A Honeymooners Columbus Day:

[Frank Gannucci]

(Ralph & Ed are in a museum looking at drawings of Christopher Columbus and his boats.)

Ralph: "Look at these boats Norton. I would love to have been on those boats...if those boats had today's modern features."

Ed: "I would love to be on that boat any way you slice it because I love looking at water just like I do everyday on the job."

Ralph: "I wonder what Chris would think about the world right now considerating what we are all going through. This has been a hard year for me. Worst year of my life."

Ed: "Me too. But, I would love to be able to talk to Christopher Columbus. It would be an honor."

Ralph: "Me too."

Ed: "Are you sure the ship wouldn't sink if you are on it?"

Ralph: "Oh, you are asking for it Norton. You are going to get it Norton. But, I would love to have been there when he discovered America. I would love to hear what he thinks of Trump. Scratch that. I wouldn't love to hear what he thinks of Trump who I think is a BUM."

Ed: "We can all think that Christoper Columbus was a great man."

Ralph: "He certainly was."

(They both sing a song about Christopher Columbus being a great man.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. The Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Crowd cheers.)