When adoption goes wrong

[Dude111]

Most who adopt children from other countries find joy. But others arent prepared for the risks—and may find themselves overwhelmed..

http://web.archive.org/web/200712101...k.com/id/74385

Very sad.........

[Steve_uk]

Originally Posted by Dude111

Most who adopt children from other countries find joy. But others arent prepared for the risks—and may find themselves overwhelmed..

http://web.archive.org/web/200712101...k.com/id/74385

Very sad.........

Yes very. It reminds me of the film Child of Rage.

[Wawwie]

As "Kramer" from "Seinfeld" said, "apparently, adoption leads to murder."

[Dude111]

People should be checked out more carefully before they are allowed to adopt!

[um]

I think there was another discussion about adoption, and I posted that my father constantly told me throughout my life that it is never a good idea to adopt a child because adopted children always have problematic behavior.
I thought that his words were strange because if no one adopted children more than half the population of the world would be in orphanages or children's homes all their young lives. My dad said that adopted children have an inherent knowledge in them that their adopted parents are not their real parents and resent it deeply and will just act out.

This link you posted is of a particularly tragic story and it is probably very complicated as far as the psychology. Even if the adoptive mother was holding in her anger all the time she dealt with her difficult adopted daughter, it seems too extreme that when the adoptive mother finally broke down she got as violent as she did. There just had to be some thing inherently psychotic in the mother and I wonder if the adoption agency fully thought over giving the child to the adoptive mother and whether they ignored something strange in the personality of the mother. It might not be that the child was just, out-of-nowhere , doing things like throwing things and shouting, and causing disruption. The child might have somehow been psychologically or physically mistreated by the adoptive mother, or maybe someone in the household. Also, though I read quickly through the article, I did not see anything about getting any kind of psychological help for the child throughout the time that the child showed such strongly distressed behavior.
Of course the article does say that the adoptive mother started to drink heavily because she was frustrated. Getting addicted to alcohol when you have a lot of frustrations is a sure recipe for disaster.

[Dude111]

Originally Posted by Wawwie

As "Kramer" from "Seinfeld" said, "apparently, adoption leads to murder."

Ya I wonder if thats why sometimes people dont tell the person they are adopted......

[GentlemanJim]

Throughout my lifetime I have had 3 close friends who were (admittedly) adopted.

All 3 were among the most well balanced people I have known.

When the "right to adopt" became a lightning-rod issue approx 30 years ago, I shared the above opinion with the then most current adoptee friend out of the three, and asked him for his thoughts as to why that was.

His response was that prospective parents were usually screened as to their aptitude, and ability to provide a wholesome, nurturing environment. I placed great stock in his feelings on the matter.

Unfortunately, we seem to have devolved into an alternate adoption mindset where children are regarded as trophies.

There is a book by that very title.

[Janice Johnson]

The WORST Adoption story I have ever heard of is.... Young man and young Woman have sex and an unplanned Pregnancy occurred. Young man and Young Woman decide they can't raise a baby at their young ages. They give baby up for Adoption. At 18, "Baby," is now a Legal Adult and searches for her Biological Parents. She finds Dad and she and Dad have sex with each other! Eew. She gets pregnant by her own Biological Father! She gives birth and he is both Father and Grandfather to her Baby! If this wasn't bad enough, Dad ended up Murdering her, their Baby who was only about a few months old, and committing Suicide. So sad.... I don't remember what happened to the Biological Mom however....

[Dude111]

Originally Posted by Wawwie

As "Kramer" from "Seinfeld" said, "apparently, adoption leads to murder."

Ya we gotta feel bad for those who end up being treated badly when adopted.......

Be nice if we could actually help them out of that situation!!