View Today's Active Threads (No Chit Chat/Chit Chat Only) / View New Posts (No Chit Chat/Chit Chat Only) / Mark All Boards Read / Chit Chat Board
Chit Chat - Main Board / Games / Movies / Music / Sports / Video Games / Chit Chat - Classic / View Latest Threads in All Chit Chat Boards
![]() |
|
|||||||
![]() |
|
|
Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
|
|
#1 |
|
what up
Forum Star
Join Date: Jun 28, 2001
Location: Southwest Side, Chicago
Posts: 18,398
|
LOL. I found this at a sight and thought that some of them were so funny!
![]() 1.Adjust the tint on your tv so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way". 2.Drum on every available surface. 3.Sing the Batman theme incessantly. 4.Staple papers in the middle of the page. 5.Ask 1-800 operators for dates. 6.Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copy warnings. 7.Sew anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks. 8.Hide dairy products in inaccessible places. 9.Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page. 10.Specify that your drive-through order is "to go". 11.Set alarms for random times. 12.Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeeep Bip..." 13.Buy large quantities of mint dental floss just to lick the flavor off. 14.Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon. 15.Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train next Thanksgiving. 16.Leave your Nine Inch Nails tape in Great Uncle Ed's stereo, with the volume properly adjusted. 17.Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a "croaking" noise. 18.Honk and wave to strangers. 19.Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange. 20.Change channels five minutes before the end of every show. 21.Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies. 22.Wear your pants backwards. 23.Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complementary mints by the cash register. 24.Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!" 25.Rouse your roommates from slumber each morning with Lou Reed's "Metal Machine Music". 26.Leave someone's printer in compressed-italic-cyrillic-landscape mode. 27.ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE. only type in lowercase. dont use any punctuation either 28.Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets. 29.Pay for your dinner with pennies. 30.Tie jingle bells to all your clothes. 31.Repeat everything someone says, as a question. 32.Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in random spots on all of someone's roadmaps. 33.Inform everyone you meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ OJ Simpson conspiracy theories. 34.Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now." 35.Light road flares on a birthday cake. 36.Wander around the restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley. 37.Leave tips in Bolivian currency. 38.Demand that everyone address you as "Conquistador". 39.Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly. 40.At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks. 41.When Christmas caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, Batman smells" until physically restrained. 42.Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One". 43.As much as possible, skip rather than walk. 44.Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read. 45.Finish the 99 bottles of beer song. 46.Sing the "This is the song that never ends..." song. 47.Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles. 48.Pretend your mouse is a CB radio, and talk to it. 49.Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up", and repeat. 50.Drive half a block. 51.Name your dog "Dog". 52.Inform others that they exist only in your imagination. 53.Ask people what gender they are. 54.Reply to everything someone says with "that's what YOU think." 55.Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray. 56.Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern Drawl. 57.Forget the punchline to a long joke, but tell the listener it was a "real hoot". 58.Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that you don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes". 59.Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with a can of Lysol. 60.Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers' brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies' "Sugar" or the Mr. Rogers theme song. 61.While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet. 62.Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day. 63.Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. 64.Leave your Christmas lights up and lit until September. 65.Change your name to John Aaaaasmith for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each A. 66.Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. 67.Chew on pens that you've borrowed. 68.Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance. 69.Wear a LOT of cologne. 70.Ask to "interface" with someone. 71.Listen to 33 rpm records at 45 rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing". 72.Sing along at the opera. 73.Mow your lawn with scissors. 74.At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batatatatatata-suhWING-batter!" 75.Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy". 76.Ask the waitress for an extra seat for your "imaginary friend". 77.Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme. 78.Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles". 79.Incessantly recite annoying phrases, such as "sticky wicket isn't cricket." 80.Stare at static on the TV and claim you can see a "magic picture". 81.Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times. 82.Scuff your feet on a dry, shaggy carpet and seek out victims. 83.Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying more any moment. 84.Never make eye contact. Never break eye contact. 85.Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears. 86.Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn. 87.Construct your own pretend "tricorder";"scan" people with it, announcing the results. 88.Give a play-by-play account of a person's every action in a nasal Howard Cossell voice. 89.Holler random numbers while someone is counting. 90.Make appointments for the 31st of September. 91.Invite lots of people to other people's parties. |
|
|
|
|
|
#2 | |
|
Member
Forum Superstar
Join Date: Oct 11, 2001
Location: massachusetts
Posts: 34,145
|
Quote:
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#3 |
|
Member
Forum Veteran
|
Out of all of those, I actully do like 10 of them.
|
|
__________________
Det. Butler: Are you on any type of medication Mr. Bean? Mr. Bean: Not that I'm aware of... Det. Butler: Well...you could certainly use some... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#4 | |
|
peaceout.
Forum Icon
|
Quote:
He calls it making friends. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#5 | |
|
Member
Senior Member
|
Quote:
|
|
|
__________________
Good Charlotte![]() Me: JOEL!!! Can i have a picture with you? Joel: Sure, just let me sign everything first. *while hes talking he finished signing some other girls stuff and I gove him my ticket* Ya don't wanna miss anybody... Me: Ok *he signs a star and gives it back* Thank you. My mom: *while Joel was there* OMG DANA HE SPOKE TO YOU!!! I Love Benjamin Madden and Joel Madden Joel Benji Billy Paul Behold the power of Good Charlotte |
||
|
|
|
|
|
#6 | |
|
Member
Senior Member
|
Quote:
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
#7 |
|
Gone
Forum Star
Join Date: Oct 15, 2000
Posts: 19,086
|
Well, I do about 2 or 3 of these myself.
2.Drum on every available surface. (Yeah, do that one sometimes.) 3.Sing the Batman theme incessantly. (Do this one when I'm bored, but certainly not when anybody is around me) lol 55.Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back in the tray. (Only do this one a few times but I usually throw the cookie part out) lol |
|
|
|
|
|
#8 | |
|
Diamonds...
Forum 4000 Club Member
Join Date: Aug 24, 2001
Location: Where gentlemen actually prefer brunettes
Posts: 4,811
|
Quote:
|
|
|
__________________
the night we met. There was magic abroad in the air. There were angels dining at the Ritz. And a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square. |
||
|
|
|
|
|
#9 | |||||
|
Member
Forum Fanatic
Join Date: Feb 02, 2001
Posts: 10,254
|
Quote:
![]() Quote:
Quote:
![]() Quote:
Quote:
|
|||||
|
__________________
"To the world, you may be one person, but to one person, you may be the world." ~Unknown |
||||||
|
|
|
|
|
#10 |
|
Member
Forum Superstar
Join Date: Dec 16, 2001
Posts: 30,406
|
O ya i read that b4 & i did some of em
|
|
|
|
|
|
#11 | |
|
Certifiably Insane
Forum Veteran
Join Date: Dec 21, 2000
Location: I live in my hole...
Posts: 5,501
|
Quote:
Well, nine of those I've done before. A few I do on a regular basis. Oh well... ks |
|
|
__________________
"Ya gotta have a little faith." C.D. DeLerenzo |
||
|
|
|
|
|
#12 | |
|
asleep at the wheel
Forum 3000 Club Member
Join Date: Sep 30, 2000
Location: Helensburgh, Scotland
Posts: 3,726
|
Quote:
Funny list, BTW Chris!
|
|
|
__________________
"Heavy metal has been my life since I was 10 years old. It's the only thing I know, it's the only thing I care about." Dimebag Darrell, 1966 - 2004 |
||
|
|
|
|
|
#13 |
|
I'll Cover You
Forum Veteran
|
|
|
__________________
Don't you wanna be footloose and free? Well, you could be the life of the party If you were more- Like me! All you have to do is jump over the moon Moo with me! |
|
|
|
|
|
|
#14 |
|
I'll Cover You
Forum Veteran
|
Ya kno the annoying thing about that list?
They only go up to 91!! I mean, come on, use some creativity and come up with 9 more. I have one: 92.) Make a list 9 things away from 100.
|
|
|
|
|
|
#15 |
|
My favorite ladies!
Forum 4000 Club Member
|
LOL! Those are hreat! I do some of them too!
|
|
__________________
THE GOLDEN GIRLS! Sophia: (to Blanche) Fasten your seatbelt, slut puppie. This ain't gunna be no cakewalk. Blanche: I don't really mind Clayton being homosexual, I just don't like him dating men. Dorothy: You really haven't grasped the concept of this gay thing yet, have you? Blanche: There must be homosexuals who date women. Sophia: Yeah, they're called lesbians. JACOB |
|
|
|
|
![]() |
|
|