Thursday's Quotes:

[Frank Gannucci]

"$99,000 Answer":

(Ralph just told Herb that he was a bus driver.)

Herb Norris: "One time I was waiting for a bus in the pouring rain. I saw a bus coming. I signaled for the bus to stop but instead the driver drove the bus in the puddle and I got all dirty."

Ralph: "Was that you?"

(Herb didn't know that the bus driver was Ralph because he didn't see him.)

"Cottage For Sale Part 2":

(The gang is in the lemon of a cottage.)

Alice: "Ralph, give me the frying pan out of the suitcase?"

Ralph: "You are going to cook something for us?"

Alice: "No, I am going to hit you right on top of your head with it."

"Cottage For Sale Part 1":

Ralph: "You have no foresight. You can't see this far in front of your nose."

Alice: "And that is another thing. I need glasses."

"Rafitti, Brooklyn Style":

(Ralph enters the room. Alice's Mom doesn't see him.)

Alice's Mom: "Hello Ralph!"

Ralph: "Hello! How did you know it was me?"

Alice's Mom: "I could hear the floor sag."

"Flushing Ho":

Ralph: "Because of Ed, I had to go to work without my bath."

Trixie: "You didn't have to do that Ralph. You could take your bath at the circus. They wouldn't mind bathing one more elephant."

"Flushing Ho":

Ralph: "I watched you tonight. Four pork chops. Four pork chops."

Ed: "What are you complaining about? You had six."

Ralph: "What, are you counting?"

"A Matter of Life & Death":

Ralph: "In six months, I will be dead."

Ed: "Doctors can be wrong too you know. Take a friend of mine for instance. The doctor gave him six months to live. Boy, did he make a monkey out of that doctor."

Ralph: "What happened?"

Ed: "He lived for almost eight months."

"The Safety Award":

(Alice & Trixie have the same dress on.)

Ralph: "Don't those dresses look alike?"

Ed: "Alike? They are like the Bobbsie Twins."

"Boys & Girls Together":

(Ralph comes home to a candlelit dinner.)

Alice: "Hello Ralph!"

Ralph: "So you forgot to pay the electric bill, huh?"