S.A.T. Questions - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

lilhave · 02-05-2009, 06:56 AM

S.A.T. TEST QUESTIONS

The following questions and answers were actually collected from SAT tests given in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16-year-old students! (Don't laugh too hard----one of these kids may be the President someday.)

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections?
A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U.

Q: What is the Fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian Section."
A: The caesarian section is a district in Rome.

Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.

Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.

Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab wears on his head.

Q: What is a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs.

Harvey

Chocoholic · 02-05-2009, 03:42 PM

Either those kids are smart alecks, or they really are stupid.

phoebe7165 · 02-05-2009, 03:52 PM

Hey, don't just pin this on 16 year olds, I'm sure there are plenty of adults who would answer something similar!!

phoebe7165 · 02-05-2009, 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lilhave

Q: What is a terminal illness?
A: When you are sick at the airport.

That's the way I felt when the last airline I flew with charged me $40 to check a suitcase and a garment bag!!

Chocoholic · 02-05-2009, 03:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by phoebe7165

Hey, don't just pin this on 16 year olds, I'm sure there are plenty of adults who would answer something similar!!

Yes, there are quite a few real-life Lowell Mathers out there.

MickeyMac · 02-05-2009, 06:53 PM

There is a lack of basic knowledge and there is plenty of blame to go around, and I agree its not just teenage kids. I know people my age who couldnt tell you who the last five presidents were. One of the reasons why I read.

phoebe7165 · 02-05-2009, 08:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ChesneyLady

Yes, there are quite a few real-life Lowell Mathers out there.

:

phoebe7165 · 02-05-2009, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MickeyMac

There is a lack of basic knowledge and there is plenty of blame to go around, and I agree its not just teenage kids.

I feel that way everytime I watch Trivial Pursuit:America Plays!!

02-05-2009, 06:56 AM	#1
lilhave Member Senior Member Join Date: Jul 03, 2004 Location: N.Y.C. Posts: 2,294	S.A.T. Questions S.A.T. TEST QUESTIONS The following questions and answers were actually collected from SAT tests given in Springdale, Arkansas in 2000 to 16-year-old students! (Don't laugh too hard----one of these kids may be the President someday.) Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election. Q: What are steroids? A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs. Q: What happens to your body as you age? A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death. Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow. Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (E.g., abdomen.) A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A, E, I, O, and U. Q: What is the Fibula? A: A small lie. Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarian Section." A: The caesarian section is a district in Rome. Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport. Q: Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature? A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas. Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight. Q: What is a turbine? A: Something an Arab wears on his head. Q: What is a Hindu? A: It lays eggs. Harvey
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02-05-2009, 03:52 PM	#3
phoebe7165 Pop Culture Goddess Forum Fanatic Join Date: Apr 15, 2003 Location: US of A - the country of "really bad music" lovers Posts: 11,600	Hey, don't just pin this on 16 year olds, I'm sure there are plenty of adults who would answer something similar!!
	__________________ Rest in Peace to my Penny-pie. You really were a GREAT dog. I'll see you at the Rainbow Bridge. Penny 9/1/97-12/9/09 Rescued animals make the best pets. Opt to Adopt!!

02-05-2009, 03:42 PM	#2
Chocoholic Member Forum Star Join Date: Dec 01, 2000 Location: Between a rock and a hard place. Posts: 11,235	Either those kids are smart alecks, or they really are stupid.

02-05-2009, 06:53 PM	#6
MickeyMac Member Forum Star Join Date: Jun 18, 2008 Location: Kalamazoo, Michigan Posts: 19,008	There is a lack of basic knowledge and there is plenty of blame to go around, and I agree its not just teenage kids. I know people my age who couldnt tell you who the last five presidents were. One of the reasons why I read.