GUY ADVICE!!! 911! lol. - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-13-2011, 12:34 AM

ok.. literally have not been here in forever, but i need serious guy advice, STAT. i literally am going crazy.... heres basically the gist of it. if anyone needs anymore questions, just ask!

ok, long story short, i have a new department assistant manager whom ive fallen for hard. hes been there about 3 months now, and i was pretty much crushing on him by day 2. he was kinda quiet, but i tend to 'harass' people and get them to open up. so, after a couple weeks i told him that he pretty much had no personality lol. well, since then hes def. opened up with me, and we talk a lot more. hes def. kinda shy with everyone else, but im assuming bc i really put myself out there, hes relaxed a bit around me. we are FB friends and sometimes talk for hours..he told me all about his kid, divorce, [hes 32, im 27], and pretty much told me everything without me pushing. a lot of people at work [even my boss] have said that they think he likes me and that there is 'something there'. whatever that means, haha. well, cut to 3 weeks ago, i was feeling pretty good from all the confidence people gave me, that i decided to ask him out on a group outing. i sent him a fb message saying that me and a friend would be out in town and if hed like to meet us for a drink, we would be around. he replied later thanking me, but declining stating that as a rule he doesnt hangout with workers that work for him. so, i replied saying basically ya whatever haha and then i said that he probably heard things around work that i might like him and that i wont deny those allegations. hes known before that i like him, because apparently im not the best at hiding my true feelings, plus its a pretty big store and people talk all the time. he didnt respond, so i assumed that maybe he didnt get it. so, a couple days later i wrote it again, saying that i really like him, and that it hasnt had any change on me at work and it will never be an issue. i also said that i know its not reciprocated, but would appreciate feedback so i dont sound like a complete fool. again, he never acknowledged it. so, after that i dropped it because i know that he had to have read it. i wouldve appreciated a 'thanks, but not interested' or 'its not appropriate' over nothing at all, because now i am SO confused. well, last week he randomly asked me if i had ever been to lemon grass. i didnt hear completely so i asked him again and he repeated it again, and was like.. in moultonborough. so then i was like OH! in center harbor! no! ive always wanted to go tho.. it looks so nice from the outside! you? he said no, but his friends just went and said the drinks were really good and strong, and that the food was good too. i pretty much just replied with an 'ok'. normally, i wouldve responded with a witty 'oh when we going?!', but i had already felt rejected after i invited him out on a group outing. its been over a week and i still cant figure out why he asked me that. the restaurant is about 45 min south from me, in a direction i dont normally go to, except for when i head south to catch the highway. lemon grass a bit closer to him, as its more in his area. he lives a little bit over an hour from work and about an hour from my town. i just thought it was weird, since hes from a different area and id expect if he asked about a particular restaurant in my town or where i work, but it was in another town, way in the opposite direction, more or less 'his' neighborhood. my friend [whom i work with] and boss think he likes me, but that hes hard to figure out where he is so quiet. hmm??? it is against policy to date your direct supervisor, but in those circumstances, they would accommodate. any input would be greatly appreciated!!! thank you!!!

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-13-2011, 04:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hollywood Rock Chic

Does he have a girlfriend? Sounds to me, that he is in a relationship with someone; but he also enjoys chatting with you (via, Facebook, etc.). Another factor, he probably feels uncomfortable dating someone, whom he is working with, but is too shy to be honest with you. Also, maybe he does like you, but since you are more assertive, outgoing, etc. He is intimidated!!! I would just wait and see what happens; you already told him how you feel, now the ball is in his court.

no, he is single!! hes recently separated, after 7 years of marriage and divorced.

he is def. shy and socially awkward for sure! lol. he knows that i like him, as he can probably tell, and if that didnt give it away, im sure me telling him helped confirm it!

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-13-2011, 04:37 AM

i just dont know why he would ask me something like that, knowing that i like him. and to a place thats not anywhere near me, or in a direction i rarely go in! are men that stupid?!

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-13-2011, 11:21 PM

BUMP THIS HELLO 911

robyrob · 10-14-2011, 08:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ¤I Love Clay Aiken¤

i just dont know why he would ask me something like that, knowing that i like him. and to a place thats not anywhere near me, or in a direction i rarely go in! are men that stupid?!

YES. guys are that stupid; we typically are completely confused by the way women think, and are totally in the dark as to what the heck women are trying to do or say.

It sounds to me like this guy just wants to be friends and keep his job.

If he recently just got out of a long term marriage he probably doesn't want to (and really shouldn't) get into a relationship for awhile, and certainly not before he feels ready to do so. Definitely not at the risk of a fairly new job.

Don't push him, if something happens, it will happen; for now assume that he just needs a friend.

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-15-2011, 12:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by robyrob

YES. guys are that stupid; we typically are completely confused by the way women think, and are totally in the dark as to what the heck women are trying to do or say.

It sounds to me like this guy just wants to be friends and keep his job.

If he recently just got out of a long term marriage he probably doesn't want to (and really shouldn't) get into a relationship for awhile, and certainly not before he feels ready to do so. Definitely not at the risk of a fairly new job.

Don't push him, if something happens, it will happen; for now assume that he just needs a friend.

Thanks!! well, he wouldnt lose his job, if anything i would have to go to another department which is no big deal. but yes, i do agree men are that dumb! lol. i also find that when some other guy coworkers are around, they 'gang' up on me and its very middle school teasing, except its not cute. least not for me! its annoying.

MrCleveland · 10-15-2011, 08:49 AM

^I Love Clay Aiken...

I can relate, but right now I'm trying to find Ms. Right. It's been 5 years since I was with a woman and at this point, I feel that I may be single 'till I'm dead!

But the worst part of it is...the rest of my family has a relationship with the opposite sex and I feel sooooo left out!

¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ · 10-18-2011, 11:15 PM

thanks!! i think im just gonna ask him on thursday! i cant deal without knowing, and the mixed weird signals i get from him... cant take it!

10-13-2011, 12:34 AM	#1
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	GUY ADVICE!!! 911! lol. ok.. literally have not been here in forever, but i need serious guy advice, STAT. i literally am going crazy.... heres basically the gist of it. if anyone needs anymore questions, just ask! ok, long story short, i have a new department assistant manager whom ive fallen for hard. hes been there about 3 months now, and i was pretty much crushing on him by day 2. he was kinda quiet, but i tend to 'harass' people and get them to open up. so, after a couple weeks i told him that he pretty much had no personality lol. well, since then hes def. opened up with me, and we talk a lot more. hes def. kinda shy with everyone else, but im assuming bc i really put myself out there, hes relaxed a bit around me. we are FB friends and sometimes talk for hours..he told me all about his kid, divorce, [hes 32, im 27], and pretty much told me everything without me pushing. a lot of people at work [even my boss] have said that they think he likes me and that there is 'something there'. whatever that means, haha. well, cut to 3 weeks ago, i was feeling pretty good from all the confidence people gave me, that i decided to ask him out on a group outing. i sent him a fb message saying that me and a friend would be out in town and if hed like to meet us for a drink, we would be around. he replied later thanking me, but declining stating that as a rule he doesnt hangout with workers that work for him. so, i replied saying basically ya whatever haha and then i said that he probably heard things around work that i might like him and that i wont deny those allegations. hes known before that i like him, because apparently im not the best at hiding my true feelings, plus its a pretty big store and people talk all the time. he didnt respond, so i assumed that maybe he didnt get it. so, a couple days later i wrote it again, saying that i really like him, and that it hasnt had any change on me at work and it will never be an issue. i also said that i know its not reciprocated, but would appreciate feedback so i dont sound like a complete fool. again, he never acknowledged it. so, after that i dropped it because i know that he had to have read it. i wouldve appreciated a 'thanks, but not interested' or 'its not appropriate' over nothing at all, because now i am SO confused. well, last week he randomly asked me if i had ever been to lemon grass. i didnt hear completely so i asked him again and he repeated it again, and was like.. in moultonborough. so then i was like OH! in center harbor! no! ive always wanted to go tho.. it looks so nice from the outside! you? he said no, but his friends just went and said the drinks were really good and strong, and that the food was good too. i pretty much just replied with an 'ok'. normally, i wouldve responded with a witty 'oh when we going?!', but i had already felt rejected after i invited him out on a group outing. its been over a week and i still cant figure out why he asked me that. the restaurant is about 45 min south from me, in a direction i dont normally go to, except for when i head south to catch the highway. lemon grass a bit closer to him, as its more in his area. he lives a little bit over an hour from work and about an hour from my town. i just thought it was weird, since hes from a different area and id expect if he asked about a particular restaurant in my town or where i work, but it was in another town, way in the opposite direction, more or less 'his' neighborhood. my friend [whom i work with] and boss think he likes me, but that hes hard to figure out where he is so quiet. hmm??? it is against policy to date your direct supervisor, but in those circumstances, they would accommodate. any input would be greatly appreciated!!! thank you!!!
	__________________ DAVID COOK FOR AMERICAN IDOL

10-15-2011, 08:49 AM	#7
MrCleveland Drew Carey from Hell Forum Star Join Date: Nov 10, 2007 Location: The City of Cleveland, in The State of Cleveland, in The United States of Cleveland Posts: 14,223	^I Love Clay Aiken... I can relate, but right now I'm trying to find Ms. Right. It's been 5 years since I was with a woman and at this point, I feel that I may be single 'till I'm dead! But the worst part of it is...the rest of my family has a relationship with the opposite sex and I feel sooooo left out!
	__________________ Thank God for kids that love Obscure Things. Lee Hazlewood (1929-2007) You ARE Special to God! Rev. Ernest Angely (August 1921-May 2021)

10-13-2011, 04:37 AM	#3
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	i just dont know why he would ask me something like that, knowing that i like him. and to a place thats not anywhere near me, or in a direction i rarely go in! are men that stupid?!

10-13-2011, 11:21 PM	#4
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	BUMP THIS HELLO 911

10-18-2011, 11:15 PM	#8
¤I Love Clay Aiken¤ MISS APRIL Forum Addict Join Date: Jul 19, 2001 Location: Parsonsfield ME Shaws - Screwing my way up the employment ladder! Posts: 68,780	thanks!! i think im just gonna ask him on thursday! i cant deal without knowing, and the mixed weird signals i get from him... cant take it!