A Honeymooners Easter: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 03-24-2016, 07:08 AM

A Honeymooners Easter:

(Ralph & Ed are in the Kramden apartment. They are coloring Easter eggs.)

Ralph: “Boy, this was a great idea I had Norton. We are going to color
Easter eggs for a contest in which the best looking eggs win us $10,000 each.”

Ed: “I feel like a kid again Ralph. We are going to win.”

Ralph: “Alice was actually thrilled about this.”

Ed: “You know something? We should present our eggs wearing Easter
Bunny costumes.”

Ralph: “That is a good idea.”

Ed: “The only thing is where will we find one big enough for you?”

Ralph: “Oooooh! YOU’RE A RIOT NORTON! A REAL RIOT!”

Ed: “Well, the eggs are almost done.”

Ralph: “Don’t say a word Norton. I’m finishing the last egg. I got it. I got it.”

(Trixie comes in.)

Trixie (scaring Ralph): “Hi Ralph.”

Ed: “Be quiet Trixie. Ralph is just finishing the egg here.”

Ralph: “Look at what you did Trix. I messed up a little bit.”

Trixie: “Sorry Ralph. Where’s Alice?”

Ralph: “She is right in the bedroom.”

Trixie: “Alice, do you have the eggs for the contest?”

Alice (coming out): “I do Trix.”

Ralph (yells): “WHAT?”

Alice: “Ralph, when you told us that you and Ed are entering the coloring Easter eggs contest, we decided to enter.”

Ralph: “You will do nothing of the kind.”

Alice: “Why not?”

Ralph: “Because I don’t want you too. That’s why. You don’t know how to color eggs.”

Alice: “I don’t know how to color eggs? Might I remind you Ralph, last year
when you and I colored eggs, your eggs were terrible while mine were perfect.”

Ed: “That might be because that Ralph took a bite out of his.”

Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!” (to Alice): “All right. Go ahead and enter and not only will we beat you but we think that you two will be laying eggs.”

Alice: “Really?”

Ralph: “Yes. I am going to put my eggs in the bedroom.”

(Ralph goes into the bedroom with the eggs.)

Alice: “Oh Ralph, I’m sorry. I forgot to mop the floor. There is water.”

Ralph (slipping,
yells): “DUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

(Eggs splatter.)

Ed: “Ralph, it looks like YOU got egg all over your face.”

Ralph (coming out, yells): “GET OUT! GET OUT! GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET OUT!”

(The next scene, the girls are at the contest.)

Alice: “Ralph & Ed, you two look ridiculous with those costumes.”

(Ralph & Ed enter in Easter bunny costumes. The audience laughs.)

Ralph: “Shows you how much you know. We got dressed for the occasion.
It’s time for the unveiling.”

Man (on the mic, yells): “THE WINNER IS…THE GIBSONS”

Ralph (yells): “WHAT? YOUR MOTHER WON?”

Alice’s Mom (on the mic, yells): “HIYA SONNY BOY!! I AM GLAD THAT YOU DIDN’T EAT ALL THE EGGS.”

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): “NORTON, PUT ‘EM UP! PUT ‘EM UP!”

(The boys fight with everyone trying to make peace.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: “Thank you. Happy Easter. The Miami Beach EASTERS are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!”

(Crowd cheers.)

03-24-2016, 07:08 AM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,094	A Honeymooners Easter: A Honeymooners Easter: (Ralph & Ed are in the Kramden apartment. They are coloring Easter eggs.) Ralph: “Boy, this was a great idea I had Norton. We are going to color Easter eggs for a contest in which the best looking eggs win us $10,000 each.” Ed: “I feel like a kid again Ralph. We are going to win.” Ralph: “Alice was actually thrilled about this.” Ed: “You know something? We should present our eggs wearing Easter Bunny costumes.” Ralph: “That is a good idea.” Ed: “The only thing is where will we find one big enough for you?” Ralph: “Oooooh! YOU’RE A RIOT NORTON! A REAL RIOT!” Ed: “Well, the eggs are almost done.” Ralph: “Don’t say a word Norton. I’m finishing the last egg. I got it. I got it.” (Trixie comes in.) Trixie (scaring Ralph): “Hi Ralph.” Ed: “Be quiet Trixie. Ralph is just finishing the egg here.” Ralph: “Look at what you did Trix. I messed up a little bit.” Trixie: “Sorry Ralph. Where’s Alice?” Ralph: “She is right in the bedroom.” Trixie: “Alice, do you have the eggs for the contest?” Alice (coming out): “I do Trix.” Ralph (yells): “WHAT?” Alice: “Ralph, when you told us that you and Ed are entering the coloring Easter eggs contest, we decided to enter.” Ralph: “You will do nothing of the kind.” Alice: “Why not?” Ralph: “Because I don’t want you too. That’s why. You don’t know how to color eggs.” Alice: “I don’t know how to color eggs? Might I remind you Ralph, last year when you and I colored eggs, your eggs were terrible while mine were perfect.” Ed: “That might be because that Ralph took a bite out of his.” Ralph (yells): “SHUT UP!” (to Alice): “All right. Go ahead and enter and not only will we beat you but we think that you two will be laying eggs.” Alice: “Really?” Ralph: “Yes. I am going to put my eggs in the bedroom.” (Ralph goes into the bedroom with the eggs.) Alice: “Oh Ralph, I’m sorry. I forgot to mop the floor. There is water.” Ralph (slipping, yells): “DUUUUUUUUUUUUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” (Eggs splatter.) Ed: “Ralph, it looks like YOU got egg all over your face.” Ralph (coming out, yells): “GET OUT! GET OUT! GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET OUT!” (The next scene, the girls are at the contest.) Alice: “Ralph & Ed, you two look ridiculous with those costumes.” (Ralph & Ed enter in Easter bunny costumes. The audience laughs.) Ralph: “Shows you how much you know. We got dressed for the occasion. It’s time for the unveiling.” Man (on the mic, yells): “THE WINNER IS…THE GIBSONS” Ralph (yells): “WHAT? YOUR MOTHER WON?” Alice’s Mom (on the mic, yells): “HIYA SONNY BOY!! I AM GLAD THAT YOU DIDN’T EAT ALL THE EGGS.” (Ed laughs.) Ralph (yells): “NORTON, PUT ‘EM UP! PUT ‘EM UP!” (The boys fight with everyone trying to make peace.) (Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.) Jackie: “Thank you. Happy Easter. The Miami Beach EASTERS are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!” (Crowd cheers.)