Sunday's Quotes: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 03-08-2009, 04:24 PM

"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":

Ralph: "This is my guest and I'm your employer."

Thelma: "Some guest and some employer. The SIMP and the BLIMP."

"A Little Man Who Wasn't There":

Ed: "A doctor once told me that I had a split-personality. I was two people. One was Ed Norton: The gay, carefree man-about-town. The other one was Ed Norton: The sober, serious-minded thinker."

Ralph: "What happened?"

Ed: "I got cured. I got cured. I am now one person. I am Ed Norton: The sober, serious-minded thinker."

"Petticoat Jungle":

(Ed picks up a cricket bat.)

Ed: "What is it used for?"

Ralph: "To kill crickets."

"Petticoat Jungle":

Ed: "How would you like to bag an elephant Alice?"

Alice: "I already did."

"TV or Not TV":

Ralph: "You once said: 'Ralph, I will be happy to live in a tent with you.'"

Alice: "I still am. I think it would be an improvement."

"A Promotion Part 1":

(Ralph has just told Alice not to tell the Nortons about his promotion, but unbeknownst to Ralph, she did.)

Ralph: "I have been promoted. I am now an executive."

Ed: "What a surprise."

(Ed tries to act like he's surprised.)

Ralph (to Alice): "So you told him huh?"

"Vacation At Fred's Landing":

Ed (looking at a map): "Here's New York City, that is where we started from. Then we go through the Lincoln Tunnel. This black dot here is Jersey City. This black dot here is Bayoone."

Ralph: "Well, Bayoone moving. That's an ant."

Ed: "Let's follow the ant. He looks like he knows where he is going."

"Ralph Kramden Inc.":

Ralph: "I am not nervous, Alice. I am not nervous. I may be a little excited about inheriting $40,000,000, but I am not nervous."

(Ralph polishes his sock.)

Alice: "You are not nervous Ralph. You are not nervous at all. You just read in Esquire about how the well-dressed man always polishes his sock."

"Rafitti, Brooklyn Style":

Ralph: "For once you are right. Alice should have married Johnny Farell. He's a much smarter guy than I am."

Alice's Mom: "So you admit it."

Ralph: "Sure. He took one look at you and refused to marry her."

03-08-2009, 04:24 PM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,041	Sunday's Quotes: "A Woman's Work Is Never Done": Ralph: "This is my guest and I'm your employer." Thelma: "Some guest and some employer. The SIMP and the BLIMP." "A Little Man Who Wasn't There": Ed: "A doctor once told me that I had a split-personality. I was two people. One was Ed Norton: The gay, carefree man-about-town. The other one was Ed Norton: The sober, serious-minded thinker." Ralph: "What happened?" Ed: "I got cured. I got cured. I am now one person. I am Ed Norton: The sober, serious-minded thinker." "Petticoat Jungle": (Ed picks up a cricket bat.) Ed: "What is it used for?" Ralph: "To kill crickets." "Petticoat Jungle": Ed: "How would you like to bag an elephant Alice?" Alice: "I already did." "TV or Not TV": Ralph: "You once said: 'Ralph, I will be happy to live in a tent with you.'" Alice: "I still am. I think it would be an improvement." "A Promotion Part 1": (Ralph has just told Alice not to tell the Nortons about his promotion, but unbeknownst to Ralph, she did.) Ralph: "I have been promoted. I am now an executive." Ed: "What a surprise." (Ed tries to act like he's surprised.) Ralph (to Alice): "So you told him huh?" "Vacation At Fred's Landing": Ed (looking at a map): "Here's New York City, that is where we started from. Then we go through the Lincoln Tunnel. This black dot here is Jersey City. This black dot here is Bayoone." Ralph: "Well, Bayoone moving. That's an ant." Ed: "Let's follow the ant. He looks like he knows where he is going." "Ralph Kramden Inc.": Ralph: "I am not nervous, Alice. I am not nervous. I may be a little excited about inheriting $40,000,000, but I am not nervous." (Ralph polishes his sock.) Alice: "You are not nervous Ralph. You are not nervous at all. You just read in Esquire about how the well-dressed man always polishes his sock." "Rafitti, Brooklyn Style": Ralph: "For once you are right. Alice should have married Johnny Farell. He's a much smarter guy than I am." Alice's Mom: "So you admit it." Ralph: "Sure. He took one look at you and refused to marry her."