Favorite Quotes - Sitcoms Online Message Boards

friendcarr · 09-25-2007, 11:06 PM

Post you're favorite quotes of any Sitcom here. If you don't know the direct quote, just post what is close

Here are my favorite:

"I might have known I'd find another woman here." - Marcia Brady (Season 4)
"Well, you caught me at a bad time, I usually have 3 or 4." - Greg Brady (Season 4)

and

In season 1:
Alice is sad Tiger has too leave cuz jan is alergic to him and she says stupid dog...forgot what she actually says, ill get that sometime.

comedyfreak · 09-26-2007, 01:00 AM

From The Brady Bunch, not sure what season.
Mrs. Brady and Alice just get back from shopping, they're in the kitchen unloading their goodies. Alice says to Mrs. Brady:
"I hate going shopping the lines, all the pushing and shoving." "Gee, I hope I didn't hurt anybody".

From The Munster's love any scene where Lilly scolds Herman, she says:
"Well Herman, You goofed it again".

Bewitched Sam, Uncle Arthur, Endora, and Serena together at the dinner table while Uncle Arthur successfully does the table cloth trick.
Endora: "He did it, with no power. That Clown did it!".

treky · 09-26-2007, 01:47 AM

from MASH-Hawkeye to Radar: "Go on, get mad. I love it when those little wisps of steam come out of your ears".

Radr's in the swamp, and Hawk and B.J. are helping him with his writing course:
Radar-"Question 5. Describe a nice scene out your window". They all turn and look out on all 3 sides. Radar then looks back at the instruction book: "Question 6".

friendcarr · 09-30-2007, 09:58 PM

"I'm Not Brave, I'm Stupid." - Marcia Brady

Season 2.

AB · 10-02-2007, 09:12 AM

From The Bang Theory

Sheldon talking to Lenard - "If you got the time to lean you got the time to clean."

Ohio8 · 10-02-2007, 04:58 PM

M*A*S*H/Klinger (to interviewer): "I hate the damn Army. But I love these people." Hot Lips: "Well you have to understand, I'm Regular Army. Most of (them) are not. They're a terribly unruly, undisciplined bunch -- and I thank God for each and every one of them when those casualties roll in."

bingbangbaby · 10-02-2007, 10:45 PM

Bewitched, Darrin to Endora: "Don't you have a house to haunt?"

Who's the Boss?, Mona to Angela: "Oh don't be so sexist. A man can do meaningless, unproductive work just as well as a woman."

freshprinceofLA · 10-02-2007, 10:56 PM

Who's the boss?
Tony Micilli's oh so famous line
"Aye oh, Oh aye"

treky · 10-03-2007, 02:56 AM

from the pilot of THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES-
Pearl: "Jed, Elly May came over t' my place an' said ya sold th' swamp ta some oil comp'ny".
Jed:"Yea, ah guess ah did".
Pearl: "Wha'd they pay ya fer it"?
Jed: "They ain't paid me nothin' yet. That Brewster feller said he'd be by with th' money later".
Pearl: "Well, how much they gonna pay ya"?
Jed: "He didn't say".
Pearl: "Well he must have mentioned some amount".
Jed: "now Pearl, you know that ol' swamp ain't worth shucks".
Pearl: "Jed Clampett, ya got slickered an' you're 'shamed ta admit it"!
Granny: "Thas' jus' what I tol' him".
Pearl: "Granny, how much they gonna pay him"?
Jed: "Alright, ah'll tell ya! That Brewster fella said somewheres around twenny-fave".
Pearl: "Twenny-fave dollars"?
Jed: "Ah know it don't sound like much, but he seemed ta' put great store in th' fac' that he's gonna pay me in some new kin' o' dollars".
Pearl "New kin' o'...Jed, they AIN'T no new kin' o' dollars".
Jed: "Well, theys new ta' me. I heard o' silver dollars, paper dollars. But he said he's gonna pay me in..." (turns to Granny) "What kin' did he say agin', Granny"?
Granny: "Million...dollars".
Jed: (turns back to Pearl) "That's it. Twenty-fave to a hunnert million dollars".

from the episode JETHRO GOES TO SCHOOL: Jed and Jethro are enrolling Jethro in a prestigious private school-
Headmisstress: "You do know we charge tuition"?
Jed: "Does thet mean we gotta pay"?
Headmisstress: "Yes it does. And it is quite beyond your means; I am sure".
Jed: "Well; anythin's ok ma'am; as long as it ain't over twenty-fave million".
Headmistress: (looking surprised) "TWENTY-FIVE MILLION DOLLARS"?
Jed: "Yes ma'am".
Headmisstress: "You have twenty-five million dollars"?
Jed: "Yes ma'm".
Jethro: "In cash"
Jed: Yes ma'm. Sorry it cain't be more, but that's all ah got".

treky · 10-04-2007, 03:12 AM

from MASH-Charles walks into the swamp and sees B.J.:

Charles-"Hunnicut"
B.J.-"Winchester"
Charles-"Where's your friend Pierce"?
B.J.-"It's thursday"
Charles-"So"?
B.J."The nurses hang their underwear on the line. He takes a sandwich and makes a day of it".
Charles-"Why this constant preocupation with sex"?
B.J.-"Lack of ocupation with it".

a drunk Hot Lips to Trapper: "Ther you are...you aminal"!

"You know what I've always liked about you, TrapperJohnIntyre"?

OH Nuts! · 10-04-2007, 10:11 PM

Maude to Archie when he gets his chair back

"You can have your chair Archie. Just don't move around in it too much, I wouldn't watch you to crush your brains" (or something very close to this)

friendcarr · 10-06-2007, 12:32 AM

okay this isn't from a sitcom, but the brady bunch movie...

"Put on your Sunday's Best kids, We're going to Sears!" - Mike Brady

"A wise man once said, Wherever you go, There you are." - Mike Brady

heheh.

treky · 10-06-2007, 02:40 AM

THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES-when the Clampetts first pull up to their house; and Mr. Drysdale's standing out front:
Mr. Drysdale-"Welcome, welcome! This is your new home".
Elly May-"Is this a house"?
Drysdale-"Yes! It was built by John Barrymore, one of our great movie actors".
Jed-"An' a raght fin' stone mason, too"!

phoebe7165 · 10-08-2007, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Keith L.

From The Bang Theory

Sheldon talking to Lenard - "If you got the time to lean you got the time to clean."

I watched that episode, it was my 1st time watching that show and I laughed at that line. Of course, you would've had to watch the scene to really understand what that was all about.

Frasier
Frasier - Oh Niles, I don't have time for your insanity, I'm about to steal a get-well card from a kidney patient.

Friends
Phoebe(after tasting a bad batch of Monica's cookies) - Dear Lord, this must be what evil tastes like!

Rezny@gmail.com · 10-08-2007, 10:04 PM

From a last season new house/Universal City Studios epiode of "Leave it to Beaver"-an older Beaver is calling upstairs to Wally as Eddie and Lumpy come in the door:"Hey Wally,the goon brothers are here!" Also,in the new house episode from 1962,"A Night in the Woods"-the Cleavers are sitting around the breakfast table :Beaver:"You know,even I felt sorry for Eddie" Ward:"You did?"Beaver:"Yeah.Until he started telling the ranger how to run the forest."

09-25-2007, 11:06 PM	#1
friendcarr Dallas Cowboys 6-1 Frequent Poster Join Date: Aug 04, 2007 Location: kansas Posts: 382	Favorite Quotes *Post you're favorite quotes of any Sitcom here. If you don't know the direct quote, just post what is close* Here are my favorite: "I might have known I'd find another woman here." - Marcia Brady (Season 4) "Well, you caught me at a bad time, I usually have 3 or 4." - Greg Brady (Season 4) and In season 1: Alice is sad Tiger has too leave cuz jan is alergic to him and she says stupid dog...forgot what she actually says, ill get that sometime.

09-26-2007, 01:00 AM	#2
comedyfreak Cheers! Forum Fanatic Join Date: Dec 14, 2005 Location: Sunny California Posts: 11,058	From The Brady Bunch, not sure what season. Mrs. Brady and Alice just get back from shopping, they're in the kitchen unloading their goodies. Alice says to Mrs. Brady: "I hate going shopping the lines, all the pushing and shoving." "Gee, I hope I didn't hurt anybody". From The Munster's love any scene where Lilly scolds Herman, she says: "Well Herman, You goofed it again". Bewitched Sam, Uncle Arthur, Endora, and Serena together at the dinner table while Uncle Arthur successfully does the table cloth trick. Endora: "He did it, with no power. That Clown did it!".
	__________________ www.facebook.com/comedyfreak Last edited by comedyfreak; 09-26-2007 at 09:38 AM.

09-26-2007, 01:47 AM	#3
treky star trek fan Eternal Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 25, 2002 Location: Conshohocken, pennsylvania Posts: 14,490	from MASH-Hawkeye to Radar: "Go on, get mad. I love it when those little wisps of steam come out of your ears". Radr's in the swamp, and Hawk and B.J. are helping him with his writing course: Radar-"Question 5. Describe a nice scene out your window". They all turn and look out on all 3 sides. Radar then looks back at the instruction book: "Question 6".
	__________________ the Clampetts are in a fancy Beverly Hills jewelry store. Granny points to a tray of rubies. Granny: "How much fer one o' them red diamonds?" clerk: "Madam, those are rubies." Granny: "OK ask her kin we buy one offa her." clerk: " The ruby I am talking about is not a lady." Granny: "Lissen, how she got them diamonds is her business. I'm just sayin' ask her kin we buy one from her."

10-02-2007, 10:56 PM	#8
freshprinceofLA The Bosses Senior Member Join Date: Aug 09, 2005 Location: A small town in: Los Angeles, California Posts: 2,810	Who's the boss? Tony Micilli's oh so famous line "Aye oh, Oh aye"
	__________________ My favorite show is... Who's the boss? #2 Three's Company #3 Moonlighting RELEASE ALL SEASONS OF WHO'S THE BOSS? ON DVD Watch ION at 9:00 to 10:00 I <3 SAMANTHA! RAIDERS SUCK R.I.P. PAC & BIG we miss yall

09-30-2007, 09:58 PM	#4
friendcarr Dallas Cowboys 6-1 Frequent Poster Join Date: Aug 04, 2007 Location: kansas Posts: 382	"I'm Not Brave, I'm Stupid." - Marcia Brady Season 2.

10-02-2007, 09:12 AM	#5
AB Member Eternal Member Forum Icon Join Date: Dec 26, 2006 Location: The South Posts: 59,429	From The Bang Theory Sheldon talking to Lenard - "If you got the time to lean you got the time to clean."

10-02-2007, 04:58 PM	#6
Ohio8 Member Forum Star Join Date: Jul 29, 2003 Location: Wherever you aren't. Posts: 18,912	MASH*/Klinger (to interviewer): "I hate the damn Army. But I love these people." Hot Lips: "Well you have to understand, I'm Regular Army. Most of (them) are not. They're a terribly unruly, undisciplined bunch -- and I thank God for each and every one of them when those casualties roll in."

10-02-2007, 10:45 PM	#7
bingbangbaby I see you!! Senior Member Join Date: Jul 15, 2007 Location: USA Posts: 1,070	Bewitched, Darrin to Endora: "Don't you have a house to haunt?" Who's the Boss?, Mona to Angela: "Oh don't be so sexist. A man can do meaningless, unproductive work just as well as a woman."

10-03-2007, 02:56 AM	#9
treky star trek fan Eternal Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 25, 2002 Location: Conshohocken, pennsylvania Posts: 14,490	from the pilot of THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES- Pearl: "Jed, Elly May came over t' my place an' said ya sold th' swamp ta some oil comp'ny". Jed:"Yea, ah guess ah did". Pearl: "Wha'd they pay ya fer it"? Jed: "They ain't paid me nothin' yet. That Brewster feller said he'd be by with th' money later". Pearl: "Well, how much they gonna pay ya"? Jed: "He didn't say". Pearl: "Well he must have mentioned some amount". Jed: "now Pearl, you know that ol' swamp ain't worth shucks". Pearl: "Jed Clampett, ya got slickered an' you're 'shamed ta admit it"! Granny: "Thas' jus' what I tol' him". Pearl: "Granny, how much they gonna pay him"? Jed: "Alright, ah'll tell ya! That Brewster fella said somewheres around twenny-fave". Pearl: "Twenny-fave dollars"? Jed: "Ah know it don't sound like much, but he seemed ta' put great store in th' fac' that he's gonna pay me in some new kin' o' dollars". Pearl "New kin' o'...Jed, they AIN'T no new kin' o' dollars". Jed: "Well, theys new ta' me. I heard o' silver dollars, paper dollars. But he said he's gonna pay me in..." (turns to Granny) "What kin' did he say agin', Granny"? Granny: "Million...dollars". Jed: (turns back to Pearl) "That's it. Twenty-fave to a hunnert million dollars". from the episode JETHRO GOES TO SCHOOL: Jed and Jethro are enrolling Jethro in a prestigious private school- Headmisstress: "You do know we charge tuition"? Jed: "Does thet mean we gotta pay"? Headmisstress: "Yes it does. And it is quite beyond your means; I am sure". Jed: "Well; anythin's ok ma'am; as long as it ain't over twenty-fave million". Headmistress: (looking surprised) "TWENTY-FIVE MILLION DOLLARS"? Jed: "Yes ma'am". Headmisstress: "You have twenty-five million dollars"? Jed: "Yes ma'm". Jethro: "In cash" Jed: Yes ma'm. Sorry it cain't be more, but that's all ah got".

10-04-2007, 03:12 AM	#10
treky star trek fan Eternal Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 25, 2002 Location: Conshohocken, pennsylvania Posts: 14,490	from MASH-Charles walks into the swamp and sees B.J.: Charles-"Hunnicut" B.J.-"Winchester" Charles-"Where's your friend Pierce"? B.J.-"It's thursday" Charles-"So"? B.J."The nurses hang their underwear on the line. He takes a sandwich and makes a day of it". Charles-"Why this constant preocupation with sex"? B.J.-"Lack of ocupation with it". a drunk Hot Lips to Trapper: "Ther you are...you aminal"! "You know what I've always liked about you, TrapperJohnIntyre"?

10-04-2007, 10:11 PM	#11
OH Nuts! Member Forum King Join Date: Feb 15, 2005 Posts: 133,383	Maude to Archie when he gets his chair back "You can have your chair Archie. Just don't move around in it too much, I wouldn't watch you to crush your brains" (or something very close to this)

10-06-2007, 12:32 AM	#12
friendcarr Dallas Cowboys 6-1 Frequent Poster Join Date: Aug 04, 2007 Location: kansas Posts: 382	okay this isn't from a sitcom, but the brady bunch movie... "Put on your Sunday's Best kids, We're going to Sears!" - Mike Brady "A wise man once said, Wherever you go, There you are." - Mike Brady heheh.

10-06-2007, 02:40 AM	#13
treky star trek fan Eternal Member Forum Fanatic Join Date: Feb 25, 2002 Location: Conshohocken, pennsylvania Posts: 14,490	THE BEVERLY HILLBILLIES-when the Clampetts first pull up to their house; and Mr. Drysdale's standing out front: Mr. Drysdale-"Welcome, welcome! This is your new home". Elly May-"Is this a house"? Drysdale-"Yes! It was built by John Barrymore, one of our great movie actors". Jed-"An' a raght fin' stone mason, too"!

10-08-2007, 10:04 PM	#15
Rezny@gmail.com Member Senior Member Join Date: Jul 20, 2007 Location: Nebraska Posts: 2,675	From a last season new house/Universal City Studios epiode of "Leave it to Beaver"-an older Beaver is calling upstairs to Wally as Eddie and Lumpy come in the door:"Hey Wally,the goon brothers are here!" Also,in the new house episode from 1962,"A Night in the Woods"-the Cleavers are sitting around the breakfast table :Beaver:"You know,even I felt sorry for Eddie" Ward:"You did?"Beaver:"Yeah.Until he started telling the ranger how to run the forest."