"Life at Winterwood" (A Series)

[Sean Snow]

This show is (as of this episode) written by Sean (Burke Snow Winters), Lynn Marie (Demi Lynn Winters), Ben (Dr.Fraiser Crane), and last but certainly not least, JT (Er JT). This is show takes place in the house of Winterwood and the surrounding town of Wintersport. Burke Winters and Demi Winters, cousins, are the owners of Winterwood. Burke's wife, Millicent Winters, lives with there along with Burke's first wife, Victoria Winters Winters. Reese Collins and Maggie Winters are cousins of Burke and Demi's who live with them. Elizabeth Winters is Maggie's mother. The hired help includes Josette, the ever helping maid, Rosalina, the terrible chef, and Dinkins, the butler. Demi has therapy with Dr. Julia Hoffman. Her fellow patients are Roxie Hart and Velma Kelly. Carolyn Fredricks is a friend of the family who lives in Wintersport. Erica Haskell is also a friend of the family. Here is the first episode:

"Life at Winterwood"
Episode One
"The Night of the Homemade Pizza Hut Pizza"

Int Dining Hall
[Burke, Demi, Elizabeth, Maggie, and Reese are Sitting Down for Dinner]

Burke: I wish that Rosalina would hurry up with our food
Maggie: Hold yur horses!
Demi: I can't eat I'm to nervous anyway...
Elizabeth: I still think I'm a better cook.....
Burke: What's wrong Demi? Ever since your divorce you've been acting very funny.. *Maggie tries to hold in laughter*
Demi: Well tommorow is my first day in therapy and I heard that those people in that group are real weirdos
Rosalina: *hands out the dinner which is canned chicken soup*Everyone EAT!
Burke: They are I used to go to therapy and one of them set my underwear on fire-YAY! Finally Rosalina!
Reese: This isn't homeade soup...
Elizabeth: Rosalina, what is this?
Burke: It looks like toliet water..
Rosalina: Its homeade soup..
Demi: Ewww this looks spoiled...I'm definatly not hungry!
Burke: It doesn't look like it...

[Carolyn Enters]

Maggie: Was it made in a slum-style home or something?
Rosalina: You don't appreciate me *runs off crying*
Carolyn: Everyone I was just at the most MARVELOUS sale!
Reese: Great...*rolls his eyes*

[Dinkins comes in with car keys]

Carolyn: Hi Dinkins Can I have the keys? I love this family's hot rod
Dinkins: After dinner, I figured we can go to the sale.
Carolyn: Oh MARVELOUS!
Burke: Carolyn can you stop saying MARVELOUS!
Demi: You know Mac used to make me shop during sales....I HATED it
Carolyn: Well then don't come party pooper
Burke: Carolyn!
Rosalina: *in kitchen on the phone* Hello Is This Pizza Hut? Oh Yes I'd like to order a large cheese pizza...thank you..

[Josette the Maid Enters]

Carolyn: Hey what are you guys eating it looks like puke!
Josette: Would you like me to clear the table now?
Reese: It is puke
Burke: Er Josette you don't have to
Josette: but I am the maid
Reese: Well if you want to go ahead...
Burke: Go ahead then
Josette: Oh yes thank you...*Josette starts cleaning up the table*
Carolyn: Hey Josette do you wanna go crusin tomorrow to meet some hot guys?
Josette: Oh no I can't I have to work...
Burke: Josette you can go if you wish
Reese: why did we hire Rosalina anyways?
Josette: Really I would much rather be here working and paying off that room your letting me and Rosalina live in
Burke: Josette It's really alright..I dunno why we hired Rosalina she can't cook and she's probably calling Pizza Hut right now
Rosalina: *calls pizza hut* Could you deliver that pizza?
Josette: Well...I guess if you insist......
Burke: Good Josette you need to get out of the house.

[Millicent and Victoria Enter Fighting]

Victoria: You stole my man Burke!
Millicent: IT's not my fault you're a slut
Demi: Oh not again...
Victoria: If I was a slut then Burke owuld've kept me
Millicent: It's not my fault he divorced you Miss Slut!
Reese: why does this happen at dinner every night?
Demi: because this family is crazy
Reese: Yeah...
Maggie: Yur all sluts!
Liz: Maggie!
Burke: Yep this family iscrazy
Millicent: I am not a slut! *Slaps Maggie*
Burke: Honey don't do that
Reese: Your the one who divorced the slut Mr. Slut! *Phone rings*
Burke: What?! Why are you attacking me Reese?!
Reese: Sorry...i got caught up in the moment
Josette: I'll get it! *Answers phone*
Josette: Its for you Demi
Demi: For me? Who could it be...
Carolyn: Everyone do you want to see this groovy new dance?!

[Carolyn Starts Dancing]

Burke: Oh brotha...
Reese: Yeah you said it...
Josette: She claims to be your sister some slut name Bombalurina
Victoria: BOMBALURNIA?! OMG DEMI DON'T TALK TO HER!
Demi: Oh no! Tell her not to call Winterwood again!
Reese: ooo lala Bombalurina!
Millicent: Oh it's that slut? I remember her she's the one with the big-
Burke: Millicent
Reese: Big what? miracas?
Millicent: Cabasas
Demi: I wish she would stop bothering us...
Burke: Yeah I remember when she crashed our birthday party way back in 1990...
Demi: Wasn't she in porn back then?
Reese: yeah... pizza hut should be here any moment...
Burke: Yes I remember that movie..it was called "Kitty Cat"
Pizza Hut Dude: *ding dong*
Victoria: I smell pizza!
Rosalina: Its homeade too
Demi: Yes...I remember it well...Mac watched that film ten times
Burke: I cuaght Victoria watching it with him once
Victoria: That's not true!
Rosalina: *answers the door and sets the pizza on the table*
Millicent: I bet it is..oh yum pizza!
Josette: Oh Rosalina why can't you do your work like you are supposed to!
Carolyn: Hey gang can I have some?
Rosalina: *walks back into the kitchen*
Burke: Hymph that Rosalina is a real..real..blonde!
Reese: No Carolyn you can't have any...of course you can...
Carolyn: Oh thank you Reese *Kisses Reese on Cheek*
Reese: After that dance you deserve it
Carolyn: *giggles* Oh Reese
Demi: I don't know if I can eat this....I'm just so worried about therapy..if only I hadn't tried to kill Mac...
Burke: Too bad you didn't succede Demi
Demi: Yeah its a shame...
Reese: *smiles at Carolyn*
Carolyn: *Giggles* Don't look at me like that you're embarresing me Mister Collins!
Reese: Ok i'll stop...demi don't worry about therapy...the therapist is probably a wacko too
Millicent: Yeah Like that one woman that was my therapist when I tried to hang Victoria...Angelique
Reese: Oh thanks for bringing that up at dinner
Millicent: You're welcome even though I didn't think you'd want to hear bout it
Reese: Always a pleasure...
Victoria: Ignore that slutburger...I mean Millicent

*Hears the doorbell ring*

Josette: I'll get it!
Burke: That Josette is always willing to please
Reese: Its probably Bomba..at the door
Burke: Don't scare me Reese
Reese: or more pizza...
Carolyn: Oh Reese you're so funny! *Giggles*
Reese: Thanks...
Josette: Um Demeter....there are these two strange women at the door asking for you
Demi: Strange women? The only strange women I know are Millicent and Victoria...
Reese: Yeah...
Josette: They say their names are Roxie Hart and Velma Kelly

[Roxie and Velma walk in]

Roxie: Which one of you is Demeter?
Demi: Uh I am who are you?
Burke: OH no even more crazy people
Roxie: Roxie Hart and this is my friend Velma
Reese: Its like a dumping ground for crazy people
Velma: We wanted to meet you before therapy
Carolyn: *Laughs* I'm not crazy just perky!
Reese: I know Carolyn...
Demi: Oh are you going to be in my group?
Burke: Oh I feel sorry for Demi first she has to deal with Rosalina now crazies...
Millicent: And she has to deal with idiotic Victoria
Victoria: I am not an idiot you idiot!
Reese: And Millicent too
Velma: Yeah....we wanted to meet you to see if we would hate you
Millicent: WHAT?! *slaps Reese*
Reese: I'm only kidding pumpkin
Burke: Reese are you hitting on my wife?!
Roxie: Now we see that you are going to be liked just fine in our group...because I'm still the most beautiful
Velma: Your wrong about that Roxie I look better than you
Reese: No...I just call her pumpkin..
Burke: It seems like you two are flirting though!
Reese: I've called her that since forever..
Millicent: Since today you mean
Reese: Fine I'll call her carrot...
Roxie: Don't be silly Velma...I'm better looking and you know it

[Roxie and Velma Start Fighting as Victoria & Millicent Continue to Fight]

Burke: This is a nut house
Carolyn: No silly it's Winterwood!
Burke: SAme thing
Reese: Yeah...
Josette: EVERYBODY STOP!!!!!!!!!*Room is quiet*
Josette: Thank you...now I know I'm just a maid but you are all acting uncivilized
Dr. Julia Hoffman: *walks in* Its therapy time!
Demi: Tonight!?
Roxie: Yeah tonight what did you think?
Dr. Julia Hoffman: Yes...
Carolyn: Oh hello red head do you know a cure for a falling bust?
Julia: What?
Burke: CAROLYN!
Carolyn: I have a bust of George Washington at home adn it keeps falling
Demi: Listen I really don't need therapy
Julia: Fine I'll be back tommorow..but Demi your in the stage us therapists call denile...and you miss blondy i'll be watching you *leaves*
Demi: Just because I tried to kill my ex husband doesn't mean I'm crazy!
Burke: That's pretty normal for Winterwood
Victoria: Yeah I tried to kill Burke once when we were married
Reese: Yeah just like Rosalina's homeade pizza hut pizza
Roxie: Well I'm going back home you coming Velma?
Velma: Yeah sure this place is pretty boring anyway...
Millicent: Roxie where did you get that fab dress?
Reese: KMART! sorry...
Roxie: My fashion consultant found it for me
Reese: Peggy Aisle 12!
Carolyn: Oh Reese you're so funny! *Giggles*

[Velma & Roxie Leave]

Reese: I've had too much to drink
Carolyn: Hey Reese do you wanna go to the Red Fish Pub with me for a drink or three?
Reese: Make It Four...
Carolyn: Alright Let's go then! Bye Millicent!
Reese: Bye Everyone

[Reese & Carolyn Leave]

Josette: Well this place is a mess again....
Burke: Demi did you ever notice that Reese and Carolyn are waaay to perky?
Demi: Aren't they always way to perky?
Burke: I wish I could be perky it's so depressing being me
Demi: At least you aren't a phsyco and have a slutty sister
Rosalina: *walks out into the dining room* Hello Everyone
Burke: Hi Rosalina You're homemade pizza hut pizza was great
Victoria: It was fab!
Rosalina: Thanks you
Millicent: GRr Vicki that's my line!
Victoria: I don't care slut
Josette: How about you help me clean this room up Rosalina?
Rosalina: Girls stop fighting! Sure Josie..
Rosalina: *starts to clean*
Millicent: I don't wanan stop fighting! This bimbo says I was the one who broke up her marriage with Burke
Maggie: *Wakes Up* Wow....that soup is bound to make anyone fall asleep.
Elizabeth: No wonder you were silent.
Victoria: Maggie you missed the pizza
Liz: Both of you are sluts!
Maggie: Damn straight.
Millicent: It's not pizza it's home made pizza hut pizza..I've had enough! Burke make Liz move out!
Josette: Rosalina what are you doing!?
Burke: But she's older then me..
Rosalina: I'm cleaning
Josette: You call that Cleaning!?
Dinkins: Let's just go to the Wintersport Department Store sale!
Millicent: It's no fun without Carolyn
Rosalina: I'm a chef you dingbat! what do i know?
Josette: You may be a chef but your terrible at that too!
Rosalina: *runs off into the kitchen crying* Well Your a bimbo!
Millicent: Everyone who wants to come with me to The Red Fish Pub?
Maggie: Do what?
Rosalina: *walks out of the kitchen* I'll come to the pub...
Josette: Nevermind she won't
Millicent: Go to The red Fish Pub! Duh Maggie
Burke: I'll go...Josette you should come you're such a good worker
Maggie: But you said "Everybody who wants to go to the Red Fish Pub?"
Millicent: Maggie sometimes I think you should dye your hair blonde!
Rosalina: Millicent, do you mind if i tag along?
Millicent: No not at all
Maggie: I do.
Burke: Demi do you want to come?
Demi: allright
Rosalina: Maggie your stupid...
Liz: I'll stay home.....The Gloria Vanderbilt Story comes on tonight....

Int Red Fish Pub
[Demi, Burke, Rosalina, Josette, & Maggie Enter. Carolyn and Reese are Drinking at a Table]

Maggie: Umm....wanna play darts?
Erica: Maggie!
Maggie: Erica!
Erica: Ewww.....you filthy drunk pig!
Reese: *drunk* Carolyn I love you!!!
Carolyn: Reese! Really?!
Burke: You two are just in toxicated
Josette: Burke I'm scared!
Reese: *drunk* yeah..
Carolyn: I'm not Justin Toxicated! I'm Carolyn
Burke: It's alright Josette
Carolyn: Reese if I turned into a nun who ate flying fish would you still drink at this pub with me?
Reese: No way...just kidding of course I would...
Maggie: Flying Nun?! I love that show!

[Roxie and Velma Walk In]

Burke: It's the crazies
Carolyn: Hey Reese I can fly! *Stands Up on Stool and Falls Off* Owww
Roxie: Well look who is here
Demi: Oh hi Roxie
Reese: Thats awesome thats like so totally awesome Caroline
Burke: Hello Roxie, Velma, I'm Burke Witners
Carolyn: It's Carolyn not Caroline
Velma: Yeah we've met
Reese: Ok Carrie
Carolyn: Yep that's right Rex
Maggie: Caroline rhymes with Cassidine...and they are from General Hospital....
Carolyn: Oh it's Magot
Maggie: Magot?
Reese: Hey Carol wanna go for a walk?
Velma: Demi admit your crime
Burke: Demi I'm scared everyone here is either crazy or just intorixacted
Demi: me too...
Josette: I'm scared as well
Carolyn: I'm not Justin Toxicated I'm Carolyn! Alright Let's go Reese I can show you my new dance
Maggie: No one wants to play darts with me!
Burke: I'll play Maggie
Reese: Sure Lets Go...*takes carolyn's hand*
Carolyn: Oh Reese that's not proper! But I don't care..
Roxie: Demi admit what you did...

[Reese and Carolyn Leave the Red Fish Hand in Hand]

Burke: Yes Demi admit your crime--wait what did she do
Demi: I didn't do anything...just because I tried to kill my husband...
Roxie: Thats it!
Maggie: Was the crime bigger than a bread box?
Velma: she tried to kill her husband...I'm sorry you didn't actually kill him Demi
Rosalina: Yes!
Maggie: You tried to kill your husband?!
Maggie: You shoulda be sent so Winters' Hill to be assasinated!
Millicent: Hey everyone let's sing a song! I love you, you love me, we're
Burke: MILLICENT STOP IT YOU MIGHT START A SCANDAL!
Josette: Thats not nice Maggie!
Rosalina: I'm going back to Winterwood I'll start on breakfast I'm making homemade Denny's Hotcakes
Burke: That's great Rosalina
Maggie: She's been watching Barney again......no wonder my timer recorder never works for All My Children....

[Rosalina Leaves]

Burke: Maggie why don't you play darts with Erica?

[Erica leaves]

Maggie: Because she left.
Burke: Oh alright...Let's throw darts. You go first
Roxie: Listen Demi...its okay...I mean I killed the man that I was having an affair with and became famous
Velma: and I killed my sister and husband
Roxie: We turned out okay
[Maggie Throws a Dart that Hits Burke in the HEad. Burke Falls to the Floor]
All: BURKE!
THE END

CAST:
Burke Winters...
SEAN

Demi Winters...
LYNN

Reese Collins...
BEN

Maggie Winters...
JT

Carolyn Fredricks...
SEAN

Josette duPres...
LYNN

Rosalina duPres...
BEN

Dinkins...
JT

Millicent Winters...
SEAN

Roxie Hart...
LYNN

Julia Hoffman...
BEN

Elizabeth Winters...
JT

Velma Kelly...
LYNN

Erica Haskell...
JT

and
SEAN
as
Victoria Winters Winters

Based on RPs by Lynn and Sean