresser, so naturally Ralph thinks that Alice is cheating on him. Alice comes out all dressed up. She sarcastically says that Winston Churchill came over when Ralph was gone and she couldn't greet Winny in just anything but she doesn't explain to Ralph why she is wearing it again. She leaves the room and when Ed spots Andre's cigarette; he says that Alice might be correct.

Later on that night, Alice is getting worried that Ralph will be here when Andre will get here and that he will be late for bowling. Ed comes down all ready to bowl but Ralph isn't. He says that his home is being broken up. So, they will trick Alice to say that they are leaving and they go outside on the fire escape, and surprise the suspected Gigolo. They, off course, forget their bowling balls, so Ed goes down to get them. A knock is heard and Ed, being scared, thinks that's the guy, and leaves the balls there. Alice says to Andre that she is coming. While no one is in the room, Ralph gets the bowling balls and hits his head on the window. Ralph is all mad as he is standing outside with Ed. Andre comes in. Alice doesn't notice that the bowling balls on the kitchen table are now gone. Andre wants to get his glove that he left here that Ralph has unbeknownst to Alice and Andre. After hearing that Alice saying that Ralph would make things difficult for him if he got some input on the new design of the place. Ralph still doesn't know that the place will be redecorated and when Alice knows that the glove that Andre left is missing, Ralph yells: "HA HA!" When Ralph says "HA HA!!" out on the fire escape his hand goes right through what is supposed to be glass on the kitchen window. He says that he will kill Andre. Andre cancels her plans to redecorate the place after hearing that Ralph will kill him (despite the fact that he has no proof that he's her husband) and leaves. Alice explains everything to Ralph and that Ralph has ruined it. Ed leaves. Ralph apologizes to Alice. Ralph & Alice hug and kiss.

Credit I believe goes to the old Bill 'Mooners Archive, eBay.com, tv.com, Honeymooners Lost Episodes Book, tvguide.com, honeymooners.net, Honeymooners Box Set booklet Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD booklet, Yahoo! Groups You’re A Riot! & amazon.com.

[Frank Gannucci]

Bump