A Honeymooners Election Day: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 11-04-2017, 08:56 AM

(Ralph & Ed are walking toward the polling booths.)

Ed: "Hey Ralph, it's too bad that last year was a U.S. Presidential election and we have to wait until 2020."

Ralph: "Yeah, like you Norton, I think those elections are the best. Our current president could be the most loved President of all time and it would make no difference to us."

Ed: "Who are we going to vote for Ralph for assembly?"

Ralph: "I got a great candidate in my mind. Alice is pulling for the opposition. Her opponent wants to clean out all the slums and wants to improve the roads here. Our candidate is approved by the poolroom, the bowling alley and the Raccoon Lodge. Who is against our candidate? The teacher's association, the libraries etc."

Ed: "I mean who are they? They are a bunch of nobodies."

Ralph: "That is true Norton. When we get to the voting booth Norton, I will show you which button to press."

Ed: "Are you sure that YOU will fit into the booth Ralph-ie boy?"

Ralph: "Oooooooh, you are going to get a fat lip Norton."

(They arrive at the voting booth.)

Ralph: "I will fill this out. Than, we are going into the booth."

Woman: "Are you sure sir that you will fit into the booth?"

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (to Ed, yells): "SHUT UP!"

(Ralph fills out the paperwork and both of them go into the booth.)

Ed: "Hey Ralph, what does this button do?"

(Ed presses the button for the wrong candidate.)

Ralph (yells): "YOU STUPID STUPE! YOU PRESSED THE BUTTON FOR THE WRONG CANDIDATE. NOW, WE ARE SCREWED."

Ed (yells): "RALPH, MAYBE THE CANDIDATE WILL DO US A LOT OF GOOD."

(Ralph charges out.)

Ralph: "Sir, I would like to retract our vote and change it."

Man: "Can't do that sir."

Ralph: "But, I got to."

Man: "Rules are rules. Maybe if you weren't so fat, your stomach wouldn't have pressed the wrong button."

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): "OKAY NORTON! LET'S GO! LET'S GO!"

(People try to separate the two and calm them down.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. Happy Election Day!"

(Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "As usual, the Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Crowd cheers.)

11-04-2017, 08:56 AM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,071	A Honeymooners Election Day: (Ralph & Ed are walking toward the polling booths.) Ed: "Hey Ralph, it's too bad that last year was a U.S. Presidential election and we have to wait until 2020." Ralph: "Yeah, like you Norton, I think those elections are the best. Our current president could be the most loved President of all time and it would make no difference to us." Ed: "Who are we going to vote for Ralph for assembly?" Ralph: "I got a great candidate in my mind. Alice is pulling for the opposition. Her opponent wants to clean out all the slums and wants to improve the roads here. Our candidate is approved by the poolroom, the bowling alley and the Raccoon Lodge. Who is against our candidate? The teacher's association, the libraries etc." Ed: "I mean who are they? They are a bunch of nobodies." Ralph: "That is true Norton. When we get to the voting booth Norton, I will show you which button to press." Ed: "Are you sure that YOU will fit into the booth Ralph-ie boy?" Ralph: "Oooooooh, you are going to get a fat lip Norton." (They arrive at the voting booth.) Ralph: "I will fill this out. Than, we are going into the booth." Woman: "Are you sure sir that you will fit into the booth?" (Ed laughs.) Ralph (to Ed, yells): "SHUT UP!" (Ralph fills out the paperwork and both of them go into the booth.) Ed: "Hey Ralph, what does this button do?" (Ed presses the button for the wrong candidate.) Ralph (yells): "YOU STUPID STUPE! YOU PRESSED THE BUTTON FOR THE WRONG CANDIDATE. NOW, WE ARE SCREWED." Ed (yells): "RALPH, MAYBE THE CANDIDATE WILL DO US A LOT OF GOOD." (Ralph charges out.) Ralph: "Sir, I would like to retract our vote and change it." Man: "Can't do that sir." Ralph: "But, I got to." Man: "Rules are rules. Maybe if you weren't so fat, your stomach wouldn't have pressed the wrong button." (Ed laughs.) Ralph (yells): "OKAY NORTON! LET'S GO! LET'S GO!" (People try to separate the two and calm them down.) (Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.) Jackie: "Thank you. Happy Election Day!" (Crowd cheers.) Jackie: "As usual, the Miami Beach crowds are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!" (Crowd cheers.)