Friday's Quotes:

[Frank Gannucci]

"A Man's Pride":

Alice: "Why can't we go to the Colonade Room?"

Ralph: "Name me one truck driver who eats there?"

"$99,000 Answer":

Alice: "Trixie just said that she saw you on the show."

Ralph: "What did she think of me?"

Alice: "Well, she said that you are the biggest thing on TV."

"On Stage":

Ralph: "Are you sure that you can type faster than me?"

Ed: "With boxing gloves on."
"One Big Happy Family":

Alice: "One morning, Ed will use the bathroom first. The next
morning, you will use the bathroom first."

Ralph: "Well, that solves my whole problem. Now, I will only be late
every OTHER day."

"Finders Keepers":

(Ralph & Ed are playing pinball.)

Ed: "You can still come up empty you know."

Ralph: "The only thing empty around here is your head."

"The Main Event":

Ralph: "You want my salary to leak out?"

Alice: "Your salary coundn't even drip out."

"Ralph Kramden Presents":

Ralph: "Jackie Gleason is down at that Fun & Sun Capital of the
World."

Ed: "What is he doing down in Perth Amboy?"

"Two Faces of Ralph Kramden":

(Barney Hackett shows off his gang to Ralph & Ed.)

Barney: "These are my boys."

Ralph: "Lovely family."

"Love Letter":

Ralph: "What was she (Trixie) holding behind her back?"

Alice: "Ralph, really it was nothing."

Ralph: "Alice, you don't hold nothing behind your back. You show it out in front so everybody can see it. Now, what was she holding behind her back."

Alice: "All right. She was hiding your birthday present."

Ralph: "Why did you tell me for? You know I like surprises."