Reply here if you are not good at "small talk" - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

TVFactFan · 03-25-2015, 02:11 PM

I really struggle with small talk at work when I am around someone who I normally don't talk to and we end up in the elevator together, subway together, crossing paths down the hall, or at the copy machine.

After the weather I seriously run out of conversation. Anyone else

Mace Dolex · 03-25-2015, 02:56 PM

I would say I'm pretty shy just like anybody else, in high school especially I could never muster the courage to ask a girl on a date for that reason I never attended my H.S. prom either, my mom even took me to see a psychologist too see if I had a problem but nothing was discovered.

It wasn't until after H.S. and getting my first job at 19 working fast food that I started to interact with people, I had to pretty much since I was facing hungry customers everyday so that really helped me to come out of my shell so to speak and along the way talk to female co-workers.

Now of course at 38 people still say I'm introverted but you know what? I don't give a crap, yeah I don't have any friends, I don't go out to parties, but basically I've realized I just don't like hanging out with people I find them a nuisance sometimes. If I'm working 40 hours a week dealing with customers I want the weekends all to myself, it makes perfect sense right?

That doesn't mean I'm a hermit and that I stay home all the time, sure I go out to the mall or to the movies I just don't like being accompanied by anybody.

And now with social media and smartphones practically everybody has their nose buried in their phones that nobody talks anymore so why should I start now?

Penny Lane · 03-25-2015, 08:47 PM

I am not good at small talk unless I know a person well. i lead a very ordinary life with little or no "drama" so I really don't have anything very interesting to talk about. I am a good listener though. I know a couple of people who talk my ear off. I wonder how they can find so much to talk about!

Schmoopie · 03-25-2015, 09:46 PM

If there's something that I notice that we have in common, I might mention it but other wise I just keep quiet. Sometimes the small talk works, sometimes not.

MrCleveland · 03-25-2015, 10:44 PM

I do hate small talk...many people will bug me about if I can give them a cigarette, know when the next bus is coming, or anything.

I wish I could be like Greta Garbo's character in one of my favorite films Grand Hotel...

ponytail · 03-26-2015, 06:18 AM

I'm not good at small talk either, even my posts here are short.

Marvo301 · 03-26-2015, 02:00 PM

As an introvert I really struggle with small talk!

Janice · 03-26-2015, 04:30 PM

It depends on my mood. Some days I'll talk to the person sitting next to me in a waiting room or something like that. Other days, I don't want to give someone the time of day although I'm always polite.

Bonniegirl · 03-26-2015, 08:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janice

It depends on my mood. Some days I'll talk to the person sitting next to me in a waiting room or something like that. Other days, I don't want to give someone the time of day although I'm always polite.

Me too!! More times than not, I love small talk!

I'm outgoing and can pretty much talk to anyone.

If I'm not feeling well or really tired or something bad just happened I'm quieter , but if someone starts a conversation I politely will talk with them or just smile and nod and let them talk!

JamesG · 03-26-2015, 09:37 PM

For me it depends on my mood, where I am and who I happen to be around. Certain places like the doctor's office or on public transit I don't want to be bothered.

When I want to start small talk w/ someone I find that cigarettes can be a great ice breaker. I would offer to light a person's cigarette or give them one outside of a bar/club and it sort of flows from there.

Coffeecup · 04-04-2015, 06:18 PM

I am far better talking with total strangers than people I know. With people I know, "It"s How are you?, Where are you working? and What have you been doing for enjoyment"? I have heard those questions since kindergarden, except saying where are you working, it was how is school.
With strangers, they don;t know who I am, so I talked about how they happen to live here, things in the news, tv programs, what they like about the area. With people I know it the same 3 questions, over and over.

gidgetgrape · 04-04-2015, 11:57 PM

I think it helps if you give the other person a compliment or notice something he or she likes. Don't say you like stuff if you don't because it comes off phoney and the person might think you're trying to be funny. But, most of the time if I say, "I like your shoes" or "How long have you been a ____ fan?" the other person says "Thanks" and launches into a little story. Then all you have to do is nod and say "Really?" and maybe ask a followup question.

On a serious note - After you turn 30 (maybe even younger), if you run into someone that you haven't seen in awhile, don't ask them about their parents. They may have recently passed away or be very ill and you may hit a raw nerve. Instead say, "How's the family?" That way the person has the choice of just saying "fine" or going into greater detail. That's never happened to me, but I know someone who burst into tears after being asked about a parent.

Dude111 · 04-05-2015, 03:37 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TVFactFan

I really struggle with small talk at work when I am around someone who I normally don't talk to and we end up in the elevator together, subway together, crossing paths down the hall, or at the copy machine.

I understand buddy.....

I find myself getting less and less friendly also with how mean the world is now........ Its very sad

Dont blame ya 1 bit!!

TVFactFan · 04-05-2015, 03:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Dude111

I understand buddy.....

I find myself getting less and less friendly also with how mean the world is now........ Its very sad

Dont blame ya 1 bit!!

Are you banned from City-Data or suspended?

Dude111 · 04-05-2015, 04:37 AM

I dunno.....He blocked me 10 days and I was arguing with YAK in PMs and he wouldnt do anything. He said "I cant help you if you deserved it"

YA RIGHT.... I DESERVE BEING TREATED LIKE CRAP FOR NO REASON??

I just left,havent been back in 4 days or so...... I am under alot of stress as it is,i dont need mean people like that making it worse....

03-25-2015, 02:11 PM	#1
TVFactFan Member Forum Junkie Join Date: Aug 17, 2002 Posts: 99,043	Reply here if you are not good at "small talk" I really struggle with small talk at work when I am around someone who I normally don't talk to and we end up in the elevator together, subway together, crossing paths down the hall, or at the copy machine. After the weather I seriously run out of conversation. Anyone else

03-25-2015, 08:47 PM	#3
Penny Lane Butter Pie Forum Icon Join Date: Jul 03, 2001 Location: Beneath the blue suburban skies Posts: 51,093	I am not good at small talk unless I know a person well. i lead a very ordinary life with little or no "drama" so I really don't have anything very interesting to talk about. I am a good listener though. I know a couple of people who talk my ear off. I wonder how they can find so much to talk about!
	__________________ Vulgarity is no substitute for wit- Lady Violet Crawley

03-25-2015, 09:46 PM	#4
Schmoopie Keep Calm and Love Snoopy Forum Star Join Date: Jul 13, 2008 Location: Lynnwood, Washington Posts: 15,697	If there's something that I notice that we have in common, I might mention it but other wise I just keep quiet. Sometimes the small talk works, sometimes not.
	__________________ In memory of my wonderful husband. I love and miss you more than words can say, but I will always and forever keep you in my heart. September 23, 1961-January 14, 2019

03-25-2015, 10:44 PM	#5
MrCleveland Drew Carey from Hell Forum Star Join Date: Nov 10, 2007 Location: The City of Cleveland, in The State of Cleveland, in The United States of Cleveland Posts: 14,222	I do hate small talk...many people will bug me about if I can give them a cigarette, know when the next bus is coming, or anything. I wish I could be like Greta Garbo's character in one of my favorite films Grand Hotel...
	__________________ Thank God for kids that love Obscure Things. Lee Hazlewood (1929-2007) You ARE Special to God! Rev. Ernest Angely (August 1921-May 2021)

03-26-2015, 02:00 PM	#7
Marvo301 I'm NOT a Blockhead! Forum Celebrity Join Date: May 17, 2002 Location: The Great White North Posts: 21,453	As an introvert I really struggle with small talk!
	__________________ Only a life lived for others is worth living. Albert Einstein A life isn't worth living unless it has impact on other lives. Jackie Robinson Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better man. Benjamin Franklin

03-25-2015, 02:56 PM	#2
Mace Dolex Member Senior Member Join Date: Aug 12, 2013 Posts: 2,668	I would say I'm pretty shy just like anybody else, in high school especially I could never muster the courage to ask a girl on a date for that reason I never attended my H.S. prom either, my mom even took me to see a psychologist too see if I had a problem but nothing was discovered. It wasn't until after H.S. and getting my first job at 19 working fast food that I started to interact with people, I had to pretty much since I was facing hungry customers everyday so that really helped me to come out of my shell so to speak and along the way talk to female co-workers. Now of course at 38 people still say I'm introverted but you know what? I don't give a crap, yeah I don't have any friends, I don't go out to parties, but basically I've realized I just don't like hanging out with people I find them a nuisance sometimes. If I'm working 40 hours a week dealing with customers I want the weekends all to myself, it makes perfect sense right? That doesn't mean I'm a hermit and that I stay home all the time, sure I go out to the mall or to the movies I just don't like being accompanied by anybody. And now with social media and smartphones practically everybody has their nose buried in their phones that nobody talks anymore so why should I start now?

03-26-2015, 06:18 AM	#6
ponytail Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 20, 2004 Location: In Happy, Healthy, Wealthyville Posts: 4,273	I'm not good at small talk either, even my posts here are short.

03-26-2015, 04:30 PM	#8
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	It depends on my mood. Some days I'll talk to the person sitting next to me in a waiting room or something like that. Other days, I don't want to give someone the time of day although I'm always polite.

03-26-2015, 09:37 PM	#10
JamesG Freakshow Moderator Forum Icon Join Date: Feb 01, 2008 Location: Brooklyn, NY Posts: 57,075	For me it depends on my mood, where I am and who I happen to be around. Certain places like the doctor's office or on public transit I don't want to be bothered. When I want to start small talk w/ someone I find that cigarettes can be a great ice breaker. I would offer to light a person's cigarette or give them one outside of a bar/club and it sort of flows from there.

04-04-2015, 06:18 PM	#11
Coffeecup coffeecup. Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Jan 17, 2003 Location: snoozeville Posts: 3,181	I am far better talking with total strangers than people I know. With people I know, "It"s How are you?, Where are you working? and What have you been doing for enjoyment"? I have heard those questions since kindergarden, except saying where are you working, it was how is school. With strangers, they don;t know who I am, so I talked about how they happen to live here, things in the news, tv programs, what they like about the area. With people I know it the same 3 questions, over and over.

04-04-2015, 11:57 PM	#12
gidgetgrape Forever Gidget Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: Sep 20, 2003 Location: Texas Posts: 3,503	I think it helps if you give the other person a compliment or notice something he or she likes. Don't say you like stuff if you don't because it comes off phoney and the person might think you're trying to be funny. But, most of the time if I say, "I like your shoes" or "How long have you been a ____ fan?" the other person says "Thanks" and launches into a little story. Then all you have to do is nod and say "Really?" and maybe ask a followup question. On a serious note - After you turn 30 (maybe even younger), if you run into someone that you haven't seen in awhile, don't ask them about their parents. They may have recently passed away or be very ill and you may hit a raw nerve. Instead say, "How's the family?" That way the person has the choice of just saying "fine" or going into greater detail. That's never happened to me, but I know someone who burst into tears after being asked about a parent.

04-05-2015, 04:37 AM	#15
Dude111 Forum Legend Join Date: Nov 05, 2013 Posts: 35,985	I dunno.....He blocked me 10 days and I was arguing with YAK in PMs and he wouldnt do anything. He said "I cant help you if you deserved it" YA RIGHT.... I DESERVE BEING TREATED LIKE CRAP FOR NO REASON?? I just left,havent been back in 4 days or so...... I am under alot of stress as it is,i dont need mean people like that making it worse....