A Honeymooners Valentine's Day:

[Frank Gannucci]

(Ralph is home with a bunch of roses.)

(Ed comes down. Audience applauds.)

Ed: "Whaddaya say Ralph?"

Ralph: "Hello Norton. Look at all the roses I am going to give Alice tonight."

Ed: "Oh yeah. I see you chipped in a pretty big enough of money. You got some many roses here Ralph that you should turn this house into a green house. Ha ha ha."

Ralph: "Not only that, but we are going out to the Kit Kat Club. The same place where we spent our wedding night and the band there played our song. 'Yes, We Have No Bananas.'"

Ed: "I gave Trixie some roses but unfortuantely something happend to them."

Ralph: "What happened?"

Ed: "They got washed out when the tide came."

Ralph: "You stupe. You took the ROSES down the sewer?"

Ed: "I had to Ralph. I wanted to make sure I got the roses before someone lese got them."

Ralph: "Oh, you are a mental case."

Ed: "Maybe I can order flowers from 1-800 Flowers. My brother says he can do it. The only thing is when it says: 'To start press any key.' He says: 'Where's the ANY key? I see Pig Up (Page Up), Ca-tarl (Ctrl) but no any key.'"

Ralph: "Your brother must be jsut like you."

Ed: "He is. He is."

(Alice comes down. Audience applauds.)

Alice: "Hello Ralph. Hello Ed...Ralph, what beautiful roses. Happy Valentine's Day to you two."

(Alice kisses Ralph.)

Ed: "Happy St. Valentine's Day Alice."

(Trixie comes down. Audience applauds.)

Trixie: "Hello Ed. Happy Valentine's Day."

(Trixie kisses Ed.)

Ed: "Your gift will come Trixie. I know what gift I am going to give you."

Trixie: "What?"

Ed: "A new broom."

Trixie (sarcastically): "Thanks Ed."

Ed: "Hey, how about we go to David Busters to celebrate. We are all kids at heart."

Ralph: "Ooooh, I know you are Norton. Folks, this is the most romantic day of the year. Let's all celebrate."

Trixie: "Oh Ed. Your gift is upstairs. It is a Mickey Mouse hat."

Ed: "Thank you Trix. You are a wonderful woman."

(Ed kisses Trix.)

Alice: "Ralph, I got you a gift for you. Rabbit lined gloves for the bus."

Ralph: "Thank you Alice. You will love the fact that we are both going to the Kit Kat Club to celebrate our Valentine's Day because that is where we had our wedding night."

Alice: "Oh Ralph."

(They hug and kiss.)

Ralph: "This is the most romantic day of the year."

(They all sing a song abotu Valentine's Day.)

(Jackie Gleason walks on stage. Audience applauds.)

Jackie: "Thank you. Happy Valentine's Day."

(Audience cheers.)

Jackie: "Folks, the Miami Beach audiences are the BEST! GOOD NIGHT!"

(Audience cheers.)