Tuesday's Quotes: - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

Frank Gannucci · 02-26-2008, 01:43 AM

"Vacation At Fred's Landing":

Alice: "Have you told Trixie about the change in vacation plans. I know that she wanted to go to Atlantic City."

Ed: "Trixie will go where I want to go."

Ralph: "Atta boy pal! Put your foot down."

Alice: "What are you going to do if she puts up a squawk?"

Ed: "Very simple. I will tell her that Atlantic City is closed for the summer."

"Expectant Father":

(Ralph thinks that he is going to be a father. He wants his new boy to be a fighter.)

Ed: "Why don't you name the kid Percy?"

Ralph: "Percy?"

Ed: "With a name like that, he will be fighting all the time."

"A Woman's Work Is Never Done":

Ed: "I got a solution on how we should remove the dresser. The drawers are probably filled with junk."

Ralph: "That's not a bad idea."

(Ed takes the drawers and puts them on top of the dresser.)

Ralph: "Okay, let's go."

"A Dog's Life":

(Ralph is at the dog pound. He just gave back Alice's dog that he hated, but slowly and surely he started not hating it.)

Ralph: "Is my dog going to get a good home?"

Man: "I hope so."

Ralph: "What do you mean by that?"

Man: "We have several dogs who are only supposed to be here for four days. We got several who are over the limit."

Ralph: "What happens to the dogs who are over the limit?"

Man: "They have to be destoryed."

Ralph: "You mean to tell me that the dog I just gave back is going to be destroyed?" (going into the room where all the dogs are, yells): "WAIT A MINUTE!"

"Hair To A Fortune":

Ed: "Bottle #2: Ho (H2O)"

(Ed dumps the H2O in the bowl in a rather unique way.)

Ralph: "Take it easy with that H20. What do you think it is, water?"

"Cottage For Sale Part 2":

(All of them are in a lemon of a cottage that they bought to stay in so they have a place to stay in for the rest of their lives.)

Ralph (yells): "WOULD YOU GET OFF MY BACK ALICE? WOULD YOU GET OFF MY BACK? I TOLD YOU THIS PLACE WILL LOOK BEAUTIFUL."

Alice (yells): "YOU MADE A MISTAKE. WHY DON'T YOU ADMIT IT RALPH?"

Ralph (yells): "ALL RIGHT! I ADMIT IT! I ADMIT IT! I ADMIT IT! I MADE A MISTAKE. GO AHEAD AND KILL ME. GO AHEAD AND KILL ME."

Alice (yells): "DON'T TEMPT ME RALPH! DON'T TEMPT ME."

"Out of Sight, Out of Mind":

Doctor: "This is an aptitude test Mr. Kramden. You are supposed to take an object and fit it in its respective hole."

Ed: "Can three people play?"

"Mama Loves Mambo":

Ralph (to Carlos): "It's easy for you to play Sir Galahad. You don't work. When you work, you dance. That's not work. When we work, we work. Dirty work. Just take a look at my friends hands and mine and yours."

Ed: "It's not fair to compare my hands to his. I got mine in water all day."

"Letter To The Boss":

Ralph: "Today, I'm fired. Tomorrow, I'm forgotten. They probably wouldn't remember what I looked like."

Ed: "That's okay. You go down there tomorrow and apply for another job."

02-26-2008, 01:43 AM	#1
Frank Gannucci Member Forum Star Join Date: Mar 05, 2007 Posts: 16,090	Tuesday's Quotes: "Vacation At Fred's Landing": Alice: "Have you told Trixie about the change in vacation plans. I know that she wanted to go to Atlantic City." Ed: "Trixie will go where I want to go." Ralph: "Atta boy pal! Put your foot down." Alice: "What are you going to do if she puts up a squawk?" Ed: "Very simple. I will tell her that Atlantic City is closed for the summer." "Expectant Father": (Ralph thinks that he is going to be a father. He wants his new boy to be a fighter.) Ed: "Why don't you name the kid Percy?" Ralph: "Percy?" Ed: "With a name like that, he will be fighting all the time." "A Woman's Work Is Never Done": Ed: "I got a solution on how we should remove the dresser. The drawers are probably filled with junk." Ralph: "That's not a bad idea." (Ed takes the drawers and puts them on top of the dresser.) Ralph: "Okay, let's go." "A Dog's Life": (Ralph is at the dog pound. He just gave back Alice's dog that he hated, but slowly and surely he started not hating it.) Ralph: "Is my dog going to get a good home?" Man: "I hope so." Ralph: "What do you mean by that?" Man: "We have several dogs who are only supposed to be here for four days. We got several who are over the limit." Ralph: "What happens to the dogs who are over the limit?" Man: "They have to be destoryed." Ralph: "You mean to tell me that the dog I just gave back is going to be destroyed?" (going into the room where all the dogs are, yells): "WAIT A MINUTE!" "Hair To A Fortune": Ed: "Bottle #2: Ho (H2O)" (Ed dumps the H2O in the bowl in a rather unique way.) Ralph: "Take it easy with that H20. What do you think it is, water?" "Cottage For Sale Part 2": (All of them are in a lemon of a cottage that they bought to stay in so they have a place to stay in for the rest of their lives.) Ralph (yells): "WOULD YOU GET OFF MY BACK ALICE? WOULD YOU GET OFF MY BACK? I TOLD YOU THIS PLACE WILL LOOK BEAUTIFUL." Alice (yells): "YOU MADE A MISTAKE. WHY DON'T YOU ADMIT IT RALPH?" Ralph (yells): "ALL RIGHT! I ADMIT IT! I ADMIT IT! I ADMIT IT! I MADE A MISTAKE. GO AHEAD AND KILL ME. GO AHEAD AND KILL ME." Alice (yells): "DON'T TEMPT ME RALPH! DON'T TEMPT ME." "Out of Sight, Out of Mind": Doctor: "This is an aptitude test Mr. Kramden. You are supposed to take an object and fit it in its respective hole." Ed: "Can three people play?" "Mama Loves Mambo": Ralph (to Carlos): "It's easy for you to play Sir Galahad. You don't work. When you work, you dance. That's not work. When we work, we work. Dirty work. Just take a look at my friends hands and mine and yours." Ed: "It's not fair to compare my hands to his. I got mine in water all day." "Letter To The Boss": Ralph: "Today, I'm fired. Tomorrow, I'm forgotten. They probably wouldn't remember what I looked like." Ed: "That's okay. You go down there tomorrow and apply for another job."