Surviving Suicide

[monkeefan]

One episode of Growing Pains, titled Reason to Live (original airdate: December 8, 1987) dealt with the sensitive topic of Teen Suicide.

As a person who actually attempted suicide 8 years ago, at age 19, let me first mention that its NOTHING to joke about, and that if you or someone close to you is planning to take your own life, PLEASE remember that Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

There are SEVERAL reasons why someone would want to kill themselves.

One person might feel so angry at the world around him, and everything going wrong in his life, that he feels taking his own life is his only option, like Andrew Koenig felt.

See, Andrew Koenig, who as we all know took his own life 2 years ago, was last seen alive on Valentines Day, 2010; a week later, on February 22, his parents, Walter and Judy, reported him Missing; 3 days later, on February 25, 2010, Walter made a sad announcement, with Judy standing by his side, that he thought he NEVER would make as a parent: My son took his own life.

My personal story behind my attempted suicide began 9 years ago this week. It was weeks prior to graduating high school, and I learned through the annual yearbook, with ZERO prior knowledge, that my then-crush was seeing (AND premaritally ****ing) someone else, who shes since married.

As if THAT wasnt horrific enough, my mom, a College professor, was rushed to the local hospital in my hometown, only to be transferred an hour away, 24 hours later, where the residing physician determined her left leg below the knee was damaged beyond repair--and forced to amputate it.

The following May, I too was Hospitalized--in my case for Psychiatric reasons in connection with the Double Whammy, but not even THAT did me any good, because my Suicide attempt occurred 6 weeks later, 24 hours after a civil court case involving me and my then-crush.

I attempted Suicide by Hanging my right foot onto telephone wires, in case you wanna know HOW I tried Suicide; though I escaped physically unharmed, I remember that night, after the attempt, asking myself, if there IS a God, WHY are all these terrible things happening to me and my family?

3 days later, 8 months after my initial referral by my then-psychologist to the local Mental Health agency, I began my voluntary enrollment at the agency-owned Day Treatment program, a day-long group therapy session for those with Mental Health conditions a la Schizophrenia, Bipolar Disorder, Clinical Depression, and in my case, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

I had been diagnosed with the OCD at age 17, the Summer before my Senior Year of High School began, and had been diagnosed earlier, at age 3, with severe Autism, a serious Brain Disease affecting 1 in 88 kids in the U.S.

I was also severely abused at age 11, when my then-current female teacher thought it would be a great idea to have a group of boys in my class take turns each day holding my privates for me as I tried urinating, a form of abuse I learned in my adult life was called Physical Restraintment, which I firmly believe should NEVER be legal to begin with.

As if THAT wasnt enough, my 7th-grade teacher ALWAYS got me into trouble EVERY day--9 out of 10 times for NO REASON at all.

In 2006, after enrolling in college initially as an escapism from the YEARS of abuse I suffered (not by my parents or any other relatives of mine, but by those around me), I met this young lady who helped me change my life totally for the better, just by being there for me as I needed her to be.

Though I will admit an initial error in judgment on my part could have ended things unhappily between us, in the end, she forgave me, and in the process, I too was able to forgive myself for all that had gone wrong since age 11.

My point in sharing all this with you is that you CAN overcome obstacles against you, even when times get rough, and there IS a light at the end of the tunnel, but Suicide is essentially taking the Easy Way out.

Though I no longer condone Suicide, as a Survivor of Attempted Suicide, I understand, as a human being, WHY someone would go as far as committing such a terrible (though not unpardonable) sin.

I hope and I pray that this story is worth every minute of your time, and I thank you all very much in advance for reading it.

[Schmoopie]

I'm sorry you had to go through all of that. I can't say I know where you're coming from but my dad committed suicide back in 1992. So I really feel for people who either contemplate it or lose someone through it.