A Honeymooners Valentine's Day:

[Frank Gannucci]

(Ralph & Ed are carrying a HUGE box of Valentine's chocolates for Alice. They are walking down Madison Avenue.)

Ralph: "Come on Norton. You can make it."

Ed: "This box is heavy Ralph. Why couldn't we get another person to help us out?"

Ralph: "Who?"

Ed: "How about Alice?"

(Ralph looks at Ed in a stern fashion.)

Ralph: "Really? Seriously?"

Ed: "Yeah. This way we can get some assistance. Oh!"

Ralph: "OH! OH!"

Ed: "I just had a bout of stupidity."

Ralph: "You always do. Come on. Let's get this thing on the bus."

(They do. They arrive in front of 328 Chauncey Street.)

Ralph: "Boy, the amount of anger we got on the bus for carrying this thing was absurd."

Ed: "You think they would get used to this. Next time we do this Ralph, we ought to use the sewer."

(Ralph rolls his eyes.)

(They carry that huge box up the stairs. People notice.)

McGarrity (yells): "HEY KRAMDEN! I HOPE ALICE EATS SOME OF THAT BEFORE YOU CONSUME IT ALL."

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): "SHUT UP NORTON! THIS IS FOR ALICE MCGARRITY. YOU WOULD LOVE TO EAT CHOCOLATES IF YOU WERE ALLOWED."

(They finally arrive at the Kramden apartment. Alice isn't there.)

Ralph: "Alice isn't here. She will be so surprised."

Ed: "She will be surprised when she finds out that you didn't eat any of the chocolates yet."

Ralph: "Oh, you are going to get it Norton."

(Alice & Alice's Mom arrive.)

Alice: "Ralph, it is beautiful."

Alice's Mom: "Well Sonny Boy, I hope you don't eat this all for yourself like all of the world thinks."

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph: "You're a riot Mom! A real riot!"

Alice: "Thank you Ralph. Happy Valentine's Day!"

(They hug and kiss.)

Ed: "How beautiful."

(Ed sniffs as he accidentally pushes the box of chocolates onto Ralph's foot.)

Ralph (yells): "OOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! ALL RIGHT NORTON! LET'S GO!"

(Ralph chases after Ed while the rest run after them in hopes of making peace between them.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "Thank you. I just want to wish everyone a Happy Valentine's Day!"

(Crowd cheers.)

Jackie: "The Miami Beach Valentine's Days are the best. GOOD NIGHT!"

(Crowd cheers.)