July 4th Quotes (a day late): - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 07-05-2009, 04:21 PM

"Champagne & Caviar":

(Ralph wants Ed to not be at the Kramden apartment because he is afraid he is going to embarrass Ralph when Ralph's boss gets there.)

Ed: "I am planning to go to the movies with Trixie."

Ralph: "I insist you got a movie."

Ed: "All right. Show the boss what you are made of. You deserve the best. After all, it's men like you that make America great."

"TV or Not TV":

Alice: "You couldn't get a TV set like everybody else. Oh no! You had to drag this poor soul to help you buy it and when the poor soul wants to watch the TV, you got to pick on him."

Ed: "That's what you do. You pick, pick, pick."

Ralph: "Oh shut up!"

"Pal O' Mine":

Ralph: "Butter on my finger?" (yells): 'AT 89 CENTS A POUND?" (normally): "Will you stop throwing my money around? Is there any lard here?"

Alice: "Yeah, about 300 pounds of it."

"Goodbye Aunt Ethel Part One":

Ralph: "I'm going to take a shower."

Aunt Ethel: "Would you mind if I brushed my teeth first?"

Ralph: "Give them to me and I will do them for you."

"Box Top Kid Part 2":

Ralph: "When he gets here, I am you and you are me. You got it?"

Ed: "Yes. I am not Ralph Kramden. You're Ralph Kramden. I am not Ralph Kramden. You're Ralph Kramden..."

Ralph (yells): "NO!"

"Young Man With A Horn":

(Ed washes and dries the bugle while whistling.)

Ed: "Oh, I bet that this thing ought to blow like a bell now."

(Ed plays "reville".)

Ralph (yells): "COME ON!"

"Without Reservations":

(Everyone is in the really broken-down hotel.)

Ralph (to Ed): "You keep it up and you won't even be a bellhop. You'll be a..."

Alice: "Why don't you make him a guest? Nothing can be worse than that."

"Flushing Ho":

(Ralph explains all the things that "irritated" Ed. They sound like things that
shouldn't irritate Ed.)

Ralph: "I also had to go to work without my bath. That's what I did to him."

Trixie: "You didn't have to do that Ralph. You could take you bath at the circus. They wouldn't mind bathing one more elephant."

"Six Months To Live":

Mailman: "I was told to give this letter to Mrs. Kramden."

Ralph (taking the letter): "I'm MR. Kramden."

(The mailman holds out his hand. He is possibly expecting a tip.)

Ralph: "Your hand is very dirty."

Happy July 4th!

07-05-2009, 04:21 PM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,041	July 4th Quotes (a day late): "Champagne & Caviar": (Ralph wants Ed to not be at the Kramden apartment because he is afraid he is going to embarrass Ralph when Ralph's boss gets there.) Ed: "I am planning to go to the movies with Trixie." Ralph: "I insist you got a movie." Ed: "All right. Show the boss what you are made of. You deserve the best. After all, it's men like you that make America great." "TV or Not TV": Alice: "You couldn't get a TV set like everybody else. Oh no! You had to drag this poor soul to help you buy it and when the poor soul wants to watch the TV, you got to pick on him." Ed: "That's what you do. You pick, pick, pick." Ralph: "Oh shut up!" "Pal O' Mine": Ralph: "Butter on my finger?" (yells): 'AT 89 CENTS A POUND?" (normally): "Will you stop throwing my money around? Is there any lard here?" Alice: "Yeah, about 300 pounds of it." "Goodbye Aunt Ethel Part One": Ralph: "I'm going to take a shower." Aunt Ethel: "Would you mind if I brushed my teeth first?" Ralph: "Give them to me and I will do them for you." "Box Top Kid Part 2": Ralph: "When he gets here, I am you and you are me. You got it?" Ed: "Yes. I am not Ralph Kramden. You're Ralph Kramden. I am not Ralph Kramden. You're Ralph Kramden..." Ralph (yells): "NO!" "Young Man With A Horn": (Ed washes and dries the bugle while whistling.) Ed: "Oh, I bet that this thing ought to blow like a bell now." (Ed plays "reville".) Ralph (yells): "COME ON!" "Without Reservations": (Everyone is in the really broken-down hotel.) Ralph (to Ed): "You keep it up and you won't even be a bellhop. You'll be a..." Alice: "Why don't you make him a guest? Nothing can be worse than that." "Flushing Ho": (Ralph explains all the things that "irritated" Ed. They sound like things that shouldn't irritate Ed.) Ralph: "I also had to go to work without my bath. That's what I did to him." Trixie: "You didn't have to do that Ralph. You could take you bath at the circus. They wouldn't mind bathing one more elephant." "Six Months To Live": Mailman: "I was told to give this letter to Mrs. Kramden." Ralph (taking the letter): "I'm MR. Kramden." (The mailman holds out his hand. He is possibly expecting a tip.) Ralph: "Your hand is very dirty." Happy July 4th!