Episode Reviews: "Honeymooners Parody Skits from 1967 & 1971":

[Frank Gannucci]

Episode Reviews: "Honeymooners Parody Skits from 1967 & 1971":

1967

DVD: Attached to: "Jackie Gleason Presents: The Honeymooners: 'The Second Honeymoon.'"

This DVD includes a Color Honeymooners Promo that is similar to the syndicated opening of the show but the clips differ. I believe MPI made that promo as there is no CBS announcer promoting the show.

This skit took place on a 1967 episode of the Hollywood Palace. The guest host (Ray Bolger) introduces us to Audrey. Audrey walks on stage and they talk about how wonderful Jackie is. Audrey says that she wanted Alice to be a bus driver and Ralph do the housework. Cue to the skit.

The Kramden apartment is shown and naturally it is a FAR CRY from the real one for obvious reasons. Ralph is cooking something on the stove. The water from the pot on the stove is boiling with bubbles. Ralph tries to look for a lid so he uses a hat. He dances to music on the record player. I should mention that Ray Bolger didn't even wear something to make him look fat like Ralph. Alice comes home with her bus driver uniform on and turns off the record player. Alice: "I see that you have been tasting your own cooking again." Ralph encourages Alice to get with it. Alice: "You are going to get it. The Whatfistee." Ralph says he was dancing The Slop. Alice: "I have been fighting the traffic all day and you are dancing The Slop instead of cooking it." Ralph: "How many times have we have people over and you said that I was a great cook?" Alice: 'When a person is doubled-up with pain, they will say anything." Ralph says that he has been busy fixing Alice's favorite dish. Alice tries it. She says it has too much sugar. Ralph tastes it and agrees. Ralph: "How sweet it is." Alice tells Ralph to hurry up because she has an important meeting with the Raccoons. Ralph says that all day long he has been doing the houswork. Sometimes, he had to do a couple of housework-realted things twice. Alice: "You wouldn't have to if you did it right the first time."

Ralph says that when he was dancing, he was dancing for Alice. They are having a charity picnic down at the ranch for the ladies bus drivers jamboree. Alice: "Yeah, I know the LBJ Ranch." Audience laughs. For obvious reasons, the line wouldn't be funny today. According to Ralph, letters were sent to bus driver's husbands asking to participate. Ralph says he will. Alice says no. Alice: "I have no intention of having my husband on stage and..." (shaking her hips): "...shaking his hips." Alice says that she would be embarrassed. Alice: "I am the boss. You are nothing. I am the King. I mean Queen." Ralph: "There is a wonderful prize for the winner. Alice: "That lets you out right away." Ralph: "When we went to Roseland, everybody wanted to dance with me." Alice: "Those Navy Waves on lashore leave? When they got off the boat, they would have danced with anyone." Ralph says that he is a fine dancer and that his mom had a theatrical background. Alice: "Tell her not to turn around and nobody will notice it." Ralph: "My cousin Herbert was in a motion picture." Alice: "He was a big star. He appeared in a Army Training film."

Ralph says that he was only entering the contest for Alice so she can get the first prize. A Marbalized Bowling Bowl. Alice is remorseful. Alice says that she is just jealous because Ralph has got talent. Alice: "I can't stand the thought of seeing you dancing on stage with a bunch of blond mechanics whistling at you. Ralph says that at the Jamboree, they have another dancing contest in which they can enter as a team. Alice is overjoyed. Alice puts a record on the record player and they dance The Lindee Hop. Audience cheers. Alice says that he is a wonderful dancer. Ralph: "Only when I am dancing with you Alice." Alice: "Ralph, you are the greatest." Ray says that Audrey is the greatest. This skit was almost a complete reversal of the traditional Kramden antics, wasn't it?

1971
DVD: Attached to "Jackie Gleason Presents: The Honeymooners: "Valentine's Special."

This DVD includes a Color Honeymooners Promo that is similar to the syndicated opening of the show but the clips differ. I believe MPI made that promo as there is no CBS announcer promoting the show.

When MPI originally announced that they were going to be releasing the "Second Honeymoon" & "Valentine's Special", they said that the bonuses were going to be Honeymooners skits from the 60s. This one is from '71 and it is from the TV Show called: "The Kopykats Kopy T.V." Alice (Shelia Macrae) is home at the Kramden apartment. The Kramden apartment for obvious reasons is a lot different from the real set but it is closer than the one that was on the Hollywood Palace and more closely resembles the set than the one in the Honeymooners Movie that everyone wants to forget. Alice says that supper is ready. Ralph (George Kerby) comes out. See, Cedric the Entertainer was not the first black person to play Ralph. George somewhat sounds like Ralph too. I should also mention that for this skit, they had Ralph being fat again. (In the last season of the Color Honeymooners, Jackie Gleason lost weight. To explain this on the show, they said that RAlph lost weight of course.) Alice was preparing a birthday cake for Ralph. Ralph is happy. He also got a card. Ralph: "It's written by hand." Alice: "I didn't know that you knew anybody that can write." The card: "To someone special n this special day/there is one thing I like to say/Your kind of man only happens once in a blue moon/and believe me, that is plenty, you big babboon." Ha!
Ralph is "upset" but you can tell that George is not visably upset.

Ed (Rich Little) comes in. He wishes Ralph a happy birthday. Rich sounds liks Ed too. Ralph: "Did you write that Norton?" Ed: "No, I don't have a pen that writes underwater." Alice: "You don't even know that Ed wrote that." Ed: "A man is innocent until he is proven guilty. That is the code of the sewer." Ralph asks Ed to sit down and write so he can tell for sure that Ed wrote that. Ed wips the seat and warms up. Naturally, this upsets Ralph. Ralph yells at Ed to get on with the writing. Ed: "Gee, what a grouch. How do you spell baboon." Ralph: "How should I know?" Ed: "You are the baboon, aren't you?" Alice looks at the handwriting and knows it wasn't Ed that wrote that. Ralph realizes it too. Ralph is remorseful. Ed says that he wanted to come down and give Ralph his birthday present. His present? A long belt that according to Ed, went around two salesmen. Ed also gave Ralph a card. Ralph (reading the card): "Dear Ralph: On your birthday, I bought you a belt/to show you how I always felt/I sure hope it does a job and hold up the pants of a big, fat slob." Ralph is angry at Ed and chases Ed out.