Election Day Quotes & Honeymooners TV Schedule (11/07-11/17): - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 11-04-2008, 11:00 PM

All Color quotes from "The People's Choice":

#1

(Ralph looks outside the window as Ed blows air into his paper bag and pops it. Ralph thinks that he has been shot and screams in pain. When he realizes what Ed did, he gets mad at Ed. Alice comes out.)

Alice: "What happened?"

Ralph: "Babyhead (Ed) had to break a paper bag."

#2

(Mr. Miller & Mr. Weaver want Ralph to run for Assembly.)

Mr. Miller: "I read some of his (Ralph's) interviews in the newspaper. He doesn't sound smart."

Mr. Weaver: "That is what we want. A stupid hero."

#3

Ralph: "I'm a hero. A hero. A heeero. Do you know what a hero is?"

Alice: "Yeah, a fat sandwich."

"People's Choice Part 2":

(Ralph & the rest of the gang are on the street with instruments [including Ed wearing a drum with suspenders], and advertisements that say: "Vote For Kramden.")

Man: "What do you know about an assemblyman?"

Ralph (giving the signal to Ed to start playing his drum that gives Alice the signal to play the cymbals): "What do I know about being an assemblyman? What do I know about being an assemblyman?" (hitting Ed): "What do I know about being an assemblyman? I'll tell you what I know about being an assemblyman."

(Ed plays his drums & Alice plays the cymbals while Ralph mouths words.)

(The music stops.)

Ralph: "That's what I know about being an assemblyman. Do you have any other questions?"

Man: "Yes. When did you four nuts escape?"

"The People's Choice Part 2":

Ralph (reading his speech to a couple): "'Friends, pretty soon it will be time to go to the polls and vote. You can vote for a guy like me, Ralph Kramden. A fearless citizen who has captured such ruthless people as Bullets Durgem or you can vote for the other guy, that dirty bum, Harvey Porter. If you elect me, I will give you honest government'..."

Woman: "Come on John."

(They leave.)

Ralph: "I'll put new parks in the benches. I'll..." (yells): "SHE WON'T BE SUCH A RIOT AFTER YOU MARRY HER."

"Forgot To Register":

Alice: "Harper is for people like us."

Ralph: "Harper is not for people like us. Penrose is for the little man and I am a little man. Don't you dare say it"

All from "The Deciding Vote":

#1

Alice: "You mean to tell me that you didn't vote for Frank McGillicuddy?"

Ed: "McGuillicuddy? I don't even know how to spell his name."

#2

Ralph: "All right Ed. If you did not not vote for me, than who did?"

Ed: "Joe Rumsey."

Ralph: "Joe Rumsey. That's impossible. Why would he do that?"

Ed: "Remember that vaccum cleaner you gave him. He tried it out. He didn't do so well with the oatmeal test either."

#3

(Ralph & Ed turn on the vacuum but it doesn't suck up dirt.)

Ed: "I think that motor needs a drop of erl."

Ralph: "Yeah, that is all that it needs. A drop of oil."

Alice: "A drop of oil? It wouldn't help if you dipped it in Texas."

(AmericanLife TV):

(AmericanLife also has an OnDemand Service. This show might be one of the shows to watch.)

TV-G

All times are Eastern.

Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie Norton.

Fri. Nov. 7 10a & Sat. Nov. 8, 2008 12a #30 (aka #183) – “Follow The Boys”: When the wives complain that their husbands don't fuss over them anymore, Ralph and Ed come up with a compromise: one night a week will be "boys' night out," the other nights they will spend with Alice and Trixie. But this is just another scheme that backfires on Ralph, who is planning to wear out the wives on the first night, but overcomes himself with exhaustion instead. (VCR Plus Code for Fr.: 2397. For Sat. 86007.)

Fri. Nov. 14 10a & Sat. Nov. 15, 2008 12a #38 (aka #191) – “Play It Again Norton”: The Honeymooners wreck havoc on a cross-country tour. Our two willing but not-so-able boobs (Ralph & Ed) enter a song contest sponsored by movie star Washington Kenmore (played by Paul Lynde). The prize: $25,000 and a Hollywood trip. The problem: entrants must be under 18. (VCR Plus Code for Fri.: 4608. For Sat.: 48004.)

(WPIX) & (WPIX HD) [CW11]

TV-G

All times are Eastern.

Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Audrey Meadows as Alice Kramden. Joyce Randolph as Trixie Norton.

Mon. Nov. 10, 2008 1a #019 (aka #109) - "Ralph Kramden Inc.": Ralph needs a loan from Norton, so he sells him a share of his future earnings as a corporation---Ralph Kramden, Inc. It's another con job by Ralph, of course, until he learns that an old woman with a $40 million estate died and left him in her will. That's enough for Norton, as an officer in the corporation, to remind Ralph about one "small detail"---that they need to bring a suitcase to the reading of the will to carry home the $40 million.

1:30a #017 (aka #107) - "The Baby-sitter": Ralph signals his displeasure when he learns that Alice had a telephone installed in the apartment. Then later, when he calms down, he overhears a telephone conversation and thinks that she is having an affair.

Mon. Nov. 17, 2008 1a #030 (aka #120) - "The Loudspeaker": Ralph thinks he'll be named Raccoon of the Year, so he begins writing his acceptance speech (if he could only get rid of his hiccups). It's a very distinctive honor, he reminds the skeptical Alice, because it entitles the two of them to "free burial privileges in the Raccoons' national cemetery in Bismarck, North Dakota."

1:30a #031 (aka #121) - "On Stage": "Polo ponies." "On Stage" (originally telecast April 28, 1956) actually began, says co-writer Leonard Stern, "with that one word...and we built a whole sketch around it." And it's that single word---pronounced by Norton (Art Carney) to rhyme with monopolies---that has almost single-handedly made this a favorite among Honeymooners fans. The episode begins with Ralph getting a juicy part in a play being mounted by the Raccoon Lodge's Women's Auxiliary. Suddenly Ralph is strutting around like the Barrymore of Bensonhurst and entertaining dreams that a Hollywood producer in the audience will offer him a contract. But before the actual performance, there's a rehearsal with Norton---and that word---to contend with.

Note: Looks like WPIX has stopped the viewers choice hour because zap2it claims that these episodes will air on these dates.

WPIX
Mon, Nov 10, 1:00 AM
VCR+: 81958

WPIX HD
Mon, Nov 10, 1:00 AM
VCR+: 20774

WPIX
Mon, Nov 10, 1:30 AM
VCR+: 16132

WPIX HD
Mon, Nov 10, 1:30 AM
VCR+: 59720

WPIX
Mon, Nov 17, 1:00 AM
VCR+: 47727

WPIX HD
Mon, Nov 17, 1:00 AM
VCR+: 93833

WPIX
Mon, Nov 17, 1:30 AM
VCR+: 63253

WPIX HD
Mon, Nov 17, 1:30 AM
VCR+: 19369

(WGN America) (Not WGN’s Chicago feed):

Sun. Nov. 9, 2008 12a #61 (aka #134/#15) (CC) – “‘Goodnight Sweet Prince’/‘Jellybeans’”: (For “Goodnight Sweet Prince”): When Ralph gets night shift duty he finds it impossible to sleep during the day. Everyone in the neighborhood gives him advice on sleeping, which only makes Ralph more nervous and irritable. (For “Jellybeans”): Ralph loses Alice's dress money when he schemes to win a jellybean contest. (VCR Plus Code: 774335.)

9p #50 (aka #137) (CC) - *“Love Letter”: Ralph fears Norton and Alice are having an affair after finding a love letter from Norton he thinks is intended for Alice. (VCR Plus Code: 803151.)

9:30p #51 (aka #37/#22) (CC) – “‘Guest Speaker’/‘Lost Job’”: (For “Guest Speaker”): Ralph keeps getting interrupted while practicing his speech for the Raccoon Lodge meeting. (For “Lost Job”): Ralph is sure he's been fired when he gets a pink slip in his paycheck. (VCR Plus Code: 803151.)

Sun. Nov. 16, 2008 12a #54 (aka #45) (CC) - *“Letter to the Boss”: Ralph mistakenly thinks a he's been fired and, with Norton's help, writes a nasty letter to his boss. After mailing the letter, Ralph finds out he's been promoted and schemes to get the letter back.
CLASSIC QUOTE -"Homina, homina, homina" (VCR Plus Code is unavailable.)

9p #52 (aka #62) (CC) – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part One)”: Ralph must sleep on a cot in the kitchen when Alice's Aunt Ethel comes to visit. Ralph pretends he has a bad back to force her out, but Aunt Ethel stays to nurse Ralph back to health. (VCR Plus Code: 235968.)

9:30p #53 (CC) – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part Two)”: Ralph and Ed introduce Aunt Ethel to the neighborhood butcher, hoping the two will get married and Aunt Ethel will leave. (VCR Plus Code: 409061.)

*: This episode has been edited HEAVILY.

(WNET) & (WNET HD) (NY PBS affiliate):

Thu. Nov. 13, 2008 9p (CC) (if this special is being shown in your area, your time may vary): "Jackie Gleason: Genius At Work": Various clips are shown of Jackie Gleason showing his comedic brilliance. VCR Plus Code: 79042. For WNET HD: 5874.)

11-04-2008, 11:00 PM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,067	Election Day Quotes & Honeymooners TV Schedule (11/07-11/17): All Color quotes from "The People's Choice": #1 (Ralph looks outside the window as Ed blows air into his paper bag and pops it. Ralph thinks that he has been shot and screams in pain. When he realizes what Ed did, he gets mad at Ed. Alice comes out.) Alice: "What happened?" Ralph: "Babyhead (Ed) had to break a paper bag." #2 (Mr. Miller & Mr. Weaver want Ralph to run for Assembly.) Mr. Miller: "I read some of his (Ralph's) interviews in the newspaper. He doesn't sound smart." Mr. Weaver: "That is what we want. A stupid hero." #3 Ralph: "I'm a hero. A hero. A heeero. Do you know what a hero is?" Alice: "Yeah, a fat sandwich." "People's Choice Part 2": (Ralph & the rest of the gang are on the street with instruments [including Ed wearing a drum with suspenders], and advertisements that say: "Vote For Kramden.") Man: "What do you know about an assemblyman?" Ralph (giving the signal to Ed to start playing his drum that gives Alice the signal to play the cymbals): "What do I know about being an assemblyman? What do I know about being an assemblyman?" (hitting Ed): "What do I know about being an assemblyman? I'll tell you what I know about being an assemblyman." (Ed plays his drums & Alice plays the cymbals while Ralph mouths words.) (The music stops.) Ralph: "That's what I know about being an assemblyman. Do you have any other questions?" Man: "Yes. When did you four nuts escape?" "The People's Choice Part 2": Ralph (reading his speech to a couple): "'Friends, pretty soon it will be time to go to the polls and vote. You can vote for a guy like me, Ralph Kramden. A fearless citizen who has captured such ruthless people as Bullets Durgem or you can vote for the other guy, that dirty bum, Harvey Porter. If you elect me, I will give you honest government'..." Woman: "Come on John." (They leave.) Ralph: "I'll put new parks in the benches. I'll..." (yells): "SHE WON'T BE SUCH A RIOT AFTER YOU MARRY HER." "Forgot To Register": Alice: "Harper is for people like us." Ralph: "Harper is not for people like us. Penrose is for the little man and I am a little man. Don't you dare say it" All from "The Deciding Vote": #1 Alice: "You mean to tell me that you didn't vote for Frank McGillicuddy?" Ed: "McGuillicuddy? I don't even know how to spell his name." #2 Ralph: "All right Ed. If you did not not vote for me, than who did?" Ed: "Joe Rumsey." Ralph: "Joe Rumsey. That's impossible. Why would he do that?" Ed: "Remember that vaccum cleaner you gave him. He tried it out. He didn't do so well with the oatmeal test either." #3 (Ralph & Ed turn on the vacuum but it doesn't suck up dirt.) Ed: "I think that motor needs a drop of erl." Ralph: "Yeah, that is all that it needs. A drop of oil." Alice: "A drop of oil? It wouldn't help if you dipped it in Texas." (AmericanLife TV): (AmericanLife also has an OnDemand Service. This show might be one of the shows to watch.) TV-G All times are Eastern. Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Shelia MacRae as Alice Kramden. Jean Kean as Trixie Norton. Fri. Nov. 7 10a & Sat. Nov. 8, 2008 12a #30 (aka #183) – “Follow The Boys”: When the wives complain that their husbands don't fuss over them anymore, Ralph and Ed come up with a compromise: one night a week will be "boys' night out," the other nights they will spend with Alice and Trixie. But this is just another scheme that backfires on Ralph, who is planning to wear out the wives on the first night, but overcomes himself with exhaustion instead. (VCR Plus Code for Fr.: 2397. For Sat. 86007.) Fri. Nov. 14 10a & Sat. Nov. 15, 2008 12a #38 (aka #191) – “Play It Again Norton”: The Honeymooners wreck havoc on a cross-country tour. Our two willing but not-so-able boobs (Ralph & Ed) enter a song contest sponsored by movie star Washington Kenmore (played by Paul Lynde). The prize: $25,000 and a Hollywood trip. The problem: entrants must be under 18. (VCR Plus Code for Fri.: 4608. For Sat.: 48004.) (WPIX) & (WPIX HD) [CW11] TV-G All times are Eastern. Jackie Gleason as Ralph Kramden. Art Carney as Ed Norton. Audrey Meadows as Alice Kramden. Joyce Randolph as Trixie Norton. Mon. Nov. 10, 2008 1a #019 (aka #109) - "Ralph Kramden Inc.": Ralph needs a loan from Norton, so he sells him a share of his future earnings as a corporation---Ralph Kramden, Inc. It's another con job by Ralph, of course, until he learns that an old woman with a $40 million estate died and left him in her will. That's enough for Norton, as an officer in the corporation, to remind Ralph about one "small detail"---that they need to bring a suitcase to the reading of the will to carry home the $40 million. 1:30a #017 (aka #107) - "The Baby-sitter": Ralph signals his displeasure when he learns that Alice had a telephone installed in the apartment. Then later, when he calms down, he overhears a telephone conversation and thinks that she is having an affair. Mon. Nov. 17, 2008 1a #030 (aka #120) - "The Loudspeaker": Ralph thinks he'll be named Raccoon of the Year, so he begins writing his acceptance speech (if he could only get rid of his hiccups). It's a very distinctive honor, he reminds the skeptical Alice, because it entitles the two of them to "free burial privileges in the Raccoons' national cemetery in Bismarck, North Dakota." 1:30a #031 (aka #121) - "On Stage": "Polo ponies." "On Stage" (originally telecast April 28, 1956) actually began, says co-writer Leonard Stern, "with that one word...and we built a whole sketch around it." And it's that single word---pronounced by Norton (Art Carney) to rhyme with monopolies---that has almost single-handedly made this a favorite among Honeymooners fans. The episode begins with Ralph getting a juicy part in a play being mounted by the Raccoon Lodge's Women's Auxiliary. Suddenly Ralph is strutting around like the Barrymore of Bensonhurst and entertaining dreams that a Hollywood producer in the audience will offer him a contract. But before the actual performance, there's a rehearsal with Norton---and that word---to contend with. Note: Looks like WPIX has stopped the viewers choice hour because zap2it claims that these episodes will air on these dates. WPIX Mon, Nov 10, 1:00 AM VCR+: 81958 WPIX HD Mon, Nov 10, 1:00 AM VCR+: 20774 WPIX Mon, Nov 10, 1:30 AM VCR+: 16132 WPIX HD Mon, Nov 10, 1:30 AM VCR+: 59720 WPIX Mon, Nov 17, 1:00 AM VCR+: 47727 WPIX HD Mon, Nov 17, 1:00 AM VCR+: 93833 WPIX Mon, Nov 17, 1:30 AM VCR+: 63253 WPIX HD Mon, Nov 17, 1:30 AM VCR+: 19369 (WGN America) (Not WGN’s Chicago feed): Sun. Nov. 9, 2008 12a #61 (aka #134/#15) (CC) – “‘Goodnight Sweet Prince’/‘Jellybeans’”: (For “Goodnight Sweet Prince”): When Ralph gets night shift duty he finds it impossible to sleep during the day. Everyone in the neighborhood gives him advice on sleeping, which only makes Ralph more nervous and irritable. (For “Jellybeans”): Ralph loses Alice's dress money when he schemes to win a jellybean contest. (VCR Plus Code: 774335.) 9p #50 (aka #137) (CC) - “Love Letter”: Ralph fears Norton and Alice are having an affair after finding a love letter from Norton he thinks is intended for Alice. (VCR Plus Code: 803151.) 9:30p #51 (aka #37/#22) (CC) – “‘Guest Speaker’/‘Lost Job’”: (For “Guest Speaker”): Ralph keeps getting interrupted while practicing his speech for the Raccoon Lodge meeting. (For “Lost Job”): Ralph is sure he's been fired when he gets a pink slip in his paycheck. (VCR Plus Code: 803151.) Sun. Nov. 16, 2008 12a #54 (aka #45) (CC) - “Letter to the Boss”: Ralph mistakenly thinks a he's been fired and, with Norton's help, writes a nasty letter to his boss. After mailing the letter, Ralph finds out he's been promoted and schemes to get the letter back. CLASSIC QUOTE -"Homina, homina, homina" (VCR Plus Code is unavailable.) 9p #52 (aka #62) (CC) – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part One)”: Ralph must sleep on a cot in the kitchen when Alice's Aunt Ethel comes to visit. Ralph pretends he has a bad back to force her out, but Aunt Ethel stays to nurse Ralph back to health. (VCR Plus Code: 235968.) 9:30p #53 (CC) – “Goodbye Aunt Ethel (Part Two)”: Ralph and Ed introduce Aunt Ethel to the neighborhood butcher, hoping the two will get married and Aunt Ethel will leave. (VCR Plus Code: 409061.) *: This episode has been edited HEAVILY. (WNET) & (WNET HD) (NY PBS affiliate): Thu. Nov. 13, 2008 9p (CC) (if this special is being shown in your area, your time may vary): "Jackie Gleason: Genius At Work": Various clips are shown of Jackie Gleason showing his comedic brilliance. VCR Plus Code: 79042. For WNET HD: 5874.)