Honeymooners Episode Reviews: "6 Months To Live" ('53)/"Manager of The Baseball Team"

[Frank Gannucci]

Honeymooners Episode Reviews: "Six Months To Live" ('53) & "Manager of The Baseball Team" ('57):

Episode #165
DVD: Still lost.
Air Date: Sat. 5/11/57

"Six Months To Live" ('53):

I haven't seen the 1957 version, but I do have the earlier version. I am assuming that it's one and the same for the most part.

Alice is home. Trixie visits. Alice is talking about her mother's dog being sick and having to be taken to the doctor. It costs Alice $10. It was more expensive to have the doctor give the dog a check-up then it did Ralph when he recently visited the doctor.

Ralph and Ed come in. Ed wants a kiss from Trixie. But she says no. One of the reasons is that he worked in the sewer all day. Trixie goes upstairs. Ralph tells a story that while he was on the bus today, he met a man who said that he was George Washington. The man annoyed Ralph and the customers for a while so Ralph got him off the bus by stopping sand saying: ‘This Is Valley Forge.’” Alice leaves to go get the wash. Ed asks Ralph if he wants to go see a movie tonight. Ralph says no. He thinks that there is something wrong with him since he went to the doctor. The telegram is sent in. Ralph gets the telegram from the delivery man and when the man holds out his hand expecting a tip, Ralph says: "Your hand is very dirty." Ralph: “I hope there is something wrong with me. That way, I can go down to Paul’s Landing and do some fishing.” Doesn’t Ralph know that when you are sick and have to stay at home from your job, you shouldn’t go on vacation? Ralph reads the telegram aloud to Ed. Ralph: “A severe case of manochromia exists. This is the type of disease that normally affects Boxers. The signs are: blue tongue, hair falling out and irritability. Keep him away from your mother as people will become vulnerable to the disease he is carrying." He continues reading the telegram. Ralph thinks that the letter is about him and he is dying. Ed: "Doctors can be wrong to you know. Take a friend of mine, the doctor gave him six months to live. He lived for almost eight months." Ralph blames the disease on his job. Ralph: “I am headed up to that big bus depot in the sky.” Ralph thought he would never go out this way. It’s been a real struggle ever since he was born according to him. He can’t believe the way he is going out. Ed leave, but not after asking Ralph what size bowling shoes he wears.

Alice comes down. She sings: “I am walking alone.” Ralph (yells): “WILL YOU STOP SINGING THAT SONG?” Alice doesn’t comply and if she wanted to, she will sing it for the next six months. Ralph looks at his tongue in the mirror to see if it is blue. Ralph: “I just want to look at my tongue.” Alice: “Why don’t you go down to the butcher’s? They have a lot of them.” After that, he asks for a saucer of warm milk and he wants it in his bedroom. Alice: “One of these days, they are going to take you away.” Ralph: “That is right.” Ralph wants Alice to sit down. Ralph wants to talk to her. Ralph: “I want a man-to-man conversation with you. He talks about would she marry another guy if Ralph died. Alice: “No, unless the right guy came along and I was lonely.” Ralph can’t blame her because she is in the prime of life and he is going to die soon. He then talks about what it would be like if she met another guy after Ralph died. Ralph: “When I die, bury me in my overcoat.” Alice: “Don’t worry. You are strong as a horse.” Ralph: “I suppose you never saw a dead horse.” Alice: “Now that you mentioned it, there is a resemblance.” Ralph: “You try to steam me. YOU GOT ME STEAMED. I tried to save you some aggravation. Read that (the telegram.)” She does. She laughs uncontrollably while Ralph thinks that she has no heart. Alice tells him that he is not dying and this telegram is for mom's dog. She explains the significance of the telegram. Ralph is happy that he is not dying after all. He and Alice laugh together. Ralph: “You are married to the World’s No. 1 Maniac.” Alice: “I love my maniac.” They hug and kiss.

Episode #166
TV: In 2019, the future Catchy Comedy channel started showing this episode. It is attached to the 1952 version of "Quiz Show."
VCR: Attached to "Hero" on some volume 28 tapes.
DVD: On disc 15 of the Lost Episodes Restored DVD box set, it is attached to “Curse of The Kramdens”, “Mad Dogs & Englishmen”, “Framed In Spain” & “I Remember Mau Au.”
Air Date: Sat. 6/1/57

“Manager of The Baseball Team" ('57):

Before I start this review, let me say this. MPI has received a lot of complaints about accidentally attaching the 1953 version to "Hero" (where on the box, it advertises the 1957 version). They also have gotten a lot of complaints when they accidentally attached the 1953 episode to the DVD release that has "Teamwork Beats The Clock", "Quiz Show" & "The Wit & Wisdom of Ed Norton" (where once again on the box, it advertises the 1957 version.) MPI probably did it by mistake since the both versions of this episode are very much alike. In 2002, I managed to get the MPI cassette Vol. 28 that has the 1957 version of this episode (even though some versions of Vol. 28 have the '53 version on it.) There are very few differences between the '57 version and the '53 version.

The episode opens up with Alice worrying about where Ralph is. Ed and Trixie come down. Alice says that she is worried about Ralph. He was supposed to come home a while ago. So, Trixie asks Ed to go outside and come back when he comes home. Ed says no because what's going to happen if he is in the hospital, he would have stayed out for nothing. Ed also says that because Ralph is married, he probably ran away. Ha! That's a very nice thing to say. Ed brings up a story about what happened to a person he knew. That person ran away and when the cops asked him questions, he didn't know anything. He was 3 years old. Ha!

Ralph comes home and has champagne for everyone. In fact, in the 1953 version of this episode, Ralph tires to open the bottle, but has a hard time doing so. That wasn't supposed to happen, so to cover it up, he says: "We will be drinking champagne if I can ever get this bottle open." He does. Ralph says that he is now the new manager of the Gotham Bus Depot. He always knew that he had the right qualifications. Yeah, sure he did. When Alice asks Ralph, how he found out, Ralph says he heard it while walking by the president of the bus company's office. He later hears that a telegram will come tonight to confirm the whole thing. Ralph mentions that with him becoming the manager, he might even become the president. When he does become president, he's going to make some changes like having pretty stewardess on each bus and to make sure that those people who happened to miss the bus by one minute; he's going to make sure every bus starts a minute late. Question: Wouldn't that rule make some people a little angry that they might be one minute late to go to whatever they are going to? Just a thought. Ralph says that the salary he gets for being a manager is big. He says that with the money, he and Alice are going to go on a second honeymoon with Ed and Trixie and that Alice is going to get that bunion removed off her foot.

After Ralph leaves, the telegram arrives saying that Ralph has become the manager all right. The manager of the Gotham City Baseball Team. Alice, Ed, and Trixie are all upset thinking that Ralph was becoming manager of the company and that all the plans that Ralph had for becoming president were not going to come to fruition for a while.

Ralph comes home and mentions about the respect Alice will get when she goes down to the store Ralph was just at. Ralph also says that now that he's in the money, should he and Alice move out of this joint. He later says no. That place has been awful lucky to them. Yeah, sure it has. Alice presents Ralph with the telegram and when Ralph reads it he' disappointed and apologizes to Alice. Alice says that Ralph is the most important thing in her life. They hug and kiss.

When I rented the video entitled: "Cupid/Manager of The Baseball Team (1953 version)" in 1996, I originally thought I was going to get a thirty-minute episode of Ralph being the baseball manager. (Imagine how funny that would be.) You can imagine my disappointment when I found out that the episode was less than fifteen minutes long.

Credit I think goes to (the original) Bill's 'Mooners Archives, eBay.com, tv.com, Honeymooners Lost Episodes Book, tvguide.com, honeymooners.net, Honeymooners Lost Episodes DVD booklet, Wikipedia.org, Yahoo Groups You're A Riot! & Amazon.com.

[Frank Gannucci]

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