Friday's Quotes & Ralph Kramden, a NY/NJ NHL fan? (Part 2)

[Frank Gannucci]

(The Carolina Hurricanes beat the NJ Devils 2-1.)

(Ralph & Ed just watched the game at the Raccoon Lodge.)

Ralph: “Oh boy! The Devils blew a one game lead. The Devils better shape up. Aw well, they have time.”

Ed: “Take a look at that anti-New Jersey Devils fan. Joe Fenstablau.”

Joe: “Now, I have to listen to you guys gloat.”

Ralph: “Yup, and we will be gloating until one of our teams wins it all. The Stanley Cup. When they do, they will drink and drink and drink and get wasted.”

Ed: “Or maybe they will get drunk.”

Ralph: “That IS wasted you dope.”

Joe: “Well, I have a feeling that both of your teams will fall.”

Ralph: “To who? Ha ha ha ha.”

Ed: “How about...the Philadelphia Flyers. This is Philly's year. They won the World Series.”

Ralph: “Don't remind me. I am still trying to get over the shock of the Yankees not even being IN the playoffs last year.”

Joe: “I think Philly will win it and I will make a bet with you. If Philly wins, you will give you $20. If one of your teams wins, I will give you $20.”

Ralph: “Deal and you will lose you know why? Our teams have it all.”

(Ralph & Ed sing a made-up song called: “Have It All.”)

(Jackie Gleason walks on stage. Audience applauds.)

Jackie: “Thank you. How sweet it is. GOOD NIGHT!”

(Audience cheers.)

"Stars Over Flatbush":

Ed: "I was born under the sign of Pisces The Fish."

Ralph: "You were born under the sign of Pistachio The Nut."

"Stars Over Flatbush":

Freddie: "The party will be going from 8 to 12pm."

Ed: "That includes 11:30pm, doesn't it?"

"A Man's Pride":

Ralph: "I am going to learn from here on in how to swallow my pride."

Ed: "That shouldn't be too hard. You learned how to swallow everything else."

"A Matter of Record":

Ralph: "I can't use two seats."

Ed: "That is a matter of opinion."

"Young At Heart":

Ralph: "This isn't a crazy costume. This is what all of us cats wear. I got it! I got it! I am hip! Ready to go. I'm gone. Gone!"

Alice: "You are gone all right."

"Case Of The Cuckoo Thief":

Alice: "I was thinking about buying the alarm clock for someone."

Ralph: "For who?"

Alice: "For, um…my brother."

Ralph: "If there is one thing that your family doesn't need, it's another cuckoo."

"Case Of The Cuckoo Thief":

Ed (starting to cry): "What are you going to do to me?"

Bruce: "I would like to rip the cuffs off your pants. I'm going to have you incarcerated."

Ed: "Good, as long as I'm not going to jail."

"To Whomever It May Concern":

Ed: "I put SWAK on the back of your letter."

Ralph: "You wrote Sealed with a Kiss?"

Ed: "No. Sewer Workers Are Kings."

"A Weighty Problem Part 1":

Ralph (knocking on door): "Got any mashed potatoes out there?"

(Door opens.)

Ralph: "I said do you have any mashed potatoes out there?"

Cook: "We don't even have anything else to throw away."