My father died today 3/16/14 at age 83 - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

TeeVeeCloset · 03-16-2014, 06:06 PM

Though a member here for over a decade, I am an extremely private person who does not participate in any social media, not by judgement but by choice.

I am far from the only person that has had an extremely complex parental situation, and though I have a cherished very small group of what I consider almost or closer than family friends, I feel I cannot even express or burden them with the news of what is the natural end of life that we will all eventually reach. Of course I will let them know, but my father died at 1:34PM eastern time at the age of 83 in a nursing home in my home state of New Jersey, where his only 5 year request was "Get me out of here, take me home". He suffered from demension, parkinsons and needed 24/7 round the clock care in which my mother (now out of state) and unable to walk herself could not provide proper care. Trust me as many others, the story and situation is not a simple one, but I will end it with that.

I am age 51, again not alone in a growing up baby boomer childhood environment of "which parent should I side with during every violent argument?". As I grew up and went through much self therapy you see the good and bad in both parties.

I have an extremely small beloved family, my father no surviving family or friends, so I cannot and will not burden my friends, etc with the standard service and funeral. So my father will be laid to rest in the plot I bought for him a decade ago but with no fanfare and fast, probably by Tuesday, March 18, 2014.

Yes I have cried but for a man that I hardly knew and was from a cross generation and time where we just couldn't or it seemed to me ever reach a open dialogue of communication with just one "I Love You too" said to me in my entire life, his last words to me, but by the only time the words were ever spoken he know longer knew I was his son.

So I open a thread to total absolute strangers as I have lived a life avoiding every aspect of this new world of total communication via every new technology that seems to change daily. But I am numb with a thousand other unknown and unexplored feelings that probably cut much more deeply than I care to even admit.

This is my eulogy, his biggest fear was death, not religious, from another generation, born 1930, deep down didn't know how to express happy emotion or be what a "parent" from what is written or is expected to be, but he was still my father.......I don't carry a single trait of either parent, by choice?, well yes the bad as I have asked in jest to myself sometimes thinking "I must have been adopted...lol"

I just needed to write, I don't expect anything or anyone to express sympathies, but yet felt compelled to write something here as I have about television topics for again over a decade.

My father.....September 25, 1930-March 16, 2014

from your son

Dude111 · 05-09-2014, 01:03 AM

Ahhhhhhhhh I am so sorry buddy....

Sounded like your dad had a hard time and it was hard on the rest of you...I am so sorry for your loss

tlc38tlc38 · 05-09-2014, 09:12 AM

I will keep you and yours in my prayers and thoughts. Things will get better, just hang in there.

Bonniegirl · 07-13-2014, 05:22 PM

I am sorry about your dad passing. My prayers to you . I'm just responding now because I am a new member as of a couple days ago. My dear mother passed away on January 24th of this year. She was also 83!

OH Nuts! · 07-13-2014, 07:18 PM

TeeVeeCloset sorry to hear about your dad's passing. My thoughts and deepest condolences are with you.

Dude111 · 07-14-2014, 01:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bonniegirl62

My dear mother passed away on January 24th of this year. She was also 83!

Im so sorry

Welcome to the site..

03-16-2014, 06:06 PM	#1
TeeVeeCloset Member Senior Member Join Date: Aug 25, 2003 Posts: 1,873	My father died today 3/16/14 at age 83 Though a member here for over a decade, I am an extremely private person who does not participate in any social media, not by judgement but by choice. I am far from the only person that has had an extremely complex parental situation, and though I have a cherished very small group of what I consider almost or closer than family friends, I feel I cannot even express or burden them with the news of what is the natural end of life that we will all eventually reach. Of course I will let them know, but my father died at 1:34PM eastern time at the age of 83 in a nursing home in my home state of New Jersey, where his only 5 year request was "Get me out of here, take me home". He suffered from demension, parkinsons and needed 24/7 round the clock care in which my mother (now out of state) and unable to walk herself could not provide proper care. Trust me as many others, the story and situation is not a simple one, but I will end it with that. I am age 51, again not alone in a growing up baby boomer childhood environment of "which parent should I side with during every violent argument?". As I grew up and went through much self therapy you see the good and bad in both parties. I have an extremely small beloved family, my father no surviving family or friends, so I cannot and will not burden my friends, etc with the standard service and funeral. So my father will be laid to rest in the plot I bought for him a decade ago but with no fanfare and fast, probably by Tuesday, March 18, 2014. Yes I have cried but for a man that I hardly knew and was from a cross generation and time where we just couldn't or it seemed to me ever reach a open dialogue of communication with just one "I Love You too" said to me in my entire life, his last words to me, but by the only time the words were ever spoken he know longer knew I was his son. So I open a thread to total absolute strangers as I have lived a life avoiding every aspect of this new world of total communication via every new technology that seems to change daily. But I am numb with a thousand other unknown and unexplored feelings that probably cut much more deeply than I care to even admit. This is my eulogy, his biggest fear was death, not religious, from another generation, born 1930, deep down didn't know how to express happy emotion or be what a "parent" from what is written or is expected to be, but he was still my father.......I don't carry a single trait of either parent, by choice?, well yes the bad as I have asked in jest to myself sometimes thinking "I must have been adopted...lol" I just needed to write, I don't expect anything or anyone to express sympathies, but yet felt compelled to write something here as I have about television topics for again over a decade. My father.....September 25, 1930-March 16, 2014 from your son
	__________________ Living near "Ozzie Nelson Drive"..... Last edited by TeeVeeCloset; 03-16-2014 at 06:18 PM. Reason: mistake

05-09-2014, 09:12 AM	#3
tlc38tlc38 Every day’s a Dolly day! Forum Star Join Date: May 02, 2008 Location: I’m just travelin’ thru Posts: 19,271	I will keep you and yours in my prayers and thoughts. Things will get better, just hang in there.
	__________________ Give generously to them and do so without a grudging heart; then because of this the LORD your God will bless you in all your work and in everything you put your hand to. Deuteronomy 15:10 In loving memory of my best friend, my Mama.

05-09-2014, 01:03 AM	#2
Dude111 Forum Legend Join Date: Nov 05, 2013 Posts: 36,768	Ahhhhhhhhh I am so sorry buddy.... Sounded like your dad had a hard time and it was hard on the rest of you...I am so sorry for your loss

07-13-2014, 05:22 PM	#4
Bonniegirl AKA Hazel Horvath Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 10, 2014 Posts: 65,952	I am sorry about your dad passing. My prayers to you . I'm just responding now because I am a new member as of a couple days ago. My dear mother passed away on January 24th of this year. She was also 83!

07-13-2014, 07:18 PM	#5
OH Nuts! Member Forum King Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 133,383	TeeVeeCloset sorry to hear about your dad's passing. My thoughts and deepest condolences are with you.