I'm feeling lost. Need advice, please. - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Family Ties Forever! · 11-16-2009, 01:57 AM

I feel embarrassed to write this, but I need some advice from my friends. If you don't consider me a friend, then please move on, because I've had all the bashing I can take. I was recently attacked, in a post, by a person that I've never done anything to at all. It was very mean. It was the cruelest thing anyone has ever said to me. I don't want to name the person, but many of you probably know what happened anyway. I've been very open about my life here. I was molested by my stepfather when I was a little girl. I was attacked in a holdup at gunpoint four years ago. This was all made worse by the fact that I am legally blind. I've learned that verbal abuse can hurt as much as physical abuse. Sometimes it's the scars you don't see that hurt the most.

I've been crying for two days and having nightmares. I can't get those cruel words out of my mind. I was in therapy for years but stopped. I have an appointment this week to see a therapist. I thought my days of being attacked were over. I'm trying to take hold of my emotions before they take hold of me. Has anyone ever been in a situation similar to this, where you've been verbally attacked, in public for no reason, by someone you barely knew? I appreciate any advice. I'm not trying to start any trouble on the boards, so please, don't go there. None of what this person wrote is true. I'm just so confused and sad.

dakert · 11-16-2009, 02:39 AM

I would just put the offending user on Block and try to forget about it.

ArchiesDingbat · 11-16-2009, 02:51 AM

may b it was constructive criticism & u took it the wrong way

Hollow · 11-16-2009, 03:21 AM

these replies so far (besides the third), wow just wow.

i know how you feel. everyone has emotionally assassinated me, even the person i trusted with all of my broken heart. i think an important lesson in life is that lifelasting kindness in humans does not exist. the soul of everyone, no matter who they are, will eventually rot away and make you miserable. it's quite accurate that only the good die young, because it happens before their value wears off. i find that accepting that reality doesn't totally prevent the pain of future betrayals, but it lessens it due to the reduced disappointment.

you're on the right track by seeing a therapist and also by letting out your emotions to those who will listen. i've studied mental health and i can attest that keeping it all to yourself would just amplify the feelings. i think you would benefit from cognitive therapy so you can overcome the mental demons and build a stronger immunity to future emotional abuse.

TV Knowledge Fan · 11-16-2009, 03:22 AM

...and if therapy can help you, then by all means, try it. I used to be picked on when I was in junior high and my early years in high school....and I felt like you at times. But by the time I became a senior, it just...ceased. I know it's not the same situation, and it's not that easy with you, 'Family', but you'll come through this as I did. Nobody should make anyone feel rotten- even you.

ArchiesDingbat · 11-16-2009, 03:39 AM

^ i'm confused are you both asking for advice?

Family Ties Forever! · 11-16-2009, 03:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArchiesDingbat

may b it was constructive criticism & u took it the wrong way

I can tell the difference between constructive criticism and verbal abuse. Is there a good way to interpret...

"maybe you need to even have a date... wait, I take that back, you probably will never be able to get one without paying the poor guy. " or

"you're the little sh*t that couldn't".

or "Just GET A LIFE!"

Also, I don't know this person, and I never asked for an opinion or an analysis of myself. I'm not doing that now either. I'm simply asking if anyone's ever been bullied, or verbally abused, for no reason, not that any reason is acceptable.

Janice · 11-16-2009, 03:45 AM

Jenny, it's late, and I'll write more tomorrow. Just know that I'm here for you, and I value your friendship a great deal. I think you're only guilty of being my friend. I think things will be calmer around here in the future, so take heart in knowing that it won't happen again. In fact, TJ was on the case so fast that I didn't know about it until it was over, so not many people saw that evil blast. You wouldn't have seen it if the author didn't PM it to you.

Janice · 11-16-2009, 03:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArchiesDingbat

^ i'm confused are you both asking for advice?

No, only Jenny is asking for advice. I was trying to assist her with multiple quotes, but it didn't work for me either, so it's all clear now.

ponytail · 11-16-2009, 06:40 AM

Years ago I had a supervisor who would do mean things or say something to embarrass me in front of others. I never did anything to her. Why she picked on me I'll never know. But it was hurtful. I have always had self esteem problems and she didn't help. On top of that she won the lottery. I have moved on and have forgiven her. I hope you can do the same. I have dealt with verbal abuse through out my life and it can scar you. You have to shake it off, these people have problems and it makes them feel superior to make you feel inferior, but only if you let it.

PunkyP0WER · 11-16-2009, 10:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janice

No, only Jenny is asking for advice. I was trying to assist her with multiple quotes, but it didn't work for me either, so it's all clear now.

yeah, she was trying to assist jenny with multiple personalities...er, quotes

it surely is "all clear" now

Mr. Television · 11-16-2009, 11:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PunkyP0WER

yeah, she was trying to assist jenny with multiple personalities...er, quotes

it surely is "all clear" now

Hey Kim. Keep it up. If you want a fight, you're going to get one. I can not stand internet bullies and that's what you have turned into. You and you're little group...nothing but trolls...all of you.

PunkyP0WER · 11-16-2009, 11:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Clint Eastwood Fan

Hey Kim. Keep it up. If you want a fight, you're going to get one. I can not stand internet bullies and that's what you have turned into. You and you're little group...nothing but trolls...all of you.

unfortunately, like everyone else that has been bannished, i'm not allowed to tell my side. anytime, i try to offer compelling proof that jenny/janice are 1 in the same it gets deleted.

guess someone has something to hide.

Mr. Television · 11-16-2009, 11:47 AM

Jenny, I know it hurts. The person who said this is very cruel. You are such a nice person and don't deserve to be bullied by these internet bullies. I know they say that words don't hurt but they do especially when you've gone through things in your life that you've been through. I can't even imagine. All I can say is that you're better than these people. Whoever said this is nothing but a bully hiding behind a computer. Just remember that you have friends that will support you.

Brian Damage · 11-16-2009, 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PunkyP0WER

yeah, she was trying to assist jenny with multiple personalities...er, quotes

it surely is "all clear" now

Hey, Kim you know what is clear to me, you were somebody that always asked for prayers because your "husband" has cancer. Maybe you should worry more about him and his life than a ****ing message board with online friends.....idiot.

11-16-2009, 01:57 AM	#1
Family Ties Forever! Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Apr 16, 2002 Location: Keaton residence Posts: 10,214	I'm feeling lost. Need advice, please. I feel embarrassed to write this, but I need some advice from my friends. If you don't consider me a friend, then please move on, because I've had all the bashing I can take. I was recently attacked, in a post, by a person that I've never done anything to at all. It was very mean. It was the cruelest thing anyone has ever said to me. I don't want to name the person, but many of you probably know what happened anyway. I've been very open about my life here. I was molested by my stepfather when I was a little girl. I was attacked in a holdup at gunpoint four years ago. This was all made worse by the fact that I am legally blind. I've learned that verbal abuse can hurt as much as physical abuse. Sometimes it's the scars you don't see that hurt the most. I've been crying for two days and having nightmares. I can't get those cruel words out of my mind. I was in therapy for years but stopped. I have an appointment this week to see a therapist. I thought my days of being attacked were over. I'm trying to take hold of my emotions before they take hold of me. Has anyone ever been in a situation similar to this, where you've been verbally attacked, in public for no reason, by someone you barely knew? I appreciate any advice. I'm not trying to start any trouble on the boards, so please, don't go there. None of what this person wrote is true. I'm just so confused and sad.
	__________________ Jenny

11-16-2009, 03:22 AM	#5
TV Knowledge Fan Member Senior Member Join Date: Mar 29, 2006 Location: Long Branch, N.J. Posts: 2,577	I'd consider you a friend.... ...and if therapy can help you, then by all means, try it. I used to be picked on when I was in junior high and my early years in high school....and I felt like you at times. But by the time I became a senior, it just...ceased. I know it's not the same situation, and it's not that easy with you, 'Family', but you'll come through this as I did. Nobody should make anyone feel rotten- even you.

11-16-2009, 02:39 AM	#2
dakert Member Forum 3000 Club Member Join Date: May 10, 2007 Location: Altoona PA Posts: 3,411	I would just put the offending user on Block and try to forget about it.

11-16-2009, 02:51 AM	#3
ArchiesDingbat Banned Banned!! Occasional Poster Join Date: Aug 20, 2009 Posts: 24	may b it was constructive criticism & u took it the wrong way

11-16-2009, 03:21 AM	#4
Hollow Member Forum Superstar Join Date: Dec 16, 2001 Posts: 30,406	these replies so far (besides the third), wow just wow. i know how you feel. everyone has emotionally assassinated me, even the person i trusted with all of my broken heart. i think an important lesson in life is that lifelasting kindness in humans does not exist. the soul of everyone, no matter who they are, will eventually rot away and make you miserable. it's quite accurate that only the good die young, because it happens before their value wears off. i find that accepting that reality doesn't totally prevent the pain of future betrayals, but it lessens it due to the reduced disappointment. you're on the right track by seeing a therapist and also by letting out your emotions to those who will listen. i've studied mental health and i can attest that keeping it all to yourself would just amplify the feelings. i think you would benefit from cognitive therapy so you can overcome the mental demons and build a stronger immunity to future emotional abuse.

11-16-2009, 03:39 AM	#6
ArchiesDingbat Banned Banned!! Occasional Poster Join Date: Aug 20, 2009 Posts: 24	^ i'm confused are you both asking for advice?

11-16-2009, 03:45 AM	#8
Janice Retired Admin - Hollywood Swingin' Forum Legend Join Date: Aug 03, 2001 Location: Beantown Posts: 36,388	Jenny, it's late, and I'll write more tomorrow. Just know that I'm here for you, and I value your friendship a great deal. I think you're only guilty of being my friend. I think things will be calmer around here in the future, so take heart in knowing that it won't happen again. In fact, TJ was on the case so fast that I didn't know about it until it was over, so not many people saw that evil blast. You wouldn't have seen it if the author didn't PM it to you.

11-16-2009, 06:40 AM	#10
ponytail Member Forum 4000 Club Member Join Date: Mar 20, 2004 Location: In Happy, Healthy, Wealthyville Posts: 4,273	Years ago I had a supervisor who would do mean things or say something to embarrass me in front of others. I never did anything to her. Why she picked on me I'll never know. But it was hurtful. I have always had self esteem problems and she didn't help. On top of that she won the lottery. I have moved on and have forgiven her. I hope you can do the same. I have dealt with verbal abuse through out my life and it can scar you. You have to shake it off, these people have problems and it makes them feel superior to make you feel inferior, but only if you let it.

11-16-2009, 11:47 AM	#14
Mr. Television 23 Years at Sitcoms Online Forum Icon Join Date: Jun 06, 2003 Location: Somewhere you're Not Posts: 62,132	Jenny, I know it hurts. The person who said this is very cruel. You are such a nice person and don't deserve to be bullied by these internet bullies. I know they say that words don't hurt but they do especially when you've gone through things in your life that you've been through. I can't even imagine. All I can say is that you're better than these people. Whoever said this is nothing but a bully hiding behind a computer. Just remember that you have friends that will support you.