The Holidays (don't read if easily depressed)

[CuriousMind90]

I hope this doesn't depress some here...But ever since I've been studying these cases, I've been thinking. As stupid as it may sound, hearing all these insanely tragic and horrible stories has kind of altered my outlook on life a bit. I feel more grateful for what I have, and I also feel a bit guilty for not appreciating the people in my life as much as I should, given that so many others have been robbed of loved ones.

Every year, a Christmas goes by at homes like those of the families of Kathy Hobbs, Tara Calico, Angela Hammond, Pamela June Ray and many other men and women who are taken from their families long before their time, and whose killers have yet to meet justice; Every year for those families there is a space at the dinner table where there should never have been, or in the case of Angela Hammond, two spaces missing--She was pregnant--and her child was denied a chance at ever even being born, and she herself was robbed of what should have been a long and happy life, and the theft of an innocent life, with the thieves going unpunished, is one of the most disheartening injustices in this human existence.

Every year that goes by, we surpass one of these innocent victims in age, and with every year we have on those victims, we should count that extra year as a borrowed one, and try to make the best of it, because tomorrow isn't guaranteed to any of us OR to anyone we love.

We should not forget in the course of the everyday drudgery of life just how lucky we are. Because for all of us who are alive, who are well, who have never lost a loved one in this way, we are luckier than we could ever imagine. And it's easy in the course of everyday life to forget this and what thousands of families out there deal with, and it's easy to take our lives and our loved ones for granted. I'm a rather young person, and I know most young people don't tend to think of this stuff--When you're young you tend to think you're invincible, or that in some odd way, you'll always be here, or that your loved ones will be always be with you. And so many don't stop to think of the plight of others.

I think knowing how horrible the world can be should make us all feel a little more grateful that we are as lucky as we are, and just maybe, hearing of some of these stories will make someone on here appreciate those around us a little bit more this holiday season.

I know that ever since I began hearing of these cases, I've kept all my friends a little bit closer.

[TheCars1986]

Originally Posted by CuriousMind90

I hope this doesn't depress some here...But ever since I've been studying these cases, I've been thinking. As stupid as it may sound, hearing all these insanely tragic and horrible stories has kind of altered my outlook on life a bit. I feel more grateful for what I have, and I also feel a bit guilty for not appreciating the people in my life as much as I should, given that so many others have been robbed of loved ones.

Every year, a Christmas goes by at homes like those of the families of Kathy Hobbs, Tara Calico, Angela Hammond, Pamela June Ray and many other men and women who are taken from their families long before their time, and whose killers have yet to meet justice; Every year for those families there is a space at the dinner table where there should never have been, or in the case of Angela Hammond, two spaces missing--She was pregnant--and her child was denied a chance at ever even being born, and she herself was robbed of what should have been a long and happy life, and the theft of an innocent life, with the thieves going unpunished, is one of the most disheartening injustices in this human existence.

Every year that goes by, we surpass one of these innocent victims in age, and with every year we have on those victims, we should count that extra year as a borrowed one, and try to make the best of it, because tomorrow isn't guaranteed to any of us OR to anyone we love.

We should not forget in the course of the everyday drudgery of life just how lucky we are. Because for all of us who are alive, who are well, who have never lost a loved one in this way, we are luckier than we could ever imagine. And it's easy in the course of everyday life to forget this and what thousands of families out there deal with, and it's easy to take our lives and our loved ones for granted. I'm a rather young person, and I know most young people don't tend to think of this stuff--When you're young you tend to think you're invincible, or that in some odd way, you'll always be here, or that your loved ones will be always be with you. And so many don't stop to think of the plight of others.

I think knowing how horrible the world can be should make us all feel a little more grateful that we are as lucky as we are, and just maybe, hearing of some of these stories will make someone on here appreciate those around us a little bit more this holiday season.

I know that ever since I began hearing of these cases, I've kept all my friends a little bit closer.

Well said. Now I want to go slip into PJ's and eat some Breyer's right out of the bucket.

[nohwheregirl]

Agreed. The older I get, the more the holidays become as much about loved ones who are *not* there as the ones sitting around the Christmas tree or the dinner table.

[Hambone2421]

Originally Posted by nohwheregirl

Agreed. The older I get, the more the holidays become as much about loved ones who are *not* there as the ones sitting around the Christmas tree or the dinner table.

Amen to that.

[SageSlowdive]

I hate to sound like the most evil person on Earth, but that's life, I guess. People are dying every day and people are being denied their human rights all around the world. Life is a strange, funny, and ultimately fulfilling experience that can only be had when someone has it lucky, i.e. money, true love, etc.

I find myself wondering about those people sometimes, like about a week ago, I had to stop at a payphone and immediately thought of Angela Hammond, and how she was probably killed that night.

[hostedbyrobertstack]

I definitely agree with the OP and I definitely look at my life a bit differently after this show, almost not as afraid of death, etc... I think so much of this is just very tragic. And, to the poster before me, yes, that is life, but most often, people in general always feel that this will never happen to them or that they are invincible. So, I just think it's good to not take this stuff for granted because anything can happen. These cases also seem much more real to me when I google map street view the locations, to think that these victims I had been watching for so long actually lived there/were murdered there, etc... It just gives it a dose of reality.

[Cori aka ChrisSCrush]

Absolute agreement, not just about the holidays but life in general.

Unsolved Mysteries came along at the perfect time for me. The first special was right after I graduated college, and the series a few years later. By then everyone was stuck on what a "loser" I was not to move out of the small town where I've lived most of my life, no doubt to some large community where I don't know a soul to do some job I don't understand or like, pay exorbitant rent to have to listen to every drunk and druggie in my apartment complex, and fall victim to an accident or crime before I get to know enough trustworthy people for any responsible person to even notice I was missing (or report it if they did.)

Even if my family got me back, what would they have? A traumatized kidnap victim or a dead body? Unsolved Mysteries gave me at least some justification that my life decisions were right, because I was still alive!

Granted, some of these people did things I would never do (walk to a store alone late at night in a city, go to an ATM alone late at night, or practically any time, get involved with a married man, or go alone to confront a guy who gave me a false name and address.) Many of them did things I would do or have done at those ages, including travel alone, and maybe some just had bad luck. Of course, many of these stories involve bad relationships, which I haven't had because I haven't had any relationships--never met anyone with enough in common with me to begin to bother. And granted, people with whom I went to college who did all of the above (crummy start-up jobs paying high rent to live in sleazy places and often bad relationships) went on to have nice families and do fine. But still, think how long some of these people have been gone--20, 30, 40 years or more. Think of where you were in life then, and remember...you're still alive!

[nohwheregirl]

Originally Posted by SageSlowdive

I hate to sound like the most evil person on Earth, but that's life, I guess.

You're totally right. Loss is a part of life. And the pain that comes with it. Having recently lost someone dear to me, I was reminded of how difficult and painful loss really is. I honestly forgot how bad it can get. I've vowed to be more compassionate to others because of it, and it helped me to appreciate my friends and family who supported me when I needed it.

[Oldschooler81]

Originally Posted by CuriousMind90

I hope this doesn't depress some here...But ever since I've been studying these cases, I've been thinking. As stupid as it may sound, hearing all these insanely tragic and horrible stories has kind of altered my outlook on life a bit. I feel more grateful for what I have, and I also feel a bit guilty for not appreciating the people in my life as much as I should, given that so many others have been robbed of loved ones.

Every year, a Christmas goes by at homes like those of the families of Kathy Hobbs, Tara Calico, Angela Hammond, Pamela June Ray and many other men and women who are taken from their families long before their time, and whose killers have yet to meet justice; Every year for those families there is a space at the dinner table where there should never have been, or in the case of Angela Hammond, two spaces missing--She was pregnant--and her child was denied a chance at ever even being born, and she herself was robbed of what should have been a long and happy life, and the theft of an innocent life, with the thieves going unpunished, is one of the most disheartening injustices in this human existence.

Every year that goes by, we surpass one of these innocent victims in age, and with every year we have on those victims, we should count that extra year as a borrowed one, and try to make the best of it, because tomorrow isn't guaranteed to any of us OR to anyone we love.

We should not forget in the course of the everyday drudgery of life just how lucky we are. Because for all of us who are alive, who are well, who have never lost a loved one in this way, we are luckier than we could ever imagine. And it's easy in the course of everyday life to forget this and what thousands of families out there deal with, and it's easy to take our lives and our loved ones for granted. I'm a rather young person, and I know most young people don't tend to think of this stuff--When you're young you tend to think you're invincible, or that in some odd way, you'll always be here, or that your loved ones will be always be with you. And so many don't stop to think of the plight of others.

I think knowing how horrible the world can be should make us all feel a little more grateful that we are as lucky as we are, and just maybe, hearing of some of these stories will make someone on here appreciate those around us a little bit more this holiday season.

I know that ever since I began hearing of these cases, I've kept all my friends a little bit closer.

Excellent post man, I completely agree. I actually have some firsthand knowledge of what the familes and friends of kidnapped/missing/deceased loved ones are going through, having lost all my grandparents by the time I was turning 12.

Even in 1994 I was really nostalgic for 1988 despite still being a kid. For several reasons, but especially that. Plus this was right around the time I got into UM, so I could really relate to what alot of their loves ones were going through. This has made me appreciate my still living relatives even more, especially ones that are getting older now.

The holidays I think are very polarized depending on your state of mind. If you're happy and have a big family, it's one of the most joyous occasions. But if you're already lonely or upset, it would increase even more.

[Cori aka ChrisSCrush]

It must be very hard for the families to know whether to buy presents for the missing loved one, and whether not doing so would mean they'd given up on them. Steven Stayner's family continued to buy him presents the whole time he was missing.