A Honeymooners New Year's Day: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 12-29-2014, 02:58 PM

(The Kramdens and Nortons are at Times Square. The ball dropped to ring in 2015.)

All (yell): "HAPPY NEW YEAR!"

(Alud Sang plays as people hug and kiss.)

Ralph (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL! HAHA!"

Alice (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR ED & TRIX."

Trixie (yells): "SAME HERE ALICE!"

Ed (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR RALPH & ALICE. YOU ARE SWEET KIDS."

Ralph (yells): "MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION IS NOT TO DRINK TOO MUCH."

(They go to the Hong Kong Gardens. Ralph is ordering more drinks.)

Alice: "Ralph, remember your resolution. I think you had enough."

Ralph: "Oh come on Alice. I know my limit. Here's some pieces of knowledge. When I was a normal sized young man, my limit was 6 cups. That is my limit today. The bigger you are, the harder it is to get drunk AND DON'T YOU DARE SAY IT ALICE."

Ed: "Ralph, I think you better stop. If you pass out, it would take 20 of us to lift you home."

Ralph (yells): "YOU'RE A RIOT NORTON!" (normally): "I can handle my liquor and I am going to have another cup of beer. This will be my 5th cup."

Alice: "It will be your sixth Ralph."

Ralph: "Okay sixth. I got two more cups to go before I get drunk."

(Everyone rolls their eyes.)

(Later on, Ralph walks outside the restaurant. Somehow, Alice & The Nortons don't know that he is drunk.)

Ralph: "The worrrrrrrrrrld is moving."

(He sees a bunch of tough bikers.)

Ralph: "Look at those tough bikers that are in my way. GET OUT OF MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY WAY BEFORE YOU GET SENT TO THE MOON."

(The bikers beat him up. The next morning, Ralph wakes up in the Kramden apartment. Alice, who got told the whole story, is right there by his bedside.)

Alice: "Good morning Ralph. I got a question. What explanation do you have for this article?"

(She shows him the article of what Ralph did last night.)

Alice: "Ralph, you should go down in the Guiness Book of World Records for breaking your New Year's Resolution the quickest. You got a BIIIIIIIG mouth."

(Ralph puts the covers over his head.)

(Jackie walks on stage. Audience applauds.)

Jackie: "Thank you. I hope that everyone has a safe and happy New Year. The Miami Beach New Year's celebrations are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Audience cheers.)

12-29-2014, 02:58 PM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,072	A Honeymooners New Year's Day: (The Kramdens and Nortons are at Times Square. The ball dropped to ring in 2015.) All (yell): "HAPPY NEW YEAR!" (Alud Sang plays as people hug and kiss.) Ralph (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL! HAHA!" Alice (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR ED & TRIX." Trixie (yells): "SAME HERE ALICE!" Ed (yells): "HAPPY NEW YEAR RALPH & ALICE. YOU ARE SWEET KIDS." Ralph (yells): "MY NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION IS NOT TO DRINK TOO MUCH." (They go to the Hong Kong Gardens. Ralph is ordering more drinks.) Alice: "Ralph, remember your resolution. I think you had enough." Ralph: "Oh come on Alice. I know my limit. Here's some pieces of knowledge. When I was a normal sized young man, my limit was 6 cups. That is my limit today. The bigger you are, the harder it is to get drunk AND DON'T YOU DARE SAY IT ALICE." Ed: "Ralph, I think you better stop. If you pass out, it would take 20 of us to lift you home." Ralph (yells): "YOU'RE A RIOT NORTON!" (normally): "I can handle my liquor and I am going to have another cup of beer. This will be my 5th cup." Alice: "It will be your sixth Ralph." Ralph: "Okay sixth. I got two more cups to go before I get drunk." (Everyone rolls their eyes.) (Later on, Ralph walks outside the restaurant. Somehow, Alice & The Nortons don't know that he is drunk.) Ralph: "The worrrrrrrrrrld is moving." (He sees a bunch of tough bikers.) Ralph: "Look at those tough bikers that are in my way. GET OUT OF MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY WAY BEFORE YOU GET SENT TO THE MOON." (The bikers beat him up. The next morning, Ralph wakes up in the Kramden apartment. Alice, who got told the whole story, is right there by his bedside.) Alice: "Good morning Ralph. I got a question. What explanation do you have for this article?" (She shows him the article of what Ralph did last night.) Alice: "Ralph, you should go down in the Guiness Book of World Records for breaking your New Year's Resolution the quickest. You got a BIIIIIIIG mouth." (Ralph puts the covers over his head.) (Jackie walks on stage. Audience applauds.) Jackie: "Thank you. I hope that everyone has a safe and happy New Year. The Miami Beach New Year's celebrations are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!" (Audience cheers.)