A Honeymooners Labor Day: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 09-02-2016, 07:50 AM

A Honeymooners Labor Day:

(Ralph & Ed are having a barbeque at the pool room.)

Ed: “Boy, what a great way to celebrate Labor Day Ralphie. I can’t believe that summer is almost over.”

Ralph: “Me neither. It goes by too fast.”

Ed: “I am going to miss playing basketball with all the neighborhood kids.”

Ralph: “You certainly are a kid Norton.”

(Harvey & George walk by.)

Harvey: “Look at what we have here. It looks like Ralph is going to get fatter.”

(George laughs.)

Ralph: “I believe you are jealous that I am getting all the attention here.”

Harvey: “Oh yeah? How about me & George get our own grill, bring it over here and we will have a cookoff?”

Ed: “That sounds fine.”

(Ralph is upset.)

Harvey: “Come on George. After tonight, we will celebrate the fruits of our labor by getting drunk.”

(They leave.)

Ed (yells): “APOX ON YOU AND YOUR ANCESTERS” (normally): “Ralph, why did you have to agree to a cookoff with that guy for?”

Ralph (yells): “YOU ARE A MENTAL CASE.” (normally): “Now, I have to have a cookoff.”

Ed: “Without having to eat the food yourself.”

Ralph (yells): “YOU ARE GOING TO GET IT NORTON.”

(Later on, Harvey & George come by with the grill and have a cookoff with Ralph & Ed. Smoke is billowing everywhere. People are coughing due to everyone cooking food badly. Ralph & Ed are coughing very loudly.)

Ralph: “It pays to buy the best. It looks like my burnt hotdogs are much better than Harveys.”

Ed: “Yeah but Harvey’s burgers are better than yours.”

(Ralph slaps Ed.)

Man: “What smoke. I am leaving. This is the worst Labor Day ever due to these four nutcases.”

Ralph (yells): “IF YOU CAN’T STAND THE SMOKE, GET OUT OF HERE.”

Man #2 (yells): “WHEN DID YOU FOUR NUTS ESCAPE. WE ARE ALL LEAVING.”

(Another man comes by with pails of water.)

Man #3 (yells): “TIME TO PUT THE FIRE OUT.”

(He accidentally douses Ralph. Ed laughs.)

Man #3 (yells): “SORRY SIR.”

(The fire department comes.)

Ed: “Ralph, looks like your plan to win the cookoff, got all wet.”

Ralph (yells): “GET OUT! GET OUT! GEEEEEEEEEEEEEET OUT!”

(Ed leaves.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: “Thank you. The Miami Beach Labor Days are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!”

(Crowd cheers.)

09-02-2016, 07:50 AM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,097	A Honeymooners Labor Day: A Honeymooners Labor Day: (Ralph & Ed are having a barbeque at the pool room.) Ed: “Boy, what a great way to celebrate Labor Day Ralphie. I can’t believe that summer is almost over.” Ralph: “Me neither. It goes by too fast.” Ed: “I am going to miss playing basketball with all the neighborhood kids.” Ralph: “You certainly are a kid Norton.” (Harvey & George walk by.) Harvey: “Look at what we have here. It looks like Ralph is going to get fatter.” (George laughs.) Ralph: “I believe you are jealous that I am getting all the attention here.” Harvey: “Oh yeah? How about me & George get our own grill, bring it over here and we will have a cookoff?” Ed: “That sounds fine.” (Ralph is upset.) Harvey: “Come on George. After tonight, we will celebrate the fruits of our labor by getting drunk.” (They leave.) Ed (yells): “APOX ON YOU AND YOUR ANCESTERS” (normally): “Ralph, why did you have to agree to a cookoff with that guy for?” Ralph (yells): “YOU ARE A MENTAL CASE.” (normally): “Now, I have to have a cookoff.” Ed: “Without having to eat the food yourself.” Ralph (yells): “YOU ARE GOING TO GET IT NORTON.” (Later on, Harvey & George come by with the grill and have a cookoff with Ralph & Ed. Smoke is billowing everywhere. People are coughing due to everyone cooking food badly. Ralph & Ed are coughing very loudly.) Ralph: “It pays to buy the best. It looks like my burnt hotdogs are much better than Harveys.” Ed: “Yeah but Harvey’s burgers are better than yours.” (Ralph slaps Ed.) Man: “What smoke. I am leaving. This is the worst Labor Day ever due to these four nutcases.” Ralph (yells): “IF YOU CAN’T STAND THE SMOKE, GET OUT OF HERE.” Man #2 (yells): “WHEN DID YOU FOUR NUTS ESCAPE. WE ARE ALL LEAVING.” (Another man comes by with pails of water.) Man #3 (yells): “TIME TO PUT THE FIRE OUT.” (He accidentally douses Ralph. Ed laughs.) Man #3 (yells): “SORRY SIR.” (The fire department comes.) Ed: “Ralph, looks like your plan to win the cookoff, got all wet.” Ralph (yells): “GET OUT! GET OUT! GEEEEEEEEEEEEEET OUT!” (Ed leaves.) (Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.) Jackie: “Thank you. The Miami Beach Labor Days are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!” (Crowd cheers.)