A Honeymooners Father's Day:

[Frank Gannucci]

(The Kramdens and Nortons are in the mall. Ralph & Ed look less than thrilled to be there.)

Alice: "Now Ralph, we are here to buy Father's Day gifts for Trixie's and my father."

Ralph: "Don't remind me Alice. You & Trixie forced me and Norton to come."

Ed: "I wanted to watch Captain Video and his Video Rangers as well as look at a live web cam of the New York sewers."

(Ralph rolls his eyes.)

Trixie: "Ed, you promised that you would come with us since we are also meeting our parents here at the mall to have lunch."

Ed: "All right. All right. Let's hope that Ralph doesn't eat the mall out of all the food."

Ralph: "Oh, you are going to get it Norton. You really are."

(They walk into Macys.)

Alice: "Trixie, take a look at all the Father's Day gifts."

Trixie: "Ed & Ralph, don't you two have to do Father's Day shopping?"

Ralph: "We already did. I got my Dad a card and so did Norton."

Ed: "As far as phycial gifts, we gave our Dads free membership into the Raccoons."

(The girls roll their eyes.)

Ralph: "Take a look at all these Father's Day gifts Norton."

Ed: "They are looking pretty good."

Ralph: "We are all lucky to have our parents with us."

Ed: "Yes sir. Since my father and my grandfather have been working in the sewer, I would love to see them look at the sewers of today."

Ralph: "I would like to have my father be younger."

Ed: "So would I. Maybe one day, the sewers will have a fountain of youth."

(Ralph rolls his eyes.)

Ralph: "Well, we all agree that fathers are great and it's great that we are celebrating Father's Day."

(They both sing a song about how great Father's Day is with shoppers [aka the June Taylor Dancers dancing in the background]).

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. The Miami Beach Father's Days are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Crowd cheers.)