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Old 09-26-2010, 03:47 PM   #1
Family Ties Forever!
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Question Not Going

What do you think?

My mother asked me if I would go to Florida if she's able to get time off for Thanksgiving. My brother is being deployed to the Middle East at the beginning of December for 6 to 9 months. He's in the Navy.

As much as I would like to see my brother and the kids I'm not sure if I should go. I'm not sure I can afford to. I'm guessing I would have to pay for the plane ticket to and from. The last time I was in Florida I became very ill due to gall stones. It seems like every time I go to Florida I get sick in some way. Whether it's a cold, allergies, or something like gall stones.

If I don't go it makes me look like I don't want to which isn't the case. My mother and sister don't live with me anymore and I'm having to take over some of the bills. Also, if I go I will no doubt have to listen to how wonder it is for my mother and sister living at my mother's boyfriend's house. And of course my mother's boyfriend is going to Florida as well.

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Old 09-26-2010, 08:32 PM   #2
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You said it all right here--

You might not be able to afford it.
You dont feel like going to Florida right now after all the sickness from previous trips.
You certainly dont want to be around your Mother, sister or The Boy Friend at this time

Just send your regrets and relax.
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Old 09-26-2010, 11:41 PM   #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Family Ties Forever!
What do you think?

My mother asked me if I would go to Florida if she's able to get time off for Thanksgiving. My brother is being deployed to the Middle East at the beginning of December for 6 to 9 months. He's in the Navy.

As much as I would like to see my brother and the kids I'm not sure if I should go. I'm not sure I can afford to. I'm guessing I would have to pay for the plane ticket to and from. The last time I was in Florida I became very ill due to gall stones. It seems like every time I go to Florida I get sick in some way. Whether it's a cold, allergies, or something like gall stones.

If I don't go it makes me look like I don't want to which isn't the case. My mother and sister don't live with me anymore and I'm having to take over some of the bills. Also, if I go I will no doubt have to listen to how wonder it is for my mother and sister living at my mother's boyfriend's house. And of course my mother's boyfriend is going to Florida as well.
If you don't have the heart nor guts to go...don't.

She wasn't there for you (your mother) during your darkest hours and it's frustrating to see her. And if you DO want to go (or should), go by train or bus, which ever is cheaper. Sure, the trip may be longer...but it may be cheaper.

Ever since my grandfather died, things haven't been together for me and my family. We still try to go to events (Like the Milan Melon Festival) but for my dad to go...it just doesn't seem the same since his dad died and it's only me, him, and my mom.

And since I'm going to have a niece or nephew...we may be able to go to those events again...I'd like to take my niece or nephew to the Avon Duct Tape Festival....
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Old 09-27-2010, 12:55 AM   #4
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Default No dough, no go...

Tell your mother that you wish you could but you can't afford it. If she ponies up the dough, then reconsider.
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Old 10-03-2010, 06:08 PM   #5
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Thanks everyone for your thoughts.

I have decided not to go. I'm going to stay here.
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Old 10-03-2010, 09:40 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Family Ties Forever!
Thanks everyone for your thoughts.

I have decided not to go. I'm going to stay here.
Good for you, sweetie!! You poured your heart, body and soul out for all of them all those years and got nothing in return. So it's great that you are taking the time to take care of YOU.
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Old 10-04-2010, 03:32 PM   #7
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Smart decision. I'll keep you company on the phone.

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Old 10-04-2010, 04:55 PM   #8
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Talking

Thanks Monika.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Janice
Smart decision. I'll keep you company on the phone.

Thanks Janice. It's always so much fun chatting with you.
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Old 10-04-2010, 05:30 PM   #9
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Great decision, Jenny. Don't let someone else define how you should express your love for your brother. I'm sure he knows you do, and I'm sure you express it in many ways. And as the others said, if you can't afford it, you can't afford it.

Sorry I wasn't able to post sooner. Take care!
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Old 10-04-2010, 07:40 PM   #10
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Jenny...

Though you live in the Sun Belt, the economy can STILL take a toll in that area...especially for the last two years. Your mom treated you like **** during your darkest times in life, her boyfriend doesn't give a damn, and you could talk to your brother via e-mail.

You are family to us...Jenny!

Paul
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Old 10-05-2010, 12:52 AM   #11
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I agree!! You can always write to your brother - but seeing him with your mother around would most likely bring you much more hurt. You don't deserve that!!! I agree with Paul - WE'RE you're family, and we care about you very much!!!
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Old 10-06-2010, 08:46 AM   #12
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I'm glad, don't ever feel like they should define what or what not you should do.
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Old 10-06-2010, 10:30 AM   #13
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Thanks again everyone.
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Old 03-09-2011, 08:12 AM   #14
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did you tell the whole situation to your brother or not?
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