Intelligent things Frank Burns said.

[Yong Fang]

The episode where Hawkeye was sleepwalking and playing basketball. Then had night terrors about his friends back home in Maine. Hawkeye then refused to go to sleep and was up one late night in the Swamp and in desperation for company woke up Frank to talk. Frank was rightfully annoyed at this. Hawkeye asked frank if he was ever afraid of the dark.

Frank told a story about how his father (who had the same personality as Frank) took his Popeye nightlight away. Frank's father told Frank (and I am paraphrasing).....

"There is nothing in the darkness that is not there in the light."

I thought that was the smartest thing that Frank ever said. That there is no reason to fear the dark more than the light.

The other example was when Potter went to Tokyo for six days and left frank in charge. Frank as CO disallowed gambling. Sgt. Zale told Frank by accident that he lost $300 bucks which made Frank think there was a thief in camp and had Radar follow him to all the tents seaching for the missing money.

They go to Father McCauhey's (sic, sorry) tent to look around and opened a small drawer that had various clerical collars. Radar went something like "Gee, I thought he only had the one...." where Frank responded (paraphrasing) "the only one, what do you think he did when it got dirty?"

Those are the two that I know of. I also loved it when Frank would tell Hawkeye to "can the Bugle Oil." That's classic.

Any others?

[bookandfilmnut]

Originally Posted by Yong Fang

The episode where Hawkeye was sleepwalking and playing basketball. Then had night terrors about his friends back home in Maine. Hawkeye then refused to go to sleep and was up one late night in the Swamp and in desperation for company woke up Frank to talk. Frank was rightfully annoyed at this. Hawkeye asked frank if he was ever afraid of the dark.

Frank told a story about how his father (who had the same personality as Frank) took his Popeye nightlight away. Frank's father told Frank (and I am paraphrasing).....

"There is nothing in the darkness that is not there in the light."

I thought that was the smartest thing that Frank ever said. That there is no reason to fear the dark more than the light.

The other example was when Potter went to Tokyo for six days and left frank in charge. Frank as CO disallowed gambling. Sgt. Zale told Frank by accident that he lost $300 bucks which made Frank think there was a thief in camp and had Radar follow him to all the tents seaching for the missing money.

They go to Father McCauhey's (sic, sorry) tent to look around and opened a small drawer that had various clerical collars. Radar went something like "Gee, I thought he only had the one...." where Frank responded (paraphrasing) "the only one, what do you think he did when it got dirty?"

Those are the two that I know of. I also loved it when Frank would tell Hawkeye to "can the Bugle Oil." That's classic.

Any others?

Yes, I love that line of Frank's in Mulcahy's tent, the entire line was "Of course he more than one. What did you think he did when it got dirty or wore out? Convert?" Funniest Frank line ever.

[treky]

this doesn't really have anything to do with that, but I like the scene at the end of the episode where Margret gets engaged and Frank's in the swamp with Hawkeye & B.J. when Margret comes in for something and Frank asks Hawkeye if he wants to go to Rosies bar. He says there's a red-headed lt. down there whos had her eye on him and "tonight she may just get her chance!" Margret says "She's a little young for you Major, don't you think so?" Frank says "Oh I don't know; a little youth might be good for a change!"

[Best Man]

"Ali Baba right to the end"--referring to Hawkeye in the 4th season ep where Hawk was court martialed