You know you watch too much Barney Miller when... - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Ireneparalegal · 05-11-2008, 02:41 PM

You begin to criticize the coffee everywhere you go, including Starbucks.

You think every detective is a playboy.

You think every cop or detective should wear designer suits.

You walk into your local police station and ask to speak to Detective Wojo.

You walk into your local police station and ask for the detective who resembles that man in the Godfather movie.

You walk into your local police station and ask for the detective who is puerto rican.

You watch ALICE and are shocked that Det. Wentworth ended up a low-paid waitress at a cheesy diner and changed her name, obviously to protect her identity.

catlover79 · 05-11-2008, 05:13 PM

You have a massive crush on the Puerto Rican detective.

The captain's family disappears.

You request that Yemana NOT make you coffee.

You assume every curly-haired man with glasses knows everything.

You think every old man becomes a foster parent after retirement.

OH Nuts! · 05-11-2008, 11:46 PM

You get mad cravings for:

* prune juice
*bookie sheets
* long drawn out stories by annoying older detectives
*policemen whose last names have c, j, w and x's in them

catlover79 · 05-12-2008, 12:10 AM

You can do a perfect vocal impression of Gregory Peck.

You buy day old bread and throw it at pigeons.

You have a tendency to break out into rapid-fire Spanish when you get upset.

You have a sudden urge for brownies.

You think you are turning into a werewolf.

OH Nuts! · 05-12-2008, 10:30 PM

You have mad cravings for $700 Gucci shirts and $500 Valentino belts

You wished all cops dressed in drag

Mikado · 05-17-2008, 10:06 PM

- You assume that all detective squads work out of the top floor of a dingy police station building
- You keep a signed baseball at your work space
- You get a big cheesy 70s mustache "Cause I look SO good, Barney!"
- You'll only eat brownies if they are laced with hash !!

- You run to the bathroom every 20 minutes
- You spend all your time in your office, listening to the ravings of a senile old man
- You answer the phone with "Moshii Moshii"

LeeBlue · 05-19-2008, 03:16 PM

you walk into a police station and expect to see Bernice.

you see a uniformed policeman and think he should look like Officer Levitt.

OH Nuts! · 05-20-2008, 10:06 AM

plain old brownies just don't do it for you anymore

you must see at least one short ambitious policeman each day

You get strong cravings for REALLY AWFUL coffee

Everytime you see a box of prunes you think of Fish

CWDogg · 05-21-2008, 09:02 PM

You want to learn to play "bass guitar"

You spend all day in one room

You start crossdressing

You quit you're job and adopt a bunch of kids

Ireneparalegal · 05-21-2008, 09:04 PM

^^^^Everyone's posts...

catlover79 · 05-21-2008, 11:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CWDogg

You want to learn to play "bass guitar"

You spend all day in one room

You start crossdressing

You quit you're job and adopt a bunch of kids

catlover79 · 08-30-2008, 12:28 AM

You must wear the widest ties/lapels you can find.

You start rambling on about "me and Foster, Kleiner and Brown".

You were/are crushed to learn that Gregory Sierra (Chano) left the show.

catlover79 · 09-03-2008, 02:10 PM

You faint every time you get a shot.

You feel the urge to assault the candy machine that shortchanged you.

You wonder why Wentworth moved to Arizona, changed her name and became a waitress at a dumpy diner called Mel's.

You wonder why Chano became a South American revolutionary named El Puerco.

You get excited every time Abe Vigoda does a sketch on Conan O'Brien.

catlover79 · 11-25-2008, 11:12 PM

You use phrases like "cook-a-boos" and "boo-hoos" a la Inspector Lugar.

You get frustrated every time someone misspells/mispronounces your long last name a la Wojo.

JAlanRuss72 · 11-26-2008, 12:32 AM

You think you might be a werewolf (and you have to get up early to go to worrrrrrrrk)

You live in terror of a heavy rain.

Your hobbies include crawling around in the sewers looking for alligators and jewel thieves.

Your favorite color for a room is olive drab green.

Every tie you own is striped and you hate (and I mean HATE) not rolling your sleeves up and unbuttoning your dress shirts.

You think the Hassidic Jewish community should just "calm down and maybe take a shave".

It's perfectly NORMAL to take seperate vacations from your spouse. The change will do you both GOOD.

05-11-2008, 02:41 PM	#1
Ireneparalegal LEGAL SPICE ;) Forum Legend Join Date: Jul 25, 2005 Location: OXNARD, CA - WHERE THE DALLAS COWBOYS TRAIN & PRACTICE Posts: 38,691	You know you watch too much Barney Miller when... You begin to criticize the coffee everywhere you go, including Starbucks. You think every detective is a playboy. You think every cop or detective should wear designer suits. You walk into your local police station and ask to speak to Detective Wojo. You walk into your local police station and ask for the detective who resembles that man in the Godfather movie. You walk into your local police station and ask for the detective who is puerto rican. You watch ALICE and are shocked that Det. Wentworth ended up a low-paid waitress at a cheesy diner and changed her name, obviously to protect her identity.
	__________________ DALLAS COWBOYS ARE HERE AT TRAINING CAMP!!!

05-11-2008, 05:13 PM	#2
catlover79 God Bless Val Forum Addict Join Date: May 29, 2006 Location: Bewitched in Ohio Posts: 70,382	You have a massive crush on the Puerto Rican detective. The captain's family disappears. You request that Yemana NOT make you coffee. You assume every curly-haired man with glasses knows everything. You think every old man becomes a foster parent after retirement.
	__________________ "Jesus loves you and He approves this message." "I'm alive. I'm feeling good. I'm trying to live every moment as much as I can." - Valerie Harper, March 2013

05-19-2008, 03:16 PM	#7
LeeBlue Member Forum Regular Join Date: Nov 16, 2006 Location: NYS Posts: 871	You know you watch too much Barney Miller when... you walk into a police station and expect to see Bernice. you see a uniformed policeman and think he should look like Officer Levitt.

11-26-2008, 12:32 AM	#15
JAlanRuss72 Eternal Member Eternal Member Frequent Poster Join Date: Nov 22, 2006 Location: Cookeville, TN Posts: 488	You think you might be a werewolf (and you have to get up early to go to worrrrrrrrk) You live in terror of a heavy rain. Your hobbies include crawling around in the sewers looking for alligators and jewel thieves. Your favorite color for a room is olive drab green. Every tie you own is striped and you hate (and I mean HATE) not rolling your sleeves up and unbuttoning your dress shirts. You think the Hassidic Jewish community should just "calm down and maybe take a shave". It's perfectly NORMAL to take seperate vacations from your spouse. The change will do you both GOOD.
	__________________ Jeff Russell Facebook Page: http://facebook.com/Jrussell1972

05-11-2008, 11:46 PM	#3
OH Nuts! Member Forum King Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 133,383	You get mad cravings for: * prune juice bookie sheets long drawn out stories by annoying older detectives *policemen whose last names have c, j, w and x's in them

05-12-2008, 12:10 AM	#4
catlover79 God Bless Val Forum Addict Join Date: May 29, 2006 Location: Bewitched in Ohio Posts: 70,382	You can do a perfect vocal impression of Gregory Peck. You buy day old bread and throw it at pigeons. You have a tendency to break out into rapid-fire Spanish when you get upset. You have a sudden urge for brownies. You think you are turning into a werewolf.

05-12-2008, 10:30 PM	#5
OH Nuts! Member Forum King Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 133,383	You have mad cravings for $700 Gucci shirts and $500 Valentino belts You wished all cops dressed in drag

05-17-2008, 10:06 PM	#6
Mikado Main st bridge Forum Superstar Join Date: Jul 06, 2005 Posts: 25,886	- You assume that all detective squads work out of the top floor of a dingy police station building - You keep a signed baseball at your work space - You get a big cheesy 70s mustache "Cause I look SO good, Barney!" - You'll only eat brownies if they are laced with hash !! - You run to the bathroom every 20 minutes - You spend all your time in your office, listening to the ravings of a senile old man - You answer the phone with "Moshii Moshii"

05-20-2008, 10:06 AM	#8
OH Nuts! Member Forum King Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 133,383	plain old brownies just don't do it for you anymore you must see at least one short ambitious policeman each day You get strong cravings for REALLY AWFUL coffee Everytime you see a box of prunes you think of Fish

05-21-2008, 09:02 PM	#9
CWDogg Member Frequent Poster Join Date: Jul 04, 2005 Posts: 280	You want to learn to play "bass guitar" You spend all day in one room You start crossdressing You quit you're job and adopt a bunch of kids

05-21-2008, 09:04 PM	#10
Ireneparalegal LEGAL SPICE ;) Forum Legend Join Date: Jul 25, 2005 Location: OXNARD, CA - WHERE THE DALLAS COWBOYS TRAIN & PRACTICE Posts: 38,691	^^^^Everyone's posts...

08-30-2008, 12:28 AM	#12
catlover79 God Bless Val Forum Addict Join Date: May 29, 2006 Location: Bewitched in Ohio Posts: 70,382	You must wear the widest ties/lapels you can find. You start rambling on about "me and Foster, Kleiner and Brown". You were/are crushed to learn that Gregory Sierra (Chano) left the show.

09-03-2008, 02:10 PM	#13
catlover79 God Bless Val Forum Addict Join Date: May 29, 2006 Location: Bewitched in Ohio Posts: 70,382	You faint every time you get a shot. You feel the urge to assault the candy machine that shortchanged you. You wonder why Wentworth moved to Arizona, changed her name and became a waitress at a dumpy diner called Mel's. You wonder why Chano became a South American revolutionary named El Puerco. You get excited every time Abe Vigoda does a sketch on Conan O'Brien.

11-25-2008, 11:12 PM	#14
catlover79 God Bless Val Forum Addict Join Date: May 29, 2006 Location: Bewitched in Ohio Posts: 70,382	You use phrases like "cook-a-boos" and "boo-hoos" a la Inspector Lugar. You get frustrated every time someone misspells/mispronounces your long last name a la Wojo.