A 10 minute episode!!

[ph1l]

It actually ran slightly under 10 minutes. And to pick on "Pass the Vegetables, Please" is very close to sacrilege.
Scenes cut include:
The opening titles!!!
Gilligan showing the seeds to Mr and Mrs Howell.
Mary Ann finding her favourite seeds and the rabbit joke.
Gilligan and the Skipper with the plow.
Gilligan making use of the sand left over.
Mary Ann picking her favourite.
The Skipper and Mary Ann exercising at the lagoon.
The signal fire for the "imaginary" boat sequence.
Mary Ann reading a book half a mile away.
The Skipper getting revenge on Gilligan with the watering can.
Gilligan displaying his strength.

Just to get an idea of the butchering, here's the script with missing parts in red.

Opening Credits.

Scene: The lagoon.
The Skipper is walking with a fishing pole as he approaches the water. Gilligan is seen seated on a rock holding a fishing pole with his line cast into the lagoon.

SKIPPER: How they biting little buddy?
GILLIGAN: They're not even gumming.

The Skipper casts his line into the lagoon and is fishing alongside Gilligan. Both appear to have caught something.

GILLIGAN: Skipper, I got a bite. A real big one Skipper.
SKIPPER: So do I. Mine must weigh fifty pounds.

The Skipper and Gilligan get their fishing lines entangled.

SKIPPER: Watch it little buddy you're fouling my line. Gilligan you're fouling my line, now get it loose. Watch my line little buddy, your getting it all fouled up. Gilligan you're fouling my line now get it loose. Get it loose.

Trying to get their lines untangled the Skipper puts his foot in a bucket.

SKIPPER: Gilligan! Aahhhh!

The Skipper falls back and drops his fishing pole, which starts to go into the lagoon.

SKIPPER: Hurry Gilligan get my line. Get my foot out of this bucket. Pull it off. Hurry!

Gilligan pulls the bucket off the Skipper's foot and the Skipper loses his shoe.

SKIPPER: Whose side are you on, the fishes?

The Skipper, having had enough, leaves.

SKIPPER: Now catch dinner yourself. Gilligan will you hand me that shoe?

Gilligan tosses the Skipper the bucket with the shoe still in it. The Skipper frustratingly removes his shoe and throws the bucket down and walks off. Gilligan is left all alone to bring the catch to shore. Gilligan continues to tug and pull revealing he has caught a small wooden crate with seaweed covering the top.

GILLIGAN: If that's a fish it must come packed in cans.

After hauling the crate ashore, Gilligan removes the top cover, putting it aside. Gilligan looks inside.

GILLIGAN: Oh boy. Packages of seeds. Beets, carrots, spinach. Vegetables? Skipper, Professor look what I caught. Carrots and beets and spinach, vegetables.

The cover laying on the ground has writing on it that says “DANGER EXPERIMENTAL RADIO ACTIVE SEEDS”
Fade out

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Scene: The lagoon.
Gilligan, the Skipper and the Professor are near the crate examining the contents.

SKIPPER: Oh Professor, look at this. We've got cauliflower, we’ve got carrots...
PROFESSOR: Uh-huh green peas, artichokes.
SKIPPER: Yes, and look at this, Idaho potatoes. It's been so long since I've tasted an Idaho potato, I won't know what it tastes like.
GILLIGAN: Are we gonna grow Idaho potatoes?
SKIPPER: That's right little buddy, we're going to grow Idaho Potatoes, right here.
GILLIGAN: They're sure gonna have to have long roots.
PROFESSOR: Gilligan, catching this box of seeds is the best thing that you've done since we were marooned.
SKIPPER: Exactly little buddy, if you were a girl I'd kiss you.
GILLIGAN: Lucky me I'm a boy.
PROFESSOR: With these seeds, we'll have enough vegetables for as long as we're forced to stay here.
SKIPPER: Oh and don't forget, Mary Ann was raised on a farm so She's going to be a big help.
GILLIGAN: Hey...Hey Professor? What's a Truffle?
PROFESSOR: Why it's a subterranean fungus with solid tuber like bodies. It's known for it's pungent qualities. It's most delectable.
GILLIGAN: Yeah, but can you eat it?
PROFESSOR: Why it's a gourmet's delight.
GILLIGAN: Yeah, but can you eat it?
PROFESSOR: That's what I've been trying to tell you Gilligan, it's delicious.
GILLIGAN: Oh you finally said a word I understood.
SKIPPER: Boy, wait till the others hear about this.

Scene: Mr. and Mrs. Howells hut.
Mr. and Mrs. Howell has the opened crate in front of them and they're examining the different seed packets.

MR. HOWELL: ...a veritable gold mine of goodies. Lovey look, your favourite, little, little sugar beets.
MRS. HOWELL: Oh Thurston it's impossible.
GILLIGAN: No it says so right there on the package.
MRS. HOWELL: But sugar beets come in cans.
GILLIGAN: No, no first you have to plant them in the ground.
MRS. HOWELL: Oh please don't be silly. I've seen them in their natural habitat. A super market.
MR. HOWELL: Not shopping you understand, just sight seeing.
MRS. HOWELL: Actually I was showing some visiting royalty a poverty pocket.
GILLIGAN: Mrs. Howell, sugar beets have to come out of the ground before you can put them in cans.
MRS. HOWELL: Ew. What a perfectly ghastly idea.
GILLIGAN: You'll see when we plant then all in the ground.
MR. HOWELL: I hope you're using the editorial, we.
MRS. HOWELL: Thurston means you can't expect a Howell to dig in the ground.
GILLIGAN: But you have to dig before you plant.
MR. HOWELL: If you mention manual labour once more, I'm going to order you off the property.
MRS. HOWELL: Now you see Gilligan your silly notions have upset Mr. Howell.
GILLIGAN: Mrs. Howell if you really want sugar beets...
MRS. HOWELL: Well I do, I do. I just adore them.
GILLIGAN: Well we all have to pitch in then.
MRS. HOWELL: Oh well I intend to do my part I assure you.
GILLIGAN: Good. Dig, plant, water, fertilise or pick? Which would you rather do?
MRS. HOWELL: Eat.

Gilligan picks up the crate of seeds and walks out.
Scene: The Clearing.
Mary Ann is examining the seed packets in the crate.

MARY ANN: Beets...squash...lettuce...
GILLIGAN: My favourite is spinach.
MARY ANN: Huh, my favourite doesn't seem to be here. Well, spinach...cucumbers. Truffles?
GILLIGAN: Don't you know what a truffle is?
MARY ANN: No. We never grew any in Kansas.
GILLIGAN: A truffle is a subterranean tube that runs into a fungus. That runs into a fungus?
MARY ANN: What?.
GILLIGAN: I wish the Professor would learn to speak English.
MARY ANN: Radishes, swiss, ...carrots!
GILLIGAN: You like carrots?
MARY ANN: Oh like them, I love them. Oh Gilligan they're awfully good for you. Well the more you eat the better your eyesight.
GILLIGAN: Everybody knows that carrots are good for your eyes. MARY ANN: Why certainly.
GILLIGAN: After all, did you ever see a rabbit wearing glasses?

Scene: The garden patch
Gilligan is pulling a plow wearing a harness and a bone in his mouth as a bit. The Skipper is at the reins.

SKIPPER: Whoa Gilligan. Whoa Gilligan! Gilligan your supposed to turn a little to the left.
GILLIGAN: Skipper, I've never been a horse before.
SKIPPER: Well how much do you need to know to be a horse? We'll go over it again. Now, when I pull a little, you turn a little. When I pull a lot, you turn a lot. When I pull on both of them you're supposed to stop.

The Skipper pulls too hard and Gilligan is pulled backwards into the Skipper.

SKIPPER: You got it?
GILLIGAN: Got it.
SKIPPER: All right let's try it again.
GILLIGAN: Isn't it time for lunch?
SKIPPER: Gilligan, horses don't eat lunch. Now lets get going.

The Skipper makes the clicking noise that gets horses to move.

SKIPPER: Gk, gk, gk, gk.
GILLIGAN: Huh?
SKIPPER: What do you do when I say Gk, gk, gk, gk?

Gilligan whinnies like a horse

Scene: The garden patch.
Mary Ann is examining the soil of the garden with the Professor watching.

MARY ANN: Good soil but it's much to heavy for new plants.
PROFESSOR: Yes, the water won't drain well enough to keep the seeds moist.
GILLIGAN: You better think of something quick. The Skipper’s sitting at the table with a napkin tucked under his chin.
PROFESSOR: Well he's going to sit there for quite awhile because with this type of soil, it'll take even longer for the vegetables to come up.
MARY ANN: I think my father use to use sand or something to help the drainage.
PROFESSOR: That's a good idea. Plenty of sand at the lagoon.

Mary Ann and the Professor look at Gilligan.

MARY ANN: Gilligan?
GILLIGAN: Ah look, I did all the weeding, and the planting, and the watering and everything.
PROFESSOR: An excellent job at that.
MARY ANN: Oh and we do need the sand.
GILLIGAN: Ok, but I bet your father didn't grow anything on his farm of his.
MARY ANN: He did too.
GILLIGAN: How could he, I wasn't there to do all the work.

Scene: The lagoon.
Gilligan is getting sand for the garden. He's using the lid of the crate to scrape sand into a bucket. The warning sign is still quite visible on the lid.
Scene: The garden patch.
Gilligan is working away. The Skipper approaches to check on the gardens progress.

SKIPPER: Gilligan, are you almost finished?
GILLIGAN: Almost.

The Skipper sees what Gilligan is working on.

SKIPPER: A sand castle?
GILLIGAN: I had some extra sand.
SKIPPER: Looks like I'm wasting my time trying to mould your character.
GILLIGAN: Is that what you're trying to do?
SKIPPER: Why certainly Gilligan. Why do you suppose I have you chop the wood, bring up water, pick up coconuts and work on the farm? I'm trying to strengthen your character. I'm trying to make you officer material.
GILLIGAN: Me an officer? That's impossible.
SKIPPER: Why?
GILLIGAN: I'm too busy being the whole crew.
SKIPPER: Spread the sand Gilligan. You just don't underst...

Gilligan throws sand all over the Skipper.

SKIPPER: Over there!

Scene: The garden patch.
The plants in the garden are growing at a fantastic rate. Gilligan is holding a watering can, made from bamboo, and is watering the rows of plants. He turns around to see that the vegetables have grown to almost full size.

GILLIGAN: Hey Skipper, Professor, Mary Ann.
PROFESSOR: What's the matter.
GILLIGAN: The spinach is growing.
PROFESSOR: Oh that's impossible.
GILLIGAN: It is? Look.
PROFESSOR: Well we only planted it three days ago.
MARY ANN: Gilligan what's the matter?
GILLIGAN: The Spinach is growing.
MARY ANN: Well it can't be. It takes it... Professor?
PROFESSOR: They look like Spinach plants.
MARY ANN: Well the carrots are they coming up too?
GILLIGAN: Are they? Look.
MARY ANN: Oh, oh, the carrots aren’t they beautiful?
SKIPPER: Is...is something wrong little buddy?
GILLIGAN: Nothing’s wrong, everything's perfect.
PROFESSOR: Well it seems that our vegetables have not only taken root, but they've begun to grow at a most miraculous rate.
MARY ANN: Well just look they're popping up all over the place.
SKIPPER: Little buddy I want to complement you.
GILLIGAN: Thanks Skipper.
SKIPPER: You've really done a fine job. Put her there pal.

The Skipper shakes Gilligan's hand and Gilligan ends up pouring water from the watering can, all over the Skipper's shoes.

SKIPPER: Give me this.

The Skipper takes the watering can from Gilligan and dunks it in the water barrel to fill it up. He then places the nozzle of the can down the front of Gilligan's shirt. He fills up Gilligan's shirt until it looks like a beach ball.

Scene: the garden patch.
Mr. and Mrs. Howell are examining the garden.

MR. HOWELL: Oh look Lovey...Lovey look, look the...the mushrooms are...are mushing.
MRS. HOWELL: Yes, but the beets are beating them.
MR. HOWELL: Oh you had a witty one.
MRS. HOWELL: Oh thank you dear.
MR. HOWELL: Pretty soon the vegetables will be ready. Gilligan will pick them. Mary Ann will clean them, and Ginger will prepare them.
MRS. HOWELL: Yes, but on second thought, oughtn't we do something?
MR. HOWELL: Oh perish the thought. Every hive must have a Queen, the rest are workers.
MRS. HOWELL: Yes but I feel a little guilty. Maybe we should make some kind of an effort.
MR. HOWELL: Ah, what do you suggest?
MRS. HOWELL: Well ah...we could be a, host and hostess at a dinner party.
MR. HOWELL: A vegetarian do.

Scene: the garden patch.
Mary Ann pulls a carrot out of the ground and is odd looking. It appears to have a large body with four appendages sticking out.

MARY ANN: I never saw anything like this back on our farm. Except under a cow.

Scene: The communal table.
Gilligan, the Skipper, the Professor and Mary Ann are studying a large number of strange vegetables on the table.

MARY ANN: Strange looking vegetables. What are these?
GILLIGAN: Cucumbers, I think.
MARY ANN: Oh and what's this funny looking thing...corn?

Mary Ann hands the Skipper a circular ear of corn.

SKIPPER: Well I...I...I guess that this is budget corn Mary Ann.
MARY ANN: Budget corn?

The Skipper places the ring of corn over his head.

SKIPPER: Yes, a, making both ends meet.
GILLIGAN: They sure are funny looking.
SKIPPER: Well who cares what they look like. We've got fresh vegetables.
PROFESSOR: Perhaps being submerged in salt water has had an effect on the seeds.
MARY ANN: If my father ever saw string beans like this I think he'd faint.
GILLIGAN: They look more like pretzel beans.
SKIPPER: Pretzels...Oh if we only had some beer to go with them.

Scene: The communal table.
Everyone is seated at the table which has the vegetables on it. The radio is also on the table playing music.

GILLIGAN: Skipper, pass the spinach please.
SKIPPER: Oh Gilligan that's the forth helping of spinach you've had.
GILLIGAN: Sixth, I snuck two.
MR. HOWELL: Ah...Ah Ginger, would you please pass the artichokes my dear.
GINGER: Oh sure Mr. Howell, do you like them?
MR. HOWELL: Thank you. The way you prepared them reminds me of my chef Herman. The only thing about you that reminds me of my chef Herman.
SKIPPER: Professor, please the a, string beans.
MARY ANN: Mrs. Howell please pass the carrots.
MRS. HOWELL: Oh yes of course dear.
MARY ANN: Oh we don't grow carrots like this back home.
PROFESSOR: I never realised how much I missed vegetables until now.
GINGER: I think the two things that I miss the most are, are vegetables and dates.
GILLIGAN: We have plenty of dates here on the island.
GINGER: Not the kind I miss.
SKIPPER: Professor, please the a, the string beans?
MR. HOWELL: Would you ah...may I have the artichokes?
PROFESSOR: Since we all seem to have our favourite vegetables, let’s move them near us.
GILLIGAN: Spinach next to me.
MARY ANN: Oh the carrots please.
MRS. HOWELL: Oh I just love beets, I want the beets. I adore sugar beets.

The music is interupted by an announcer.

RADIO ANNOUNCER: We interrupt this program for a news bulletin from the experimental agricultural laboratories in Hawaii. It seems that a box containing radioactive seeds is missing.
PROFESSOR: Shhh everyone, I think he said something about seeds.
RADIO ANNOUNCER: The vegetable seeds were in a small wooden crate and individually packaged. These radioactive seeds are of an experimental nature and considered dangerous. The box is clearly labelled, danger, experimental, radioactive. On the chance they did not fall overboard, anyone finding them or knowing anything about them, please contact the agricultural department in Hawaii. Let me repeat. The seeds are radioactive and considered extremely dangerous. Now back to our program of cheery daytime tunes.

The Professor leans over and turns off the radio.

GINGER: Professor, do you suppose that…?
PROFESSOR: Well he did say that the crate was clearly labelled.
SKIPPER: Well...we...we...well when Gilligan showed us the crate it didn't have a cover on it did it.
GILLIGAN: I took the cover off.
PROFESSOR: Do you know where it is?
GILLIGAN: I made it into this bench right here.

Gilligan stands up and shows the top of the bench.

GILLIGAN: Nothing there, see.

He turns the bench over and underneath is the warning sign.
Fade out

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Scene The communal table.
The Professor is reading from a book speaking to the other castaways.

PROFESSOR: Of course this book is dated. It doesn't contain much information about the consumption of radioactive food. However, it does say that it's entirely possible that it could be fatal. But on the other hand it doesn't say it must be fatal. So you see there's no...

The Professor looks up to see everyone has passed out.

PROFESSOR: Now what could I have said to make them faint?

Scene: Gilligan and the Skipper’s hut.
Gilligan and the Skipper are laying in their hammocks. The Professor is seated at a table still reading from his book.

SKIPPER: Gilligan are you frightened?
GILLIGAN: No.
SKIPPER: You’re not?
GILLIGAN: I'm too scared to be frightened.
PROFESSOR: How dumb can I be?
SKIPPER: Dumb? Well you're the smartest man I ever knew.
PROFESSOR: How could I be so stupid? Of all the dumb...
SKIPPER: Well Professor a, don't call yourself dumb just cause you can't find a cure for this disease.
PROFESSOR: We're doing the wrong thing. Lying still could kill us. We should be moving around.

The three get up and run out of the hut to begin exercising.
Scene: The lagoon.
Mary Ann and the Skipper pacing back and forth.

MARY ANN: Oh Skipper I've got to sit down I'm exhausted.
SKIPPER: Don't sit down Mary Ann, come on now. Don't you remember the Professor said to keep our...our blood circulating, otherwise that radioactive stuff will settle in one place. Now come on.
MARY ANN: But I'm tired. After all I haven't got your legs.
SKIPPER: Well...we...well it's a good thing you haven't Mary Ann other wise you couldn't get in those shorts.

Mary Ann, looking out over the lagoon, spies something.

MARY ANN: Skipper, a boat look.
SKIPPER: Where?
MARY ANN: Over there.
SKIPPER: Where? I don't see anything.
MARY ANN: It's white with blue trim and...and has a bridge or something covered in glass and a lifeboat hanging on the end.
SKIPPER: Are you sure? I don't see anything. Mary Ann are you all right?
MARY ANN: Oh I'm feeling fi... Oh Skipper I'm not seeing things. There's a boat right over there.
SKIPPER: Professor. Quick. Mary Ann I think that radioactive stuff is making you see things. Professor. Quick. Come on Mary Ann.

Scene: Outside Gilligan and the Skipper’s hut.
Mary Ann and the Skipper come running from the lagoon looking for the Professor.

SKIPPER: Professor. Professor.
PROFESSOR: What's the matter?
SKIPPER: Where's...Oh there you are. Mary Ann sees a boat out there.
MARY ANN: It's white with blue trim.
PROFESSOR: But I don't see anything out there but water Mary Ann. MARY ANN: I can even see the people on the deck. Oh...there's a man in a red and white-stripped tee shirt. Another man in a, in a blue shirt and blue slacks, and two beautiful women in bikinis.
SKIPPER: Oh I wish I could see that.
PROFESSOR: But I don't see anything out there.
MARY ANN: I know I'm not imagining it. Why, it's just as plain as your book over there.
PROFESSOR: You can see my book?
MARY ANN: Well of course. It's on the stump. On the hill.
PROFESSOR: But that's a half a mile away.
MARY ANN: It's ah, turned to page one seventeen, some sort of chemical equation...three N O two plus H two O equals two H N O three plus N O.
PROFESSOR: Well that's incredible.
SKIPPER: Well but Professor, if she can see the book...maybe there is a boat out there.
MARY ANN: Why would I say there was a boat out there if there wasn't?
PROFESSOR: Well keep your eye on the boat just in case. Come on Skipper, let's go build a signal fire.

Mary Ann runs off back to the lagoon trying to signal the boat.

MARY ANN: Over Here. Oh come over here.
SKIPPER: Boy Professor, what a great time to be rescued. Now they can take us to the hospital and, and we can get cured of the radioactive what-cha-ma-call-it what ever it is.
PROFESSOR: Skipper that's it. That's the reason for her fantastic eyesight.
SKIPPER: What are you talking about?
PROFESSOR: Well Mary Ann ate those carrots. Now the radioactive treatment of those seeds must have magnified the carotene.
SKIPPER: Carotene?
PROFESSOR: Well that's the chemical in carrots that's necessary for good eyesight.
SKIPPER: Well then that proves that she saw that boat out there. Come on let's get this fire started. Gilligan!. Gilligan!

Gilligan comes running.

GILLIGAN: What are you doing?
SKIPPER: Well obviously Gilligan we're building a fire.
GILLIGAN: For a merit badge huh?
SKIPPER: No not for a merit badge. We're trying to signal that boat out there.
GILLIGAN: What boat?
SKIPPER: The boat out there.
GILLIGAN: I don't see any boat.
SKIPPER: Of course you don't.
GILLIGAN: Do you?
SKIPPER: No.
GILLIGAN: Professor do you see the boat?
PROFESSOR: Oh I can't see it either.
GILLIGAN: But it's out there right?
SKIPPER: Look, Mary Ann saw the boat out there.
GILLIGAN: Can you see Mary Ann?
SKIPPER: No, how can I see Mary Ann when she's not even here?
GILLIGAN: The same way you can see the boat.
SKIPPER: Gilligan will stop that. Will you go get some firewood for the fire?
GILLIGAN: To signal the boat that we can't see right?
SKIPPER: Exactly.
GILLIGAN: Professor, what kind of boat is it we can't see?
PROFESSOR: Ah...white with blue trim, and it's got two men and two women on it.
SKIPPER: Yeah, and the women are wearing bikinis.
GILLIGAN: Oooo, I wish I could see them even if they're not there.
SKIPPER: For the last time Gilligan, will you get over to that tree and get some fire wood for the fire?
GILLIGAN: I have a better idea.
SKIPPER: What?
GILLIGAN: Since we're make believing there's a boat, let's make believe we have a fire.
SKIPPER: Gilligan!
GILLIGAN: I'm going. You don't have to yell.
SKIPPER: Yes I do!. Now will you get the firewood?

Scene: A clearing.
Gilligan walks over to a fallen tree and grabs a branch. He lifts the tree off the ground.

GILLIGAN: Skipper? Where do you want it?
SKIPPER: Professor.

The Skipper and the Professor join Gilligan at the tree.

SKIPPER: Gilligan little buddy how did you pick that tree up?
GILLIGAN: With one hand.
SKIPPER: Wha...well it must be hollow.
PROFESSOR: Well it must weigh four or five hundred pounds.
SKIPPER: Oh that's ridiculous Professor. If it weighed four or five hundred pounds he couldn't lift it up.

The Skipper tries to pick up the tree by the same branch that Gilligan used but can't move it.

SKIPPER: I can't budge it. Gilligan, how did you do that?
PROFESSOR: Spinach, the spinach, Gilligan kept eating the spinach. The radioactive treatment of the seeds must have magnified the potency of the oxalic minerals. That's how you get strength from eating spinach.
SKIPPER: Well right now let's worry about that boat out there. Gilligan since you're so strong, break off those branches and get the fire going real good.

Gilligan breaks off a few of the branches.

SKIPPER: All right Gilligan now will you stop playing games and put it on the fire.

Mary Ann returns from the lagoon.

MARY ANN: Oh you can forget about the fire, the boats gone.
SKIPPER: Gilligan this is all your fault. If you hadn't found that crate of seeds out there...
PROFESSOR: Now hold it Skipper, hold it. We were all excited about finding those seeds, and he didn't know they were contaminated.
SKIPPER: Of course your right Professor, I'm sorry little buddy, forgive me.

The Skipper shakes Gilligan's hand.

SKIPPER: Gilligan will you let go. You're crushing my hand.
MARY ANN: What's happened?
PROFESSOR: Well it's those radioactive vegetables Mary Ann. They've given you fantastic eyesight and Gilligan super power. Well the potentials are unlimited. Why the increase in the potency of the vitamins alone could make us healthier than we ever were before.
SKIPPER: Yes if they don't kill us first.
GILLIGAN: Yeah, we'll be the healthiest dead people around.
PROFESSOR: Mrs. Howell?
MARY ANN: What about her?
PROFESSOR: Well she kept eating those sugar beets.
SKIPPER: Well so what.
PROFESSOR: Well sugar is energy. I wonder what effect it's had on her?

Scene: Mr. And Mrs. Howells hut
Mrs. Howell is tidying up the hut at super human speed.

MR. HOWELL: Lovey what has happened to you? Lovey slow down. I'm exhausted just watching you. At least take a coffee break.
MRS. HOWELL: Good idea.

Mrs. Howell sits and has some sugar beets. She gets up and races out the door.

MR. HOWELL: I may enter that woman in the Olympics.

Scene: The clearing.
Gilligan is lifting the Skipper, who is laying on a lounge chair, over his head.

SKIPPER: Hey Gilligan would you mind putting me down. I'm getting thirsty, I'd like to get something to drink.

Gilligan puts the Skipper back down on the ground.

SKIPPER: Thank you little buddy. Say, what about you? You've been doing all the exercise, aren’t you thirsty?
GILLIGAN: Oh yeah. I'll go get us some coconut milk.
SKIPPER: Fine.

Gilligan goes to a table with coconuts and picks one, but crushes it.

SKIPPER: Gilligan you're a walking disaster area. You've got to learn to be careful. Now pick up a coconut, but be gentle.

Gilligan picks up another coconut without breaking it.

SKIPPER: There...see, that's much better, now just toss it over here, Gilligan.

Gilligan throws the coconut and barely misses the Skipper as it sails through the wall of the hut.

SKIPPER: Gilligan I told you to be careful.
GILLIGAN: I'll fix it Skipper.

Gilligan runs over to the hut to fix the hole.

SKIPPER: No Gilligan don't touch it.

Gilligan makes the hole in the hut much bigger.

PROFESSOR: Skipper. Skipper. Gilligan.
SKIPPER: Wa...wa...what's happened?
PROFESSOR: I think I've found a cure for us.
SKIPPER: Wa...Great.
GILLIGAN: Yeah.
PROFESSOR: I've applied the principles of theoretic chemistry to the problem of radioactivity. Now the best preventative for the internal bombardment of radioactive particles is through their containment by hydrocarbons.
GILLIGAN: Would you mind repeating that?
PROFESSOR: Not at all. I've applied the principals of theoretic chemistry to the problem of radioactivity.
SKIPPER: Oh come on Professor, never mind all the scientific lingo. What are you trying to tell us?
PROFESSOR: That our best protection against the vegetables we've eaten is through hydrocar... well that is to say through plant fats. And the best source of plant fat is the soap we've been making here on the island.
GILLIGAN: Do you mean we have to take a bath with that soap?
PROFESSOR: No we shall have to consume it internally.
GILLIGAN: Oh thank goodness. For a minute there I thought we were going to have to eat it.

Scene: The supply hut.
The castaways are seated at the table with bars of soap in a plate on it. The Professor has a radioactivity measuring device beside him.

GINGER: Do we really have to eat soap Professor?
PROFESSOR: Absolutely.
GILLIGAN: It seems a shame to wash out my mouth with soap when I didn't say anything bad.
SKIPPER: Gilligan, you are going to eat a piece of soap and I'm going to sit here and see that you do. Now take a piece of soap. All right now, start eating. Gilligan...eat.
GILLIGAN: This stuff just tastes awful.
SKIPPER: Never mind that Gilligan, just do as the Professor says.

They eat the soap and bubbles begin to come out of everyone's mouths.

MARY ANN: Oh. Just call me bubbles.
GINGER: Oh my goodness. This could be the start of a whole new career. Ginger Grant, bubble dancer.

The Professor checks his device.

PROFESSOR: It's working, the hydrocarbons are absorbing the radioactivity. Keep eating.
GILLIGAN: When's this going to stop.
PROFESSOR: Everything's going to be all right.

Scene: Outside the supply hut.
There are soap bubbles floating all over the place.
Fade out

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Scene: Gilligan and the Skipper’s hut.
Gilligan is lying in his hammock as the Skipper prepares the door for the evening.

SKIPPER: Gilligan, the Professor said we're all cured. Isn't that good news?
GILLIGAN: Yeah, but that soap didn't taste bad after you got used to it.
SKIPPER: Oh I thought it tasted awful.

Gilligan takes a bite of the soap and hides it from the Skipper.

GILLIGAN: Mmmm, I thought it tasted good.
SKIPPER: Gilligan, are you eating something?
GILLIGAN: Me?
SKIPPER: Your not eating...your not eating any more of that soap?
GILLIGAN: What ever gave you that..hic..hic..hic..
SKIPPER: Gilligan? Gilligan?

As Gilligan continues to hiccup, a bubble forms. The bubble gets bigger and bigger. The Skipper places his fingers in his ears and the bubble explodes with a loud boom.
Fade out
End credits.

[Teebs]

That's just cold-blooded murder, is what that is.

They missed out my favourite bit! Namely-

GILLIGAN: What are you doing?
SKIPPER: We're trying to signal that boat out there.
GILLIGAN: What boat?
SKIPPER: The boat out there.
GILLIGAN: I don't see any boat.
SKIPPER: Of course you don't.
GILLIGAN: Do you?
SKIPPER: No.
GILLIGAN: Professor do you see the boat?
PROFESSOR: Oh I can't see it either.
GILLIGAN: But it's out there right?
SKIPPER: Look, Mary Ann saw the boat out there.
GILLIGAN: Can you see Mary Ann?
SKIPPER: No. How can I see Mary Ann when she's not even here?
GILLIGAN: The same way you can see the boat!

Thank you for all the pictures. That makes up for the fainting fit I had.

[ph1l]

That's my favourite sequence as well.
Honestly, they were probably better off just sticking in a WB cartoon instead.

[gilligan fanatic]

Ten minutes? That is so silly, why even bother when they cut two thirds of the episode

[Jack1000]

OMG!!! Who cut this like this!!!! (Station name?)

This is one of my favorite GI episodes!!!!

Jack

[ph1l]

Channel 9.
To be fair they showed Forward March at DVD length lately. But that is a such a rarity.
You expect 2 minutes these days but not the hatchet jobs they've done in the past.

[Steve Carras]

So then it's just an edit of a regular 30 minute episode..:whew:.So relieved.

PS Note PERMANENT avatar