Monday's Quotes:

[Frank Gannucci]

"Stars Over Faltbush":

Ralph: "Let's face it Alice. You are the fat of the land."

Alice: "Let's face it Ralph. You ARE the fat of the land."

"Young At Heart":

Ed: "As time wore on, I grew older. I matured."

Ralph: "Yeah, now you are a full-grown nut."

"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":

Ralph: "How will they know that I am a member of the Hurricanes?"

Alice: "Just open your mouth."

"The $99,000 Answer":

Ralph: "$600. Peanuts, peanuts. What am I going to do with peanuts?"

Alice: "Eat 'em like any other elephant."

"Ralph Kramden Presents":

Ralph: "Jackie Gleason is down at that fun and sun capital of the world."

Ed: "What is he doing down at Perth Amboy?"

"Principle of The Thing":

(Ralph & Ed are about to redecorate the apartment.)

Alice: "If you ask me, this wall shouldn't be papered. It should be padded."

(She leaves.)

Ralph: "Ooh, just once. Bang!"

"In 25 Words Or Less":

(The waiter makes crepe zuzzets [Franch pancakes], he starts a fire on his grill. Ralph sees it and puts the fire out with a fire extinguisher.)

Ralph: "It's a good thing I was here or the whole boat would have been on fire."

Alice: "Ralph, those were French pancakes."

Ralph: "I don't care what started the fire."

"Ralph's Sweet Tooth":

(Ed comes in wearing shorts.)

Ed: "It's the latest thing. It's about time that we men broke the chains of convention. We have been prisoners long enough."

Ralph: "You keep wearing that and you will be in prison all over again."

"Follow The Boys":

Ed (reading a crossword puzzle): "'Four-letter word for place of dwelling.' House. H-o-s-e. That's the trouble with these things. They are not a challenge."

Alice: "Yeah, they are easy. Easy: E-z-y."