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Old 09-07-2009, 01:35 AM   #1
Family Ties Forever!
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Question Was I Wrong?

Was I wrong?

I mentioned something while in the car Sunday and I think I might have inadvertenly hurt my sister's feelings. I mentioned to my mother that my friend Marne who I've known since March 1981 called and invited me to go to dinner to catch up and just chat. I have known Marne a lot longer than my sister Becky (born 1992). Next thing I know Becky is telling my mother "that she wants to talk to her in private later." We got home. I went upstairs and Becky started talking to my mother. Basically Becky expects to go with. She doesn't think it's fair that I was invited and she wasn't.

It's very rare that I ever get invited anywhere. The fact that I was invited to go somewhere is nice, but almost unusal simply because it doesn't happen often. Marne works and well has other friends, etc. I'm not exactly what you might call cool. When I am invited somewhere by a friend regardless of which friend I jump (not literally) at the opportunity. Marne lives way across town.

The thing is if I were to bring Becky anywhere with me when I'm going to go spend time with any of my friends it would be a nightmare. Becky would continuously interupt. She would also embarrass me by her table manners etc. Becky eats as fast as she can and takes huge bites at a time. My mother and I have tried for years on end without success to break Becky of that.

Even if I hadn't mentioned it in the car, Becky would have found out when I go to dinner sometime this week (mid-to-late in the week).
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Old 09-07-2009, 01:41 AM   #2
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No Jenny you were not wrong. You have the right to have your own friends. And you have the right to spend time alone with them. If your sister really wants to spend time with you then why not do something else just with her and then you can go to dinner by yourself with your friend.
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Old 09-07-2009, 01:52 AM   #3
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No, you definitely weren't in the wrong. Your sister is just going to have to learn to accept that she can't go with you everywhere.
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Old 09-07-2009, 01:58 AM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marvo301
No Jenny you were not wrong. You have the right to have your own friends. And you have the right to spend time alone with them. If your sister really wants to spend time with you then why not do something else just with her and then you can go to dinner by yourself with your friend.
I do take my sister places. I take her to the movies, to the store, to lunch, etc. She and I spend time together.
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Old 09-07-2009, 02:08 AM   #5
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I think it's pretty nervy of your sister to assume she should get to come along. I'd be angry if I were you.
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Old 09-07-2009, 02:15 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Family Ties Forever!
I do take my sister places. I take her to the movies, to the store, to lunch, etc. She and I spend time together.
Then she has nothing to complain about and no reason to invite herself along to your dinner with your friend.
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Old 09-07-2009, 02:16 AM   #7
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No, I don't think you were wrong, Jenny.
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Old 09-07-2009, 02:30 AM   #8
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no I also don't think you were in the wrong
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Old 09-07-2009, 03:09 AM   #9
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No, I don't think you were wrong at all. Becky's 17 - she needs to have her own life with her own friends.

If Becky can't understand that you have your own life and your own friends and that you are entitled to some "me" time with your friends, that's her problem, not yours.
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Old 09-07-2009, 03:10 AM   #10
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No, you're not wrong, and please don't let her guilt you into tagging along. She takes the cake. Sometimes literally, lol. If you don't mind my asking, what's your mother's take on this?
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Old 09-07-2009, 03:20 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Janice
No, you're not wrong, and please don't let her guilt you into tagging along. She takes the cake. Sometimes literally, lol. If you don't mind my asking, what's your mother's take on this?
lol at the cake joke. Actually, I'm not sure what my mother's thoughts are on the subject. I'm not sure I want to know. I have a feeling that she's on Becky's side. Of course I don't know that for sure.
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Old 09-07-2009, 06:12 AM   #12
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As others have said you are not in the wrong.

She is your friend and you are entitled to your own time with them.
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Old 09-07-2009, 04:12 PM   #13
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No, you weren't wrong Jenny. If my sisters wanted to tag along with me I'd die, LOL. You have a right to have your own friends and spend time with them by yourself. Your sister needs to hang out with her own friends and accept the fact that she can't go everywhere with you.
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