A Honeymooners New Year's Eve:

[Frank Gannucci]

(The Kramdens and Nortons are boarding a New York subway.)

Ed: "What a way to celebrate the New Year. By being in Times Square."

Ralph: "Only Miami Beach beats New York when it comes to celebrating the New Year."

(Audience cheers.)

Alice: "Ralph, I for one hope, you don't get buzzed and cause trouble."

Trixie: "Yeah."

Ralph: "I never get drunk."

Alice: "Oh no? How about the time you came in from a Raccoon meeting, put your head out the window and yelled: 'Hey Mrs. Gallagher, what is your cat doing in my apartment.' Only thing is that it wasn't her cat. You had yoru Raccoon hat on backwards."

(Ed laughs.)

Ralph (yells): "SHUT UP NORTON!"

(They arrive in Times Square. It is past 4p and all of them are squished like sardines.)

Trixie: "I have never been squised like this before."

Ralph: "Me neither."

Ed: "Ralph, if you left here, there would be three more people to take your place in Times Square."

Ralph (yells): "OOOOOH, YOU ARE GOING TO GET IT NORTON. OH, YOU ARE GOING TO GET IT."

Ed: "Too bad that the Raccoons couldn't be here tonight. Imagine all the fun we would have being on TV with Ryan Seacrest. Maybe he has the Kardashian sisters with him. He produces their shows. Those Kardashian sisters. Va-va-va-voom."

Ralph: "You said it Norton."

(Ralph & Ed are next to the barrier. They get interviewed by Al Roker.)

Al: "What is your name sir?"

Ralph: "I am Ralph Kramden. I brive a dus."

Al: "You brive a dus?"

Ralph: "A dus I brive."

Ed: "That is just his way of remaining calm and cool. My name is Ed Norton. I have the greatest job ever."

Al: "Waht is that?"

Ed: "I work in the sewer."

(Al looks like he is going to throw up.)

Al: "Thank you for telling me that. The ball is coming down."

Everyone (yells): "10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1..."

(To be continued.)